What do Colombian broads find charming?

oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:13:

elmo..silly boy.. you shudda shown them the missionary one.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:14:

Maybe they got jelous about t Maybe they got jealous about the burra, come on Elmo if you try to charm a girl don't flaunt the picture of your ex girlfriend, we don't like it right!!!

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utopiacowboy says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:15:

They were just jealous the burra was getting it and they weren't.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:20:

next time send a 1950's picture of a convertible ;)

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Albatross says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:21:

Confucius say... Charm is overrated, just remember the ancient Chinese proverb:

"Candy's dandy, but liquor's quicker"

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:21:

also... more of them might like to be with you, if you gain about 150 pounds, lose your hair, and some of your back teeth.
worked for the oldgringo.

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elmodefoque says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:24:

Should I apologize to them? I can’t imagine Colombian broads actually getting jealous over my ex lovers many, many moons ago, I’ve not even reach puberty then,

OG, ever since my young cachaca dumped me, I’ve become a drunk, but a happy drunk!

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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Miguel says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:27:

Yet...a happy drunk, without bite marks and broken lamps all over the place.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:28:

We get jealous Elmo, remember donde hubo fuego cenizas quedan ;)

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elmodefoque says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:36:

Al, my number one rule when dating. The broad has to drink and she has to drink as much or more than me, cause that’s the only way I’m gonna get her naked in bed.
Gringas used to that to me all the time, get me drunk and all drugged up so they could have their way with me.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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elmodefoque says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:38:

kat mi amor, que ceniza ni que perro muerto, i was shooting blanks.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:46:

and about the broken lamps... and the scratches, and the doors slammed,
and all the rest, is it a costena thing, or a colombian thing, or a latina thing? the oldone knows it's not a universal feminine thing.
such behavior is not experienced in marcopololandia.

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Rubiazo says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:54:

For some reason Elmo seems to be a violent crazy bitch magnet! I've never had anything like that happen to me, not even in all my years banging groupies on the road with bands! I guess he's lucky his girl didn't bite his balls off like she wanted to do and only almost bit his forearm in two!

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Miguel says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:56:

Oye elmodofoque If the peso continues to sink like a piragua en el rio Magdalena, you will be a very charming corroncho.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 10:58:

lol Miguel, that's true ;)

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Colombiche says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:02:

Elmodefoque You are underestimating your own charm. Your self deprecating humor is a great asset.



Who cares if you are getting old? There are plenty of girls in their 20's who think older men are sexy (trust me on that). As long as you still have your own teeth, don't wear depends and take a daily shower (so you don't smell like a sweaty farm goat), you will be game. Wear lots of cologne and act like you are an important b'ness man.

You might want to grow a beer belly too, that can be a plus.

Tell them you had intentions of marrying the burrita so you don't come across as a player.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Colombiche says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:09:

I forgot a very important point If you have ear hair trim it, nose hair might work if you are an important writer like Gabo.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:09:

CB.. the oldgringo is really flattered by your accurate portrayal,
not to mention the old counsellor certificate hanging on the wall.
and sometimes... the lab coat.

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webmanco says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:10:

Elmo got himself a good "asesor de imagen"

...A yo, déjenme queto y no me jodan má! ...

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miamimike says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:11:

Elmo, You Forgot The Main Chick Magnet- Ha! Ha! You should have had a few Ben Franklin 100 Dollar Bills $$$ taped to your Forehead and the other "Head" also -these Ben $$$ open all the Doors! HA HA

My Avatar-- Sarah Palin Says " "You know the difference between a pit bull and a hockey mom?? Lipstick!" Now on a Short Verbal Tether by the Honorable John McCain

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Colombiche says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:13:

That goes right under "Act like you are an important b-ness man".

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:19:

the oldgringo never could afford those things.... just expose your new belly,
and soon enough..
one will be charmed.

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z_gringo says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:25:

Charming What do Colombian broads find charming?

Mostly just calling them broads. They love that kind of thing.


I used to have this “charm” thing coming outta my a-s.

You sound charming.

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elmodefoque says on Jun 9, 2006, 11:49:

I’ve never been called charming, especially here in NYC. Most times I was just a lying cheating dog to most gringas and Puerto Ricans. Bill Clinton is a charming guy; I’m more the MALPARIO type. I was surprised a few years ago when my ex told me that her female relatives, and in all places Medellin, found me extremely charming. Don’t know if it had to do with the huge bulge in my pants, no, is not what you’re thinking, I was carrying a big wad of 20 mil peso bills. They all listened to me intensely hanging to every word and laughing at every stupid shit I was saying. Maybe they found my heavy corroncho accent very amusing. All I know is that from that moment on, I liked being charming.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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Albatross says on Jun 9, 2006, 12:00:

. So the fragrance of a perspiring farm goat is unattractive to women ?

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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Rubiazo says on Jun 9, 2006, 12:02:

In Spanish 'modefoque' is 'hijueputa' y ya!

I've had people like that find me charming too. Usually right after they find me charming, they start talking about how they are personally going to change the world, right after their pedicure, and OH don't forget to stop at crepes and waffles for some sushi I JUST LOVE THAT PLACE AND OH ARE YOU IN A BAND IM IN A BAND TOO THEY ALWAYS TOLD ME I WAS MUSICALLY INCLINED I LOVE GETTING UP AT KARAOKE THE MORE YOU DRINK THE BETTER I SOUND HAHAHAH IM GOING TO GET A RECORD DEAL RIGHT AFTER I FINISH MY PHD BTW COULD YOU LEND ME 100k TILL NEXT WEEK?

what were we talking about again?

