You know your in Colombia when..................

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:14:

you see cows outside your apartment in bogota.

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

mranderson says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:17:

you see a horse taking a stroll down the sidewalk all alone on a main avenue, no saddle or anything.

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:17:

When your neighbors actually look at you and greet you!

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

robi666 says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:18:

They find a "fosa comun" in your finca.

"I am a citizen of the most beautiful nation on earth. A nation whose laws are harsh yet simple, a nation that never cheats, which is immense and without borders, where life is lived in the present."

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:21:

a coca plant is growing in the back yard

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:22:

I see all the anti-Colombians are having a field day with this thread!

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:22:

your pasty as hell, overr 45 never been much of a ladies man and all of a sudden ladies are paying attention to you.

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:23:

... Monday 9:30 AM and you see people drinking Aguila in the next tienda.

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:28:

your awake tuesday at 3:30 in morning because your neighbors are blasting vallenato...jajajajja

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

rona says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:47:

. . . arepa con huevo & a Kola Roman is your idea of a snack.

rona says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:55:

. . . you can afford to have somebody cook and clean for you and still have money left to go out.

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 11:58:

The cashier at your local retail department store is willing to personally walk you to the item you can't find.

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:00:

When you can choose which seats you want to sit in when you buy your tickets at the movie theater.

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:00:

your standing in line at the store and somebody walks in and cuts you in line just as you are about to ask your question

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:02:

When you can put up a nativity scene at your local mall without having to worry about secular-progressive groups bitch about it.

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:02:

when someone outside is shouting, Buñuelos, tamales, envueltos de mazorca
O someone just pop in your front door and say Buenos dias vecinita

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:03:

Nobody has "vueltos" for bill larger than $10.000, eventhough everybody pays in cash...

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:06:

lol jorgeg that's so true

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:07:

When everyone is partying their asses off on Christmas Eve instead of going to bed early.

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

wendell13 says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:08:

when you go to a mall and see women dressed like women

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:16:

When one day you can be tanning on a Caribbean beach, the next day you can be swimming in the Pacific Ocean, and the following day you can be on a boat on the mighty Amazon river.

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

El Polo says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:19:

When you hear VALLENATO A FULL MIERDA, while drinking whiskey with a plastic shot glass.

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:19:

your drunk off your ass at one of the hundreds of city festivals throughout colombia and you ask your self why are you going back to the states next week.

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:23:

when thye serve you Espaguettis con pollo with Mayo on top...

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:26:

or you get served rice along with spagetti..

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:30:

you buy buñuelos con queso for $1000, have a bite to discover it`s got no cheese, ask the kid who sold it to you for the cheese and the replies, "cheese is $500"
(it happened to me in Aracataca)

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:30:

your bored so you get in a car with a bunch of friends buy some aguardiente and head to la calera (are any place) turn the stereo up and start dancing.

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:34:

when you hear Vallenato, Tecno, and soft pop one after another in a radio station

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

azunoman says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:36:

when stray dogs act cool

when you are drinking shots out of a plastic shot glass with Colombian rum poured from a large juice box, Economico!

you still see TV/Radio repair shops

the Irish are still put in their place

when you hear techno music playing

Ready, Fire, Aim

rona says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:43:

. . . every other Monday is a holiday. St. - " fill in the blank " - Day.

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:43:

people are happy b/c is "Juernes"

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

Juanes says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:44:

you can say things which are not politically correct in the USA or england and no one give a flying farc...por ejemplo

oye gordito, apurrete, estamos esperando para salir - to the bus conductor

dame dos cigarillos por favor chino - to the person selling fags in the street

negrito. quiero un empenada de pollo y pasame un botella de aguila - to the waiter


it was really interesting to be the only gringo/mono/rubio in small colombian villages and towns and i dont mind people keep calling me blondie.whitey.skinny

http://www.travelblog.org/Bloggers/Juanes/

Simon says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:56:

When teens are not ashamed to be seen with their parents in public, and can even be seen holding hands with them or their grandparents without worrying about what other people may 'think'.

"You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do."---Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark)

Bill Turley says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:56:

When a person who studied only the absolute minimum English, failed Spanish 3 times becomes a National Authority on English, teaching over 2,500 English teachers.

Mr. Bill Somondoco

poco says on Mar 10, 2008, 12:57:

I think most of these items would apply to most if not all Latin Countries. Especially in most of the world where poverty is plentiful. Still good comments, especially if you KNEW you were in Colombia in the first place.

I put some thought into this and except for cell phone holders, I'd say noises, specifically gun shots vrs. fireworks. Where I live there are both.

Fireworks is probably 99% and noise can be heard for great distances.

I've become somewhat accustomed to the noise. Especially holdays. Night is different. I've often commented "fireworks" but there are a few cases when it was w/o a doubt pistol fire and I'd say those were gun shots. Morning comes and the chances are that someone somewhere no longer requires food.

