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oldbongo has written 56 posts
boredom in the time of the cholera
well, after waiting many months in anticipation for a movie that could have been great, and reading all the critics negative reviews, we are muy dissapointed with it. 50 million spent, and nothing to speak of cinematically, and the story was reduced to confusion. we should have saved the 10 bucks. ...
a ghost appears only today...
on halloween, oldbongo sends greetings from the other side, to all his old friends and victims. here, in the institution of the lifeless, things are quiet. even kat and elmo no longer haunt the halls. ...
who is going to be the first to risk it???
no doubt, every single one of the male readers is enchanted by the sparkling image of Kat1, and none more than oldbongo himself. However, he is chained by la commandante so securely, it is impossible to imagine flying to wales, on wings of hope, alas....... but you, fellow dreamers, must, between all of your wussie asses, be able to find one, who has the stones to go for it. that faire lady is sitting over there in an ivory tower with gold bars on the windows, guarded by a lord. so, which of y ...
who knows about pre-columbian gold??
oldbongo would be interested to hear about anyones' experience with this material. apparently, there exists a market for it, but it is very difficult to obtain information on since different countries have different legal positions on it's possession and trade.
everyone wants it, and no one is willing to open up for fear of being challenged on some legal issue.
arguably, colombian made gold objects are the most desirable, as the art was first developed in the region, and was from t ...
life in the institution.....
you know, everything was goin' along just fine until they put oldbongo away..........damm federales!!!
what happened was, la commandante started to notice
changes in oldbongos' personal ways....he started cleaning the toilet compulsively, he started swearing a lot, and only wanted to jump her from behind.
then he lost control of his ability to suppress shrieks of uncontrollable laughter at anytime of day or night.
the problem was, oldbongos' ahlzheimers has b ...
the best salsa...
we know you all have your favorites,
and we would all like to share them,
but forget the music,...
oldbongo dares anyone to refute his posit that his homemade salsa cucaracha is the best condiment on earth.
...of course one must be sufficiently cultured and educated to appreciate its delicate composition.
...desi. ...
me gwine cartagena....
yay!!!!
oldbongos' flying tonite on the redeye, and it'll still take 24 hours to reach, but if anyone wants to see a short, fat, old, bald, hairy, ugly, poor lookin, retard,..with a big smile on his face, just come to bony's kiosco en la playa around lunchtime. ...
these colombians sure know how to party...
so 15 minutes ago, in san jacinto, outside cartagena, during the usual saturday nite carnaval festivities, another one bit the dust over another beer.cousin and neigbor get into a scrap, one shot dead tonite.
read about it tomorrow. ...
happy valentines to some very special people....
and you know who you are....
oldbongo got his today from san jacinto, bolivar.
which is where the jak "fiesta" is being prepared for
it's journey down the magdalena next month, terminating
in bahia cartagena, after stopping in barranquilla to pick up supplies,....and elmo. ...
how do you make the accent??
above the letter "n" ....
like in bano,..senor..etc......
do you need an israeli keyboard, or what??
gracias.
where is Kat ?????????
she has left too many guys with blue....... hopes..
we hope she wasn't kidnapped.
we hope she wasn't lured into some rich mafiosos harem.
we hope she hasn't forgotten elmo.
maybe she got kidnapped BY elmo.
anyway, kat,...happy new year,...hope eveything is shiny. ...
favorite elmo moment....
so, after a bong induced time warp to amnesia,
the old one was drifting through the more important things in life, and all of a sudden, he realized that
something important was not being done.
we have to save elmos' favorite moments....
what happened to you when you read them??..
red face??... coffee on the keyboard???... tears???
choking???...stich in your side???...pity???...mas?
personally, having had the uncomm ...
elmos' chicken dance supreme..
disclaimer:...those under eighteen must not look.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Psb_AYvKV04&search=chicken%20dance
the oldgringo is renouncing his handle......
because he does not want to voluntarily soil himself anymore with any asssociation that implies any commonality with USA........beacause....
Today, la commandante was denied, again, a measly tourist visa to go to hawaii, at the us consul in boncouver, second time in two years, even though everything was in PERFECT order......
why......??
same young punk officer ogled la commandante, displaid a perfect sneer at the oldone, in obvious jelousy, and said, wait a few more months ...
who deleted elmo??
and why,...another conspiracy??
the oldgringo thinks kat did it.
she disabled her cookies, and they got infected.
don't worry, we'll just blow three smoke rings,
an everything will clear up. ...
who the heck is deleting the oldgringos' posts???
and why??...somebody doesn't like succinct?
something to consider..
the people of the altiplano chew coca..
the people of africa chew kat..
the people of south asia chew betel-nut..
the people of the jungle drink ayahuasca..
the people of the pueblo eat peyote..
the people of asia eat opium..
none of these people can have ever heard of the story of creation as given in GENESIS...:
" ..and you shall have every plant bearing seed, and it shall be for you as your food"
but the writer knew of th ...
something to consider...
the people of the altiplano chew coca..
the people of africa chew kat..
the people of south asia chew betel-nut..
the people of the jungle drink ayahuasca..
the people of the pueblo eat peyote..
the people of asia eat opium..
none of these people can have ever heard of the story of creation as given in GENESIS...:
" ..and you shall have every plant bearing seed, and it shall be for you as your food"
but the writer knew of th ...
a bad insult...help!!
the oldgringo is learning a lesson..
the worst thing you can call a costena...
