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TRIP REPORT..........MEDELLIN TO VENEZUELA.........

Well..............not quite in Venezuela yet, but I can see it from my hotel room in Cucuta.

The bike has to be taken out of Colombia as the permit expires today. So, a couple of days in Venezuela, and then back in again, with a new permit. Does'nt seem like nine months has passed since I first took it in. Supposed to get three months on entry, and then a further three months extension from DIAN in Medellin. When I went for the extension, they made a little mistake, and gave me an additional six months, instead of three. But, this time, I need to exit the country.

I left on Thursday afternoon. The six hour ride from Medellin to Bucaramanga took me 9 hours, as I like to take my time and stop frequently. I like to stop for a beer every 20 miles or so, and the dog needs to piss. The scenery from Barbosa to Cisneros is stunning. On thursday, the late afternoon sun was shining in such a way, as to make the colours of the green mountainside appear many shades of spectacular greens.

On arrival in Cisneros I stop for a pizza and a couple of beers in a little restaurant I have eaten in before. Really good pizza. The town of Cisneros and I, have a little history. Last time I was there, I stayed overnight in a small hotel. After checking in, the lady brought me to a secured parking garage a few blocks away. She walked, as I followed her on the bike. It was dark, and I did'nt see the enormous speed bump, which tore a nice hole into the engine block. Oil splattered all over the place. Poor bike. But, next morning, the local all purpose mechanic, had the machine welded back together again, and as good as new. Total cost, $100.

On this trip, Cisneros had something different planned for me. After the Pizza and 4 beers I depart Cisneros in the direction of Bucaramanga. Just before you get out of the town there is a railroad crossing. No big deal, you just need to be a little carefull getting over the tracks. The CD player was blasting out a nice Irish rebel song as I hit the first track. Did'nt quite have the correct angle, so, the front wheel decided it was'nt going to bother going to Bucaramanga. Instead, the bike, with the dog aboard, chose to go back to Medellin as I continued airborne and alone, in the direction of Venezuela. After picking myself up of the Cisneros tarmac, with the help of some local folks, I observed for the first time, the expression on a dog's face when it is laughing.

The beauty of the countryside, on the rest of the journey to Bucaramanga, went somewhat un-noticed ,as the various body pains kept reminding me to keep my eyes on the road.

Arriving into Bucaramanga around 10.30pm and feeling sore in all sorts of places. I asked a taxi driver to escort me to the best hotel in the city. He brought me to the Dann Charlton, which had no rooms. They directed me to another good place which welcomed me with open arms, but told the dog to f**k off. However, they called another hotel, La Triada Hotel. They allowed me and the dog stay in the only room they had left, which was the Presidential Suite. The dog and myself enjoyed the huge whirlpool bath on the third level of our " room ". After dining on room service, and consuming all the beer in the mini bar, we retired for the night. The dog particulary enjoyed the 800 thread count sheets, in his own king size bed.

The bell captain brought me to down to the underground garage in the morning. On hearing I was going to Venezuela he said " fuck". Then he kept repeating it. He had very little English. He just kept saying "fuck". Then he mentioned a lot of "fucky". I did'nt know what to make of him. Here he is, working in a fancy hotel and cursing like a drunken sailor, to a guest, who has spent the night in their Presidential Suite, no less.

It was pissing rain. As you get higher in elevation you cross the highest point in Colombia. It gets very cold. The scenery is spectacular. At least the bits I can see, because of the fog. Pissing rain, freezing cold and endless fog. I now realise what the bell captain was trying to say. It was foggy, not fucky. The rain, fog, freezing cold, and the pains in my right wrist, arms, legs and back, made for an unforgettable trip.

The rain stopped six hours later, as I arrived in Cucuta. Here it is hot and dry. It seems to help the pain a bit. The folks in DIAN give me the exit stamp for the bike, after they come out of their office to check it. " It's a lovely bike", the nice DIAN guy says. Then he asks me, if the little pool of oil underneath the bike, is of any signifigance. F**k Cisneros I thought. Next time I'll bypass that damn place.