"Violence is the first refuge of the incompetent" - Isaac Asimov

azunoman says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:00:

when you can get tortas de choclo everywhere

Ready, Fire, Aim

darkangel305 says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:03:

when your public transportation goes the wrong way on the high way and the wrong light color !!

dwr says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:08:

Your smokes only cost 1.25 a pack.

esanch36 says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:08:

when you walk into a trash can because of that mamacita with the big rump walked past you

The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings; the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal sharing of miseries

kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:12:

or when you are walking in the street and a Gamin shout at you ( in a gamin voice) uyy y adios mamacita quien mandooo

beisbollover says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:16:

When your at a red light and someone performs an amazing show for you in about a minute. I have seen fire jugglers, fire eaters, acrobats, dancers and puppeteers.

pedro says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:16:

When you go to introduce your extended family to somebody, and you honestly can't call half of them by their proper name:

"and this is Mono, here is Lobito, la Flaca..."

¡save pow wow!

pedro says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:22:

When you turn 15, you get given 1) permission to wear high heels and 2) a huge pair of plastic tits as a birthday present.

Recipe for falling flat on your face many times due to (2) while you learn to do (1).

¡save pow wow!

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:33:

When in a red light stop the car behind you honks you to continue forward

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

pedro says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:35:

There's a guy checking for weapons at the front door of your favourite drinking hole...

but once you've been there once or twice and they know your face, they just wave you inside without checking.

¡save pow wow!

buggy says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:45:

you see a paranoid as president

"Artículo 20 de la Constitución Política. Se garantiza a toda persona la libertad de expresar y difundir su pensamiento y opiniones,...No habrá censura."

rocinante says on Mar 10, 2008, 13:45:

YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN CLOMBIA WHEN

When you can jump on or off a moving bus

When you can wake up and hear "Bananaaaaaaao!"

When the sun rises and sets the same time every day and the clocks never change.

When on the streets you hear "mil mil mil" or "a la orden!"

When motorcyles riders cruise through hurricanes like it was no big deal

When peope are riding in the back of pick up trucks but their aunt is not their mother.

When a bullion cube, boilng water, chicken and an egg cures every ailment.

When the cost of a beer in the liquor store and the bar are the same.

When bombs go off all over town because of a goal instead of an attack

When no one in a bar is arguing about wether or not the president should be lynched.

When women over 40 dance

When women over 40 look under 30

When a full bus pulls over a for 5 minutes while the driver takes in a coffee during rush hour

When the call signal for a radio station (radio uno) chimes in 6 times in the middle of a song

When a big lunch at a resaurant costs 6mil pesos

When fried pork fat is seen as a staple insted of an artery clogging hear attack waiting to happen.

When the fired piece of chicharon with the least amount of meat is the desireable piece.

When a child of 9 years of age picks through the garbage and eats.

When everyone honks the second the light turns green

When women in high heels and smoking outfits sport a helmet and moto down the autopista

When you order a burger and load on 5 types of sauces, a mound of coleslaw, tomatoes, onions, salad and think you can somehow still taste the meat.

When your "Bottled water" comes in a bag

When people think meat cooked Medium Well meat is crudo

When children think they are rich because they are eating ice cream and could care less if they don't have an x-box

When a family of four can ride on a moto with no helmets.

When a "beer run" consists of your 8 year old nephew going two doors down to grab a six pack of Pilsen.

When people are pounding booze on the streets at 10AM

When you or anyone justs stops by without having to make an appointment a week in advance

When people are pounding 12 grapes in their mouth on New Years Eve

When the mail (official or DHL/FEDEX) is delivered by some kid on a moto.

When you hear your neighbor's music not because they are playing it too loud but because their house is missing a wall.

When you can buy cigarettes one a time from someone selling coffee from a vat strapped to their back.

When the entire city erupts at the stroke of midnight on Christmas Eve instead of sleeping

When day time TV shows on respectable networks think it's OK to show women parading around in lingere with close up camel toe and nipple shots. J Mario on RCN has the best job on the planet.

When no once cares if they ever have hot water.

When some neighborhood kid knocks on your door because he needs to get out your third floor window in order to hang a wire that will support Christmas lights over the street.

When you know where the bus is going because of the large print on the windshield

When the bus has a window etching of Jesus next to an etching of some puta with big tits.

When the water shuts of for a few hours once or twice a months but that's OK because there is a bucket of water under the wash sink.

When there is a bon fire in the street with a kettle of chicharon cooking on top of cinderblocks.

When you get a tamal or caldo con castilla delivered before the sun comes up.

When hot chicks put out.

When you can walk two doors down to a neighbor's house and buy food, booze and fereteria items instead of going to a store.

When you can have your watch battery changed at a street kiosk in 3 minutes for 2.000 pesos as opposed to having a jeweler send it out for three weeks and paying 20 bucks

When you can transform a rollerskate an empty pail and a cigarette lighter into a hotdog cart.

When crackers and sweet condensed milk are a perfect desert.

When you grab a chicken out of your backyard instead of running to the yard on the corner.

When the banks close in the middle of the day for 2+ hours.