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Colombiche says on Jun 9, 2006, 12:05:

Rubiazo We were talking about sweaty goats.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Albatross says on Jun 9, 2006, 12:10:

Rube, Me Too I've had people like that find me charming too. Usually right after they find me charming, they ask for the money.

P.S. I love the smell of sweaty goats in the morning...

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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elmodefoque says on Jun 9, 2006, 12:18:

I ‘m glad you guys find the smell of sweaty goats disgusting. Back in my Wayuu village in La Guajira I had to share my bed with sweaty goats. Why you ask? Leaving your goats out in the field at night is an invitation for modefoques to come and steal them
Anyways, my grandfather put me in charge of 3 goats and we all slept together. Do you know those goats had the audacity to complain about my smell. They spent the entire night biting and pulling me, trying to get me outta my own hut.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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Colombiche says on Jun 9, 2006, 12:19:

P.S. I love the smell of swea P.S. I love the smell of sweaty goats in the morning...

You often wake up starring into the sleepy eyes of goat?

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:27:

Elmo would smell like a sweaty farm donkey jjijij

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:32:

all born in 1967 or 1979 are goats... and if your colombiana is born in the year of the goat,...
watch out,..like their kind, they like to hop over to the other side of the fence, where the grass looks greener.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:35:

jeje Oldgringo I already did and the grass was way greener than I expected

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toneloc24 says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:39:

Elmo The peso is plunging now.

Vamos a la currumba pa el 4 de julio. Siempre hay tres mas nenas. Ya tengo mi tiquete de avianca. Me llamas.

"Don't tase me, bro!!!!"

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:41:

and probably will again... welsh grass is green, but look!! over here!!!

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:46:

uhmm SHOW ME OLD GRINGO!!!!!!

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:50:

that damm elmo .. he won't post the foto to prove oldgringos' charm.

you may just have to show up at the jak, where your
throne will be waiting on the command bridge,and see
for yourself the array of charms before you.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 13:54:

I'm sure you got a lot of charm OG ;)

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:04:

yeah,..right... that must be why they all say: "you ruined my life!!!"

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:18:

I still think you are charming OG ;) and I am on your party boat

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Rubiazo says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:19:

We don't have goats here But I know a sweaty skinny hairy old Puerto Rican guy named Angel that can fill in in a pinch :)

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utopiacowboy says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:35:

Colombiche wrote: "There are plenty of girls in their 20's who think older men are sexy (trust me on that). As long as you still have your own teeth, don't wear depends and take a daily shower (so you don't smell like a sweaty farm goat), you will be game. Wear lots of cologne and act like you are an important b'ness man."

I think she wants you, dude.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:38:

yipeeee!!!! the oldgringo wins faire ladys' heart!!!

not you, corronchelmo,..
you are too close to home for the goat-girl.

not you cowboy, you grovelling two-timer.

it is the oldgringo, who knows the ways to the faire lady.

hope la commandante doesn't see this....hehehehe.

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:40:

colombiche... sorry,..
you'll have to take a number.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:42:

you won my heart OG you are MY PRINCE CHARMING ;)

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Colombiche says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:44:

Sorry OG I think UC was saying that I want Elmo....

UC, who is it that I want so badly?

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:54:

gosh...
either way...
this is shaping up to be a very nice party.
unfortunately, the cowboy will be left grovelling,
and while in canada, this works fine, in colombia, no creo.

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:54:

I already got my rich papi jijiji

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utopiacowboy says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:57:

Elmo, por supuesto! Not that I blame you. I bet he's a helluva lot of fun even with his pants on.

Kat and Colombiche are two of the hottest Colombiana mamacitas around. It's a mystery to me why they are even allowed to roam the earth loose on their hind legs. I'd give my left huevo for either one of them.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 14:57:

hey el magoo malo did you have a pig fly over YOUR house,
and drop a bag of diamonds??

that's what happened to the oldgringo, and now look,
all the babes want some of my charms.

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 15:00:

you see... grovelling is different than pitiful.

unless it's pitiful grovelling.

like the last one, when the two-timer tried to play both sides.

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utopiacowboy says on Jun 9, 2006, 15:11:

The truth be told, I could not care less if I ever see either one of them in person. I never expect to meet them and I don't care if I do. However for internet purposes, i.e. fantasy, I am a pitiful groveller.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 15:11:

this guy is in the lead... for the prize for most obnoxious.

the tiger waits.

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 15:12:

not you cowboy.. you are NOT in the running for this prize.

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oldbongo says on Jun 9, 2006, 15:24:

exactly cowboy... if you are going to grovel here, at least try to approach the standard set by elmo. if you can't do that,
maybe try another tack. you could try being inane again, or, you could just accept rejection gracefully.....
who knows, maybe a pig will fly over YOUR house,
and drop a bag of diamonds.

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Miguel says on Jun 9, 2006, 15:51:

Uff.. Somebody call la farc, el ejercito, los paracos o los narcos...o los "moderators"..."El Mago Malo" necesita la corbata colombiano y muy pronto.

This prick needs to be 86'ed right now.

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johna says on Jun 9, 2006, 17:10:

I think he just was... later "conservative bad boy". Just another fine example of a Republican party member, huh MC?

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utopiacowboy says on Jun 9, 2006, 21:33:

Who could possibly attain Elmo's standard of grovelling? He's truly world class. I've got a long way to grovel before I can grovel like him.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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utopiacowboy says on Jun 9, 2006, 21:51:

I can see the soles of his shoes? Wouldn't I be coming up out of his throat if I was that far up his ass?

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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