A very nice guy offers to escort me to the Honda dealer. They direct me to another place. The guy escorts me there also. After one hour, they come to the conclusion that there is a leak in the suspension and I would need to take it to some other repair shop. So, my guy, Herbert, who has stayed with me to make sure I'm ok, escorts me off again. Colombians really are the most decent of people.

The repair people can work on the bike manana. Yes, tomorrow is a word you learn very quickly in Colombia. So , Herbert brings me off to a decent hotel. Once again, I'm very welcome, but the dog is told to f**k off. After several more attempts, Herbert gets me a really nice hotel. He leaves, refusing to take a dime for all his trouble, and the 4 hours he spent escorting me all over Cucuta.

So, here I sit, in a hotel room, looking out the window at nearby Venezuela. The pains are beginning to subside, and the dog managed to get laid, thanks to a little Scotish Terrier in room 109. The bike should be ready in a few hours and if I manage not to fall off again, I should make it to Merida by 10pm. We'll see.

By RAAAY on Apr 26, 2008, 10:26 in Friendly Talkzone.

RAAAY says on Apr 26, 2008, 10:30:

I'm not one for chasing skirt, despite previous jokes to the contrary, but one can't help but notice, the most stunning looking girls all over the place, here in Cucuta.

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

gringoloid says on Apr 26, 2008, 10:59:

Raay, how do you find time for all this travelling when you own a business?

We also need some pictures.

RUV says on Apr 26, 2008, 11:08:

Ray,

Have any pictures? Nice post.

Waterdawg says on Apr 26, 2008, 11:14:

Kick ass Post Ray .. My body is just to old and beat up after a life time in the Military to ride a bike more than an hour .. lol

Medellin Traveler says on Apr 26, 2008, 11:40:

RAAAY......... put the beer down and pick up a camera!

Sounds like you're having a great time.

Hope all is well.

Medellin Es Una Chimba! - www.medellintraveler.com

jorgegdiaz says on Apr 26, 2008, 12:10:

Thursday was rainning cats and dogs in Bucaramanga. I had to take cabs and buses instead of driving.

You are making a hell of a drive !!!!

Going to Merida in Venezuela, or go to Maracaibo, and go back to Med through Cartagena?

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

Portena says on Apr 26, 2008, 12:13:

I thought you were hanging around Medellin looking at churches and museums.

Glad you were able to get up and get back on your motorcycle after the RR track incident! Ouch!

I feel better! I can smile at it now, I feel better. Ohhhh, better! Gnarls Barkley

robi666 says on Apr 26, 2008, 12:32:

I'd love to see Merida.
Take care.

"I am a citizen of the most beautiful nation on earth. A nation whose laws are harsh yet simple, a nation that never cheats, which is immense and without borders, where life is lived in the present."

webmanco says on Apr 26, 2008, 12:32:

Nice report Raaay, it is clear you do the talk and do the walk. I am glad you are a survivor of two of the greatest fears in Colombia, traveling by road and in a motorcicle not to mention with a pretty "parrillera"

I heard many colombians travel to Punto Fijo in Venezuela, it seems things are cheap there.

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

RAAAY says on Apr 26, 2008, 14:00:

This is Hernando, and his team of highly trained Honda Goldwing mechanics. It's almost 4pm and they have just gotten finished. Hernando has to rush home, as it is the 3rd Saturday of the month, he tells me he always has a shower at the same time every month.

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Merida, in Venezuela will have to wait until tomorrow. It started pissing rain just as they finished the bike. Anyway, another day here will give time to let the various pains go away, and allow the right wrist to heal a little.

The mini bar has been re-stocked and my dog is off humping the Scotish Terrier in room 109 again. Some girl at the front door of the hotel beckoned at me with the words " fucky fucky ".
I don't see any fog, so I don't know what she's talking about.