When it comes time to leave the country 20 people accompany you to the airport to see you off.

When you neighbor comes to the party instead of calling the cops

When one of the hottest Vallenato bands will play your party for 800.000 pesos

When a sprinke of pepper is the hottest thing you ever tasted - like lava from a volcano.

When trucks drive by selling matresses, furniture, produce etc...

When your neighbor comes over to borrow a swig of rum instead of a cup of sugar.

When rice and beans is a prefect dinner

When you can buy a tank of gas because the truck came by ringing a bell.

When you can buy yesterday's newspaper (or the day's before) because the news stands keep these on hand.

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Peso 1400 by November" Feb 5, 2008

rocinante says on Mar 10, 2008, 14:30:

When this guy is your idol:

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Peso 1400 by November" Feb 5, 2008

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 14:52:

When you just arrive and your neighbors embrace you, give you a cup of lulo or ron, and start blasting the music on a Thursday morning....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 14:53:

When you can walk to your corner and ask the lady making fresh mini empanadas for a dozen....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 14:54:

When it's the middle of the day, and you know to have a pot ready for the guy that comes by selling fresh mazamorra.....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

azunoman says on Mar 10, 2008, 14:56:

when there is no junk mail

Ready, Fire, Aim

cali373 says on Mar 10, 2008, 15:25:

When you see ugly men with pretty girls.

Smile if you are a thinker!

ColombianoGringo says on Mar 10, 2008, 15:32:

"When you see ugly men with pretty girls."

Have you been to LA?

adrimm says on Mar 10, 2008, 15:33:

When you see women cover their faces against the evening air

When local tienda actually means walking distance (rather than driving distance)

When the eggs you buys are 90% likely to be free-range

When a woman can surprise people by knowing how to pop a car hood

When you can still easily find many domestic products (rather than made-in-china).

Morrongo says on Mar 10, 2008, 16:21:

When you watch a movie on Caracol and see 8mins of adverts to 7mins of the film

carolinda says on Mar 10, 2008, 16:29:

when the Colombian National Anthem plays on the radio everyday at 6 and 12

DodgerDogs says on Mar 10, 2008, 16:31:

You can buy cooking oil a ounce at a time.
You can buy 1 cigarette at a time.
You can buy 1 egg at a time.
You have to pay to park your car or moto.
You buy cell calls by the minute.
You are asked to pay for idiots to blow whistles at night.
You have to pay for photo copies of everything
You are always checking your cash for falzos.
You cant drive 20 miles without paying a toll.
You dread going to the beach , because the vendors stalk you.
You take cold showers and dream of hot water.
You hear a la orden and the word " pena " 10 x a day.
You see anything and everything for sale in the street
You read PBH and post on it to keep from forgetting ingles.

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.Martin Luther King:

adrimm says on Mar 10, 2008, 17:00:

I don't follow you on the pay-parking.......

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:02:

When a guy flirting asks, "estudias o trabajas?"

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:02:

... Or worse, "te estudio o te trabajo?"

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:03:

When your mom warns you about the danger of "el sereno"

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

adrienne79 says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:27:

When a man with three cell phones in his pocket will "go to the corner to make a call from minutos/llamadas.

Man Tequila says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:30:

Where people sing along happily to vallenato tunes playing in the distance

Until La Llorona gets them.

pues se me antoja que sus cantares son de una tierra desconocida, y yo le dije si a usted le inspira, saber la tierra de donde soy... con mucho gusto y a mucho honor...

adrienne79 says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:30:

When a case of imported beer cost less than a case of domestic (polar vs. aguila). Thanks Venezuela!

Lisa Zee says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:31:

This is funny, jajajajaja.

adrienne79 says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:33:

When a cup of coffee/soda is delivered to you while you are in a waiting room at the doctor's office.

DodgerDogs says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:35:

Those green cans of Polar beer are flat .

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.Martin Luther King:

Lisa Zee says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:35:

My favorite is when the maid tells you: "breakfast is ready"

"Su ropa esta aplanchada".

adrienne79 says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:45:

"Those green cans of Polar beer are flat "
Not sure which "green can" you are drinking but I asure you that none of the polar ice we have bought is flat.

DodgerDogs says on Mar 10, 2008, 19:59:

The ones I have bought come from Venezuela and sell for 700 pesos a can.
They do though have hot Calendarios !!!!!
www.noticiasdot.com/mas18/tag/chicas-polar/

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.Martin Luther King:

chrispej says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:35:

When you're having a conversation at a red light with the guy in the car next to you and the guy standing on the corner. Of course the guy running around selling peanuts has to put his two cents in.

Lisa Zee says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:40:

Cuando le tocan a uno la nalga LOL.

vicshere says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:45:

when your driving down the highway and see bunch of broken tree branches in the middle of the road and automatically slow down knowing there is some knid of danger ahead

listo

cali373 says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:50:

HEY, I use the "estudias o trabajas?" line. I was not aware that it was a line, JAJAJA

Smile if you are a thinker!

