livinlovinmivida has left 5 comments

livinlovinmivida comments on OAXACA - MEN'S LEATHER SHOULDER/ MESSENGER BAG

anyone have a friend in OAXACA who can go on a shopping mission? there will be compensation

livinlovinmivida comments on

argh. information overload! i had no idea the kind of maelstrom that this has caused... i do appreciate everyone taking the time to post their thoughts, feelings, experiences, etc. while i am admittedly a newbie (to pbh and colombia), i am not unaware of the raw emotions and complicated dynamics involved in this situation. i know that there are poignant issues (political, socio-economic, gender, cultural) that arise. and i know that there are assumptions and expectations from all sides (male, female, american, colombian). so, i come from a place of respect... yes - there are those that seek to exploit and take advantage of a situation (either the gringo looking for the hot piece of a## or the calena looking for a way out). but trust and understanding are universal values. and some gringos and colombianas are looking for a special kind of comfort and security....remember: this site is called POOR BUT HAPPY!! (and, rest assured, that is what i am). i'm not here because i have some unrealistic/ idealistic/ romanticized idea of what a colombiana girl is and what she is not (truth is, i have no idea...). i'm not blissfully ignorant about any of it. and, i only know what my friend tells me. and i trust that she is being real. and, i reserve judgment on the rest after we meet. my concerns, then, aren't whether or not i am being taken for a ride...rather, i am more concerned with cultural norms and customs that i may not be aware of (different from the US). i love this topic more and more because it has so little to do with two people (and so much more to do with humanity). moment of pause in praise of the internet!!! (with slight appall at how much time i spend on it) no pictures just yet. i'll wait until i have one with us together (and subject myself to the ridicule of the peanut gallery ;) --travel friendly

livinlovinmivida comments on

"Livin... would you prefer one of us go meet her first, and then report back" i really appreciate the offer, but i respectfully will decline. i think that what i have learned from this whole posting feed is that i simply must trust my own instincts. yes. i might get played or burned or worse. she might be a liar. a cheat. a golddigger. a visadigger. all of the above are possible. and with any relationship (not just with a colombiana) this may happen. i am not naive to the evils of the world. i live in new york city (where the hustlers will prey). and i have seen alot of ploys from both good and bad scamartists. but, i know that my friend is genuine, real, and honest. she is down-to-earth (not superficial and materialistic). and she's willing to invest herself in me. so, the least i can do, is have faith in her. thank you to those that are really interested...i find everything to be helpful.

livinlovinmivida comments on

thank you Darloup . sounds like you know first hand of what i speak...and your perspective is respected by me. "You're Anglo-saxon and she is a latina. Enough said, you've been bewitched" -- sorry but i don't know what you mean by this...could i have some clarification or specifics in terms of your own experience and relationship with the lil' miss. also, out of curiosity...not that i am ANYWHERE there...when and how did you know (if at all) that you committed to overcoming the difficulties?? gun to the head by lil' miss? j/k. thanks.

livinlovinmivida comments on

ouch! i probably deserve whatever criticisms i get on this one. i know that there probably is nothing more cliche than a gringo with a colombian fetish (but this is no fetish). i have dated many many girls in my years (some of the relationships were successful and others were decidedly not). i've dated girls of all shapes and sizes, from near and far...but, i always felt like something was missing...REAL TRUE COMPASSION. now, let me just say: this is NOT an ideal situation. i live in the US. she lives in Colombia. I speak mostly english (with a little bit of spanish). she speaks only spanish. i've been in long distance and interracial relationships (with all the attendant problems therein). but this is a very different animal! i know that there are so many reasons not to engage in this relationship. and i am very realistic about the prospects of success (measured only by happiness subtracted by frustration and pain). BUT whoever above talked about illogical was right on..this makes so little sense in so many ways yet there is a strong compulsion to forge ahead. so again...i'm here for one reason: to engage others about their experiences (good, bad, neutral), the issues that need to be overcome, and the questions that remain to be answered. NOTE: I know that relationships are relationships (no matter if they are intercontinental). but, i could see how my situation may speak a little differently... cheers.