..."nina"...(sorry no accent on keyboard)
man, since the oldgringo gave her a gentle reprimand,
she hasn't said a word for two days, and today is three.
at least i woke up with my neck intact.
but the question is..colombiche,madrediosa,
what does an oldgringo do?
hethinks just wait...
or, get ready to join elmo under the bridge. ...
cartagena culture...un historia...bravo!!!!
...long post,...worthy.
Don Víctor Nieto Núñez celebrará
90 años con Cartagena
Con el fin de rendir un homenaje al director del
Festival Internacional de Cine, Don Víctor Nieto
Núñez, el próximo seis de mayo, día de de sus
cumpleaños, un grupo de amigos y amigas han
programado un evento de reconocimiento por su labor y
desempeño en la historia cultural de la ciudad.
El acto se inicia con una misa d ...
has anyone done it???...tinto??
colombian moves north,..becomes citizen..
aquires possesions, and then decides to return
to colombia, with the car, etc....como se possible?
call colombian embassey,..directed to dian, internet..
....nothing.
help!! ...
A quote from "on the gringo trail"
...the gringo trail extends across South America along the spine of the Andes mountains. Starting from the city of Cartagena, on the Colombian coast, it runs past Silvia to Otovalo, Equador. From there it winds south and upward to Machu Pichu-passes through bolivia, and finally ends near Iguaza Falls on the border of Brazil,Paraguay and Argentina..........
......Cartagena was a much cooler town before Spring '74, when a gringo left a kilo of coke behind when he checked out. The to ...
...a quote, from.."on the gringo trail"
'...the gringo trail extends across South America along the spine of the Andes mountains. Starting from the city of Cartagena, on the Colombian coast, it runs past Silvia to Otovalo, Equador. From there it winds south and upward to Machu Pichu-passes through bolivia, and finally ends near Iguaza Falls on the border of Brazil,Paraguay and Argentina..........
......Cartagena was a much cooler town before Spring '74, when a gringo left a kilo of coke behind when he checked out. The t ...
la comandante is back...
the oldgringo picked up la comandante at the airport last nite, after her return from solving all the problems of her pueblo for another year, and let the old one tell you,:
within 5 minutes of getting home, she had the oldgringo down on all fours,.."squealing like a pig"....
elmo woulda been proud.
what is with these corroncha costenitas?
never mind all those debates about visas and money..
she just seems to like short,fat,old,bald,hairy,retarded..... ...
hey elmo...
the oldgringo wants to know if you can hook him up with daisy martinez.??...she rocks..
..latin food with yiddish jokes.
seasons greetings, happy holidaze, felis navidad, namaste, shalom, sawadee
from the original third person poster...
if you don't know,..
just ask the one who knows all...
the oldgringo..
hey elmo...where's our photo??
la commadante arrives christmas night with a big sack. ...
you think tourist visas are tough to get in bogota?
try this on for size..
today the young gringo whippersnapper visa officer in vancouver,...
... denied a tourist visa for la commandante, (a permanent resident of canada for one year,
full-time employed here, living common-law with the oldgringo, all perfectly documented.)
...to travel to hawaii............why?....he's a jealous twerp. + $115....ka-chinga!!!
go figure..???.... ..guess what?? as a canadian resident, she can now go anywhere in the ...
bringing personal goods to colombia by container
who can tell an oldgringo if it's possible to ship a container load of personal items to colombia from afuera. the personal items belong to a colombiana living abroad. taxes???
say hello and goodbye to colombias first rastafarian.
the oldgringo first met orvil "bill" bains in 1972..
and has remained close until last thursday,when he passed away,
to join his heros,bob marley and peter tosh.
he told me he was born by accident in providencia,colombia.
he built and lived in rasta house, in el caballete.
bill was preacher, teacher, student, father, son, and bush doctor to many.
everyone who really knows providence,...knows of bill.
we will ...
elmo sends his love...corroncho stlyle...