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:54:

When you go shopping in downtown at mid-day and there's a man carrying a tray of coffee for the afternoon tinto time....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:55:

When you have to time and eye ball the next car do dash across the street.....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:56:

When all the colombian men know how to dance!!!!

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:57:

When your corner ice cream shop carries ice cream with real fruit....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:57:

Colombiche, where are you... I know you have a long list of things we're missing....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 20:59:

When kids and adults still respect their elders and answer... Senora.....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 21:00:

When you know that there will be fresh arepas in the morning made by the house at the corner.....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

analyzethis1 says on Mar 10, 2008, 21:24:

msaucey: I've got the perfect photo to accompany one of your lines. I'm just doing some editing...stay tuned!

There are two kinds of gratitude: The sudden kind we feel for what we receive, and the larger kind we feel for what we give. E.A. Robinson

msaucey says on Mar 10, 2008, 21:27:

Hey stranger.... we need to touchbase.... Okay...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

Robert Jorge says on Mar 10, 2008, 21:50:

When you can buy the eggs, one egg at a time - and they are still wholesome, even though they haven't been refrigerated and are 2 weeks old. (For some reason in the US, eggs have to be refrigerated and still have a shelf life half that of Colombian eggs.)

Rocinante - great response. With permission, I am going to copy that.

SiV says on Mar 10, 2008, 22:38:

When the 500m walk home from the shop takes 3 hours 'cos you have a quick chat with the neighbours.

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. Mahatma Gandhi

RobMiami says on Mar 10, 2008, 23:32:

When every light bulb is fully exposed and blinding

RobMiami says on Mar 10, 2008, 23:33:

When the people don't know how to use and elevator when in the lobby press down because they want the elevator to come "down" and get them and then jump in and take the ride into the basement just for kicks

Rubito says on Mar 11, 2008, 00:37:

When in the residential building you are staying, there are 2 internet cafes, 2 restaurants, a physiotherapist, a bootleg dentist, a daycare, a clothing "store" and 3 puteaderos!

Actually that could be the Bronx or Brooklyn too :P

---Violence is the price of freedom.---

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 11, 2008, 05:13:

when watching TV at 7 PM "El minuto de Dios " comes on

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

elmodefoque says on Mar 11, 2008, 06:53:

when young hot latin broads in NYC don't give your pasty white ass the time of fokin day, all of the sudden you find yourself in Medellin, Cali and Bogota getting chased by young hot cachacas.
welcome to colombia

thank you!

webmanco says on Mar 11, 2008, 07:07:

In special in Bogotá, when you can find dishes from all corners of Colombia, buñuelos, tamales tolimenses, santandereanos, tamales de pipipan, insulsos, caramiñola, arepa de huevo, bandeja paisa, torta de banano, arepa de chocolo, arepa de maiz pelao, arepa de maiz porva, orejuelas de maiz, sancocho de pezcado, sanchocho de gallina, ñame, borojo, chontaduro, sopa de coli, caldo de pajarilla, caldo de ministro, viudo de pezcado, changua, masato, avena caleña, avena tolimense, torta de pionono, cucas cuadradas de Hobo, hormigas culonas, mazamorra paisa, mantecadas, carne llanera, cocido boyacense, pelanga, chocoramo, bombon bum, chocolatinas jet, ponque ramo, imperiales, bocadillos, natilla, arroz con leche.

Also when you find cousine from all over the world, only in Bogotá

When one day there is a huge march on carrera 7ma against all types of crimes, and the next day same carrera 7ma is full with artists from all over the world inagurating Festival Iberoamericano de Teatro, and then againg next day on Friday there is "El Septimazo" Bogotá never a dull day.

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

Juanes says on Mar 11, 2008, 09:26:

great post rocinante, supongo te has escribido todos las cosas sobre la vida en locombia...

for me.......AL LA ORDEN o SIEMPRE A LA ORDEN

i heard this absolutamente todos los lugares en colombia from the north to south and even in backward leticia.....no where else until i arrived from panama city had i heard this expression before. even when i left for argentina it was so nice para escuchar mis colombianos siempre al orden patron/mono/...

this is when i know i have arrived back in colombia and it was right on cue when i got back through ecuador into ipiales.

http://www.travelblog.org/Bloggers/Juanes/

Juanes says on Mar 11, 2008, 09:40:

every bus journey there is somebody selling something from clothes pegs to chewing gum

every time the bus stops you are amnushed by people selling gaseosas and dry crisps in see through packets

every meal comes with rice and salad even when you dont order it

every town or small village has someone with a wooden box around their neck selling individual cigarettes, chicles, dulces,etc....and often not with a flask of cafecito under his arm with mini cups.....the most prepared have pintado tambien.

every bus journey is like driving with the dukes of hazzard

there are no official bus stops as such on highways, interstates , local roads,

postobon softdrinks (my favourite cos it sponsors my atletico nacional) are much more popular and readily available the further you get away from the more westernised bogota o cartagena.