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

robi666 says on Apr 26, 2008, 14:06:

LOL... why any picture that you post has to look like a Photoshop fake? Look at the first one...

RAAAY says on Apr 26, 2008, 14:15:

Are you trying to wind up M.T. again...?

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

pedro says on Apr 26, 2008, 14:34:

I guess "Fuck" is the theme word for your stay in Cucuta. Check out that yellow number plate at the top of photo #2. :o)

¡save pow wow!

RAAAY says on Apr 26, 2008, 16:56:

Just got back from the local shopping mall. Incredable big place, that is nicer and more modern looking, than even the fancier malls in Medellin.I needed to get more clothes, as this little jaunt, seems like it is going to take longer than planned. When I get this gear on later, I'm going to look like someone heading off to the Woodstock festival. My new Cordoroy trousers and pink shirt, are going to make a big hit, in the finer Cucuta clubs.

Cucuta is an interesting town. I can't understand why Robi and Morphus, and all the other sex tourists have not discovered it. Warm, cheap, and full of very attractive girls. Much noiser streets, than anywhere else I have been in Colombia. A lot of honking cars, each of which have very loud, blaring music. You would think you were in the Dominican Republic, or somewhere like it. All the cars have Venezuelan tags. They are allowed to import them here, but need a permit from DIAN to leave the department of Santander.

There are no cracks in Cucuta

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But, there is everything else.

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Even the local Hare Krishnas.......

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

RAAAY says on Apr 26, 2008, 16:59:

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The local shoe shine........taking the road mud off my boots......the boots are almost as long as his arms.

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But he's keeping a close eye on me.

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Now, a quick shower, and off to the disco...........

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

robi666 says on Apr 26, 2008, 17:08:

We have an idea... if you like that so much, why don't you move there?

eywed says on Apr 26, 2008, 17:10:

That dudes giving you the stink eye RAAAY. I was Just thinking , Does the number of beers you have along your trip Equal the number of times you hurt your bike? Hurt yourself but careful with the bike and your dog.

Ay Hombe!!!!!

robi666 says on Apr 26, 2008, 17:11:

eywed, the f*ing dog is not an easy target... we try in Medellin on the 33, but he has nine lives like cats...

RAAAY says on Apr 26, 2008, 17:12:

robi666 says on Saturday April 26th, 2008 17:08:

" We have an idea... if you like that so much, why don't you move there? "

Naw........there's no Eye Talians here.............I 'd have nobodys food to spit into, when they go to the bathroom.

.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

eywed says on Apr 26, 2008, 17:46:

RAAAY more Photos

Ay Hombe!!!!!

Chriscan says on Apr 26, 2008, 17:54:

voyer - nice work

************* WARNING ************* my words often come from my ass

Catfish35 says on Apr 27, 2008, 10:10:

Hell, I thought he was helping out at my Ice Cream Shop!
Nice Post Raaay, have a great time !!!

"I refuse to have a battle of intelligence with an unarmed person, therefore I will just speak as the simpleton you have come to love"

miamimike says on Apr 27, 2008, 12:04:

RAAAY--- That Goldwing's Oilpan doesn't have much clearence for Colombia's poor roads, out of curiousity, what made you select a Wing for Colombia? Why Not something like BMW GS? With the BMW, there's many good aftermarket Steel or Aluminum Oil Pan Protectors on the market for a Bike like this. And these suckers have some serious ground clearance.

BMW 1150 GS: http://arch.smugmug.com/gallery/810#P-1-9

Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." GW Bush

robi666 says on Apr 27, 2008, 14:48:

Ray, did you get to Merida?

Medellin Traveler says on Apr 27, 2008, 15:17:

por favor mas foticos, raaay con tres a's

Medellin Es Una Chimba! - www.medellintraveler.com

RAAAY says on Apr 27, 2008, 15:24:

Nope...........still in Cucuta.........I'm going to get a permit for the bike from the Venezuelan folks, so that I can stay there and travel in Venezuela for a bit. They don