Submitted by oldgringo on Fri, 02/18/2005 - 21:23. | Report a problem (See the rules)
the oldgringo can tell you that elmoso is in fine form,
but he is so deep in the costeno life at this moment,
that he has no time to come up for air,
however, when he does, you guys are gonna be well advised to keep some asswipe handy,
cause you're gonna crap yourselves laughing,
for sure,the oldgringo left elmo one happy camper,
after a taste of the timewarp.
all the arepas con huevo you can eat!!
and ice cream too..the oldgringo invites,(dares) all
to come and enjoy the reunion with elmo next week.
we won't be hard to find, we'll be the two oldmodefoques
lounging in the company of at least two princessas, and friends,
making some noise around the carpa, surrounded by bottles,
on the beach,in front of hotel caribe,
while we are waiting for the yacht,
with the burro and burritos on board,
to appear from the west. ...
the oldgringo is the original poster ...
in the third person,...
any others are plagiarists.........
colombian voodoo......brujos y brujas...afro?...indio?...loco?....
the oldgringo knows he has to be ready for ANYTHING...
but is this ridiculous.........or...?????
la commandantes' little brother is apparently bewitched,
by a girl, to the point he neglects his family, does criminal things,
and this causes his parents stress...
the mother goes to talk to the girl, asks her
to respect family values,.. girl gets mad and curses mom.
next thing, the girl is seen digging a hole,
placing a doll in the h ...
CARTAGENA FILM FESTIVAL......
meet don victor, and gerardo nieto,
founder, and director, of this,at 45 years,
the oldest and most important film festival
in latin america.
these people are responsible in a very large way for the
increase and distribution of culture and education in
latin america,in general, and colombia, in particular,
and should be a source of pride, and a recipiant of support
for and from all colombians.
festicinecartagena.co ...
hey everyone...i am the trolls favorite...
he even told me so,straight to my screen..
and so,if any trolls want to be entertained,
come on down!!!
i'm retired.........
no, just retarded...
que paso con mi computador??..or is it the site??
the damm page looks like it injected a bunch of steroids today,
and the oldgringo is too retarded to adjust,so he doesn't like it.
the wife from hell....
A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked
you at 80 miles per hour, sir." The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it
on
cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear,
you know that this car doesn't have cruise control."
As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife
and growl ...
when the oldgringo was young....
when the oldgringo was young,...
he did it thrice daily.
when he was middle-aged...
he did it tri-weekly.
now that he's old...
he just tries, weakly.
elmos' expertise,...please...
good morning son..
the oldgringo woke up troubled today over this
haunting mexico-colombia question.
in colombia, we all know how you love your burros,
but in mexico, the oldgringo is afraid they just
chop up the little ones and put them in those things
that they call burritos. is this really true??
and is this the true basis for the malice between the two cultures?
after seeing the mercados of mexico, i wouldn't put it past them. ...
somebody can explain, please, why is it called papaya??....
the culture of papaya is well known and understood,
but what is the reason for the name????
the three "little mermaids"
anybody know them?
anybody seen them?
for canadians....
the oldgringo wrote a long discourse on canadian
tourist and family class sponsorship visas...very comprehensive,..
when he submitted it,..guess what pedro,...lost...timed out.
so, he is too pissed right now to do that again,leaving the
invitation open to inform anyone who is interested. ...
more tragedy...more warnings...
it can happen anywhere...
cartagena...el universal...front page
yesterday, my taxi driver's brother was shot dead.
third taxi driver this season...
there are so many locos, in cartagena too,
so walk lightly...and don't resist thieves who
will kill you for your pesos.
condolences to tito ...
pot smoking
this should elicit a few comments...
in canada we welcome you with warm bongs..
in america everyone seems paranoid, for good reason...reefer madness lives.
in colombia,i have been in love with la mona since 1972,
but i have had cops try to shake me for mordida, and i have had
politicos ask me to score for them. i have never gotten a straight
answer, the same answer from any two authorities, from the head
prosecutor on down to the tourist p ...
dear cowboy...
the oldgringo notices the gleam of light that cracked
through today,..it means that at midnite,
you will turn into a pumpkin,
recover your ability to assist the world to turn smoothly,
and reserve your talent for the inane,
for the most timely opportunities,...like..
when elmo comes back..
i think that more people need your help than me..
happier new year... ...
don't stop,cowboy...
please, don't stop!!!
just keep at it,...
the rarified atmosphere of the inane is a new and
very promising addition to this unique menagerie.
just think,...with a little more experience, soon
you'll be able to blesh with elmo,on your new show...
besides,your previous presence,was usually just
a voice of reason,..anyone can do that! ...
colombia/columbia??
for the scholars please,
what is the relationship here??
i live in a place that has been known for 150years as
british columbia,where the headwaters of the columbia river originate.
have travelled to gran colombia for 35 years,
have had all norteamerican explanations that columbia is the
english TRANSLATION for colombia, therefore that is how it is printed in
countless references to colombia,but it bugs me.
does anyone know ...
sobrebarriga receta ...please
i know some of you can help me..
desi,.. lionheart,..not elmo,...someone who can cook con gusto.
mucho aprecio
my idea for elmo...
this boy is the undiscovered howard stern of today.
elmo i beleive you are about to break out into online stardom.
we have to find a way to have one of these techno-savvy guys
set you up with a site that people get to start you off and you just go by the minute.
they will be laughing and paying so hard you will be $$$rico in no time.
i just want to be a member for free.
are we goin fishn or what?? ...
angina,..heart attack..anyone???
what is an oldgringo to do when this happens in cartagena?
here, we have 911 which gets you the right help, pronto.
there,...who knows????
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