every bus journey involves seeing a mountain or cordillera

80's music is the most widely heard music after the vallenato, salsa, cumbia,etc

every costena colombiano speaks worst/ harder to understand spanish than the interior

every bus has some kind of religious saying or motive on it somewhere....por ejemplo...
JESUS ES MI SENOR
JESUS VIVES
JESUS ES MI SAVIOUR

http://www.travelblog.org/Bloggers/Juanes/

buggy says on Mar 11, 2008, 10:39:

when you see bloody cadavers at the first page of the newspapers

"Artículo 20 de la Constitución Política. Se garantiza a toda persona la libertad de expresar y difundir su pensamiento y opiniones,...No habrá censura."

msaucey says on Mar 11, 2008, 10:52:

Thanks for the pessimistic perspective buggy.... Perfect way to ruin a GREAT thread... mendigo...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 11, 2008, 10:55:

oh....yes...
when you see a movie being advertized for Sunday morning matiné (for kids)
"Fuerte Apache...tortura, violaciones, mutilaciones al granel..."

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 11, 2008, 10:56:

Msaucey....I 'm sorry but there is a downside to it too, especially for people who are not used to the level of violence and have not become immune to it yet.

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

webmanco says on Mar 11, 2008, 10:56:

Msaucey just look at is with a sarcastic humor Buggy comment

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 11, 2008, 11:00:

buggy read El Espacio hehehe,

msaucey says on Mar 11, 2008, 11:06:

Desi, but in Colombia, a country that has had more bloodshed than any country should and still does... It's not a surprise to colombians to open up the newspaper and see a story of a dead MoFo and then move on to the next article... it's a society that has grown numb to the pain, sadly, but for a society that has grown up with it, it's normal news... Same with morning movies... Heck if the parent's don't see an issue with their children watching those movies in the morning, why does the movie theatre have to?...

Looking at it from an outside perspective, a lot of things can be looked down upon in Colombia, but in Colombia, it's not...

My comment was primarily based on the fact that pretty much every response on this thread has been light hearted and with a positive true feeling of "you know you're in colombia when..." ending on a positive note.... So, much for the good natured fun...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

SiV says on Mar 11, 2008, 11:07:

When a big explosion goes off and nobody gives it a second thought.

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. Mahatma Gandhi

mranderson says on Mar 11, 2008, 11:13:

When someone pops a balloon in a buisness and everybody jumps as if it were a bomb.

Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 11, 2008, 12:17:

When you try to cross a street at a zebra crossing or traffic light and the cars speed up instead of slowing down...and you hear the trumpets of a pasodoble somewhere in the back of your mind....

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Colombiche says on Mar 11, 2008, 13:55:

When you wake up at 6 am to a guy walking down the street screaming: "Se arreglan licuadoras y pitadoras.... tambien vendo sombrillas... cachetoncitas y muy buenas"..

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

Colombiche says on Mar 11, 2008, 13:58:

When I have the following conversation on the street:

Gamincito: Mona, una monedita......
Yo: (metiendome la mano al bolsillo) Vea, no tengo sino 200 pesos
Gamincito: Ahhh no, mona como asi... deme una de quinini.
Yo: Chino hijuemadre.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:08:

Msaucey, I know...this was supposed to be a feel-good thread, unfortunately all that blood in the front pages of the Colombian newspapers have made me feel not so good about Colombia these days...

but keep the funny, the kafkan, the magic moments coming....

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Colombiche says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:11:

Ultimamente estamos como muy intensos.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:13:

Intensos? That's an understatement....

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Colombiche says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:15:

Mamones?

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

Desideria (Moderator) says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:17:

I don't know....alien perhaps?

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." —Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Colombiche says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:21:

It was the rums, the caribbean breeze and the fact that the summit took place in the city I was in.... que se yo, I can be brutal sometimes LOL.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

msaucey says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:40:

Desi, I get your point... I'm in the L.A. area...Opening up the L.A. Times this morning... Our front page today has a 17 year old football players funeral no gory pictures, but pics of the coffin... I find it everywhere, not just in Colombia... Imagine what the Iraqi, Israeli, Darfur, etc... newspapers look like today...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

msaucey says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:44:

You know you're in colombia when.... your mani and pedi cost 10,000 COP...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

rocinante says on Mar 11, 2008, 14:45:

And your mani pedi is a house call.

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Peso 1400 by November" Feb 5, 2008

SiV says on Mar 11, 2008, 16:16:

When the person in front takes 10 minutes to get their money out of the ATM.

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. Mahatma Gandhi

azunoman says on Mar 11, 2008, 17:03:

at lunch you ask to see the menu (I a gringo) and they serve you whats on todays menu!

oh..and that a bar / eatery named the Berlin Bar has no German food whatsoever. :)

Ready, Fire, Aim

msaucey says on Mar 11, 2008, 17:07:

you ask for a soda and you get a bretana...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

mranderson says on Mar 11, 2008, 17:14:

when the person in front of you at the atm has 3 friends pop out of nowhere and they all conviently need to use the atm. same at the grocery store.

podborski says on Mar 11, 2008, 17:21:

you invite three girls out for drinks, six show up, they are all 'cousins', you stay out all night drinking rum and dancing to vallenato, and it still only costs you a hundred bucks.

mranderson says on Mar 11, 2008, 17:25:

haha and when you invite a girl out on the first date after just meeting her and she shows up for dinner with her mother, sister, and brother.

Juanes says on Mar 11, 2008, 18:16:

whats a cadaver when its at home ?..........quote ' when u see bloody cadavers on first page of paper'''

some sort of hombre que tiene mucho suerte con las chiquitas ? like cad

http://www.travelblog.org/Bloggers/Juanes/

jorgegdiaz says on Mar 11, 2008, 18:58:

...after the second date you meet parents, sisters, brothers, cousins, uncles, nephews, grandparents, nieces, brothers in law, sisters in law, godfather, godmother, family doctor, mailman, farmacist, greatgranparents, and everyone in a 2 mile radius of her house...

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

robi666 says on Mar 11, 2008, 19:03:

When a girl, that just gave her phone number to you, asks yours, and you tell her that you cannot with a nice excuse and so it is better that you'll call her... and she doesn't tell you to fuck off.

"I am a citizen of the most beautiful nation on earth. A nation whose laws are harsh yet simple, a nation that never cheats, which is immense and without borders, where life is lived in the present."

robi666 says on Mar 11, 2008, 19:06:

When, whatever you've done, you can always blame it on "la Brujeria".

"I am a citizen of the most beautiful nation on earth. A nation whose laws are harsh yet simple, a nation that never cheats, which is immense and without borders, where life is lived in the present."

webmanco says on Mar 12, 2008, 04:33:

Msauce
you ask for a soda and you get a bretana...


When you get what you ask for. :-) ...........and then some more.

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

CatGirl says on Mar 12, 2008, 08:39:

Froggy: spewed "when you see ****** ******* at the first page of the newspapers"

Tejas? Do you have that $10 Laser you mentioned in you recent post in off topic? Can I borrow it....I hear that it can effect vision if pointed directly into the eye...I think it's time for Froggy's yearly Vet visit. Probably due for an eye exam....

ooops! ....Did I say that?

analyzethis1 says on Mar 12, 2008, 10:08:

kat wrote: "when someone outside is shouting, Buñuelos, tamales, envueltos de mazorca"
msaucey wrote: "When it's the middle of the day, and you know to have a pot ready for the guy that comes by selling fresh mazamorra....."

Thanks for the captioning gals! I was officially delegated the task to run outside in whatever I was wearing. For me...only in Colombia!

There are two kinds of gratitude: The sudden kind we feel for what we receive, and the larger kind we feel for what we give. E.A. Robinson

msaucey says on Mar 12, 2008, 10:52:

Analyzethis.... I'm sure the vendors made sure to stop by more then once on your block, and timed it to the minute you were getting ready to jump in the shower.... Just in case... =)

You know you're in colombia when you can get fresh baked bread delivered to your door and it's still warm....

When you're driving and hit a large pothole that ruins the gear box, but you continue on your trip because you're not going to be using that pesky reverse gear anytime soon....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

durito says on Mar 12, 2008, 10:57:

"When the person in front takes 10 minutes to get their money out of the ATM."

I was gonna start a thread about this. What on earth are they all doing in there?

analyzethis1 says on Mar 12, 2008, 11:02:

Ah that's too funny! If one wants to sum up their trip to Colombia, just refer to this post!!! I hope more comments will come b/c I've been stealing some and using them to caption my photos! I wouldn't be able to say it any better!

BTW, is it only in Colombia where some pubic washrooms don't have toilet seats? I don't remember seeing such when I travelled in other countries.

There are two kinds of gratitude: The sudden kind we feel for what we receive, and the larger kind we feel for what we give. E.A. Robinson

mranderson says on Mar 12, 2008, 11:03:

when you drive into a large pothole that swallows up the tire and 5 people without even thinking run over and pick the car up out of the pothole. Driver drives on like nothing ever happened.

durito says on Mar 12, 2008, 11:11:

"BTW, is it only in Colombia where some pubic washrooms don't have toilet seats? I don't remember seeing such when I travelled in other countries."

They are more prevalent in Colombia than they are in Central America or Ecuador, Peru, or Bolvia

mranderson says on Mar 12, 2008, 11:15:

or toilet paper. Funny, you have to pay for public restrooms everywhere but what do they give you? A few squares.

msaucey says on Mar 12, 2008, 11:45:

Mr A...

You're supposed to say...

You know you're in Colombia when you pay 500 pesos for 4 squares of toilet paper....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

Lisa Zee says on Mar 12, 2008, 17:20:

You know you are in Colombia when a man passes you driving at 100 kilometer an hour, scrape your car, then you chase them and they pull a gun on you out of the window, you go complain and give a 'denucia' at the police with the license plate #, and they tell you " well, did anybody die?" ( that happened to my husband and I in the late 80`s) I am sure now it is different.

NataliaV says on Mar 12, 2008, 18:15:

when you can drink a beer while walking around the mall..

SiV says on Mar 12, 2008, 18:23:

When you see a 70-year-old homeless woman begging, and nobody looks at her twice? Or is that not happy-happy enough for the smiley crew?

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. Mahatma Gandhi

NataliaV says on Mar 12, 2008, 18:27:

when your family rents a 27 passenger bus to pick you up from the airport...

NataliaV says on Mar 12, 2008, 18:29:

when your normal 20 minute shower in the states is cut to the fastest 2 minute shower ever!

NataliaV says on Mar 12, 2008, 18:32:

when you are so full from eating, but people force you to eat more by putting 1 more arepa or 2 more pieces of pan on your plate and then ask why you don't want more......have to eat more!!!

Robert Jorge says on Mar 12, 2008, 21:01:

When you are stopped at a red light at a major traffic intersection and a guy places candy and porn on your lap. Then, he comes to pick it back up 30 seconds later.

Juanes says on Mar 13, 2008, 04:53:

jaja jorge....i forgot about that when people leave stuff with you and then take it back...they do that a lot when i bus travelled around the country....

when.........your just about to start your long bus journey and are looking forward to seeing a stephen seagal movie through the long and winding mountain roads when someone stands up in front of all the passengers and shouts an excellent sales presentation, then proceeds to leave with every passenger with...

comic books
jewellry
medecinas
pens

http://www.travelblog.org/Bloggers/Juanes/

Juanes says on Mar 13, 2008, 04:56:

when..........you can buy one cigarette or chicle from the old guy in the shady plaza carrying his flasks of pintado instead of a whole packet like you have to in europe.

http://www.travelblog.org/Bloggers/Juanes/

Juanes says on Mar 13, 2008, 05:02:

when......even the mujeres selling empenadas, maracuya/zapote/lulo fruit drinks, and in the tiendas in remote places like ipiales, neiva, san cipriano, cucuta, guatape, leticia are so much hotter than the girls who work in the high class department stores here in london or frequent central london pubs and clubs.

http://www.travelblog.org/Bloggers/Juanes/

tejasmarcos says on Mar 13, 2008, 14:11:

when a pedestrian baracade is frikin yellow tape (avenida poblado & las balsos - road construction).

scary! i run through those sections when i get the chance...

it is a bipolar town in mde. some things amaze me and then again some things frikin amaze me. up is down, down is up - yet everybody is still smilin!

god is in your head

El Polo says on Mar 17, 2008, 10:18:

I know im in Colombia when
- The Rooster in my house wakes me up at 5:30 am the first night and first night only, any other day I am too drunk to notice
- When the house Loro/Parrot can say HP clearly & tells the dog (jacinto) to STFU when he is barking too much
- When the mango tree across the street has not one mango on it
- when the "blind" guy can make it from his house all the way to a bar by the plaza, and order the most current chit, as if he can see the fokin menu (all by himself).
- When it is extremely hot around noon, and everywhere you go they are serving STEAMING hot soup....

Monpirri says on Mar 17, 2008, 10:36:

You know your in Colombia when the food tastes so damn good.

Annette Taddeo for US Congress 2008

durito says on Mar 17, 2008, 10:50:

I have to give my finger print to get some papers delivered.

rocinante says on Mar 17, 2008, 12:31:

When you have to guess if you can cross the street because the traffic lights are situated so that pedestrians cannot see them.

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Peso 1400 by November" Feb 5, 2008

rocinante says on Mar 17, 2008, 12:32:

When your business of carting around 8 multi colored thermoses is in danger from the guy who is carting around 14.

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Peso 1400 by November" Feb 5, 2008

beisbollover says on Mar 17, 2008, 12:34:

When you wait for the red light to turn yellow and then turn green...instead of just turning green. Any wonder why there are so many car accidents in Bogota? If your trying to speed up to make it before the light turns red, and someone is speeding up because they see the red is going to turn green.....BANG.

rocinante says on Mar 17, 2008, 12:35:

You know you are in Colombia where it's still legal to make a "Right Turn on Gringo"

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Peso 1400 by November" Feb 5, 2008

msaucey says on Mar 17, 2008, 12:48:

Roci... LOL... "Grin""GO"

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

jonas says on Mar 17, 2008, 14:45:

You know you are in Colombia when people in the bus or even better Transmilenio stand for at least 30 seconds in front of their seat before actually sitting down.

What I have, I do not want to lose, but Where I am I do not want to stay, but those I love, I do not want to leave, but those I know I no longer want to see, but Where I die, I do not want to go;I want to stay where I have never been

analyzethis1 says on Mar 17, 2008, 16:52:

I know I'm eating Colombian food when my rice is perfectly shaped like an upside down grapefruit. (I now serve my guests this way, too.) It is so easy to do and it presents like a pro chef.

There are two kinds of gratitude: The sudden kind we feel for what we receive, and the larger kind we feel for what we give. E.A. Robinson

Monpirri says on Mar 17, 2008, 17:56:

"I know I'm eating Colombian food when my rice is perfectly shaped like an upside down grapefruit" jajaja I never heard that before, now you are talking chef with a discriminating taste.
That's a real good one.

Annette Taddeo for US Congress 2008

Lisa Zee says on Mar 17, 2008, 19:02:

jonas: LOL, LOl to let it cool off! jajajajajaja!

tejasmarcos says on Mar 17, 2008, 19:04:

when street lights are "optional".

god is in your head

azunoman says on Mar 18, 2008, 12:26:

when the largest Sombrero at the souvenir shop at el Penol is to small for my western head

Ready, Fire, Aim

kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 18, 2008, 12:27:

entoces eres cabezon... azunoman :)))

azunoman says on Mar 18, 2008, 12:40:

kat1 said "entoces eres cabezon... azunoman :)))"

IM'ed my wife to find out what it meant...:))))

Si, I can barely get my head through a Colombian made t-shirt

:))))))))

Ready, Fire, Aim

Man Tequila says on Mar 18, 2008, 13:06:

At least he's not a llorón too. ;)

pues se me antoja que sus cantares son de una tierra desconocida, y yo le dije si a usted le inspira, saber la tierra de donde soy... con mucho gusto y a mucho honor...

kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 18, 2008, 13:29:

Imaging Lloron y cabezon......

azunoman says on Mar 18, 2008, 13:38:

ok...I got a big head but only a medium in the US. My wife says I am not a cry baby or make fun of someone crying (depends on which xlation she gave me).. but she says that I am her big baby....so all is right with the world...

Ready, Fire, Aim

kat1 (Moderator) says on Mar 18, 2008, 13:40:

You are medium in the USA?!!!!! GEZZZ would like a picture of the large :)))

azunoman says on Mar 18, 2008, 13:51:

kat1 says "You are medium in the USA?!!!!! GEZZZ would like a picture of the large :)))"

Ready, Fire, Aim

webmanco says on Mar 19, 2008, 09:39:

When weird names are given to Viaductos, like La Estampilla and la Estampillita

http://www.lapatria.com/Noticias/ver_noticia.aspx?CODNOT=27087&CODSEC=...


http://www.autopistasdelcafe.com/Index.asp
Nice background song.


Bad background song

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

webmanco says on Mar 21, 2008, 07:37:

Cuando si hay comida para cuatro entonces para cinco y seis y siete ......

Si hay espacio para cuatro en una moto siempre habrá espacio para otro cristiano.

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

Lisa Zee says on Mar 21, 2008, 10:25:

When you don`t have to announce ahead of time you are visiting, and they welcome you anytime.

MaFe says on Mar 21, 2008, 22:09:

"You know your in Colombia when the food tastes so damn good."

Oh Monpirri!! You are so right!! The food is so damn good, and you don't gain any pounds, and actually loose pounds!! Mmmmm Colombian food!!

"No comment" is a splendid expression. I am using it again and again." -Winston Churchill

DodgerDogs says on Mar 21, 2008, 22:20:

I ride only in the barrios here with 6 and 7 all the time, when I shuttle kids to the parks.

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.Martin Luther King:

goin_south says on Mar 21, 2008, 22:29:

jejej... MaFe...
that is: You Know You are in South Louisiana when
the Food tastes SO... DAMN.. GOOD!
...
Now... for some UNEXPLAINED REASON...
(probably,... superstition... for ALL!)... yes!
YES..... YOU CAN EAT ALL YOU CAN EAT WHILE IN COLOMBIA
AND WAKE UP THE NEXT MORNING..
AND.. the scales have dropped.
(but, don't leave the country! jjeje...
YOUR METABOLISM CHANGES IMMEDIATELY.)

why can't the freakin Chung King Chinese just LEAVE THE FREAKN DOLLY LLAMA and Tibet ... ALONE!

MaFe says on Mar 21, 2008, 22:33:

GS...you are so right...when I am in Colombia I eat nonstop and come back always 5 pounds lighter....but put those damn 5 pounds on in 2 days being home!!

Now I am craving Colombian food...=(

My sister has that "I am Colombian and never gain a pound body" here and in Colombia, so when we were down there and back in the states I asked her if her metabolism was faster in Colombia- she looked at me like I was from another world..clueless...damn skinny girls!

"No comment" is a splendid expression. I am using it again and again." -Winston Churchill

goin_south says on Mar 21, 2008, 22:34:

I guess it's a sign... WE SHOULD STAY IN COLOMBIA... eh, MaFe?

why can't the freakin Chung King Chinese just LEAVE THE FREAKN DOLLY LLAMA and Tibet ... ALONE!

MaFe says on Mar 21, 2008, 22:35:

GS, I should but I could never survive there...too many things I love and disagree with...BUT I could give it a try!! I would be almost invisble like most girls there!! Ja!

"No comment" is a splendid expression. I am using it again and again." -Winston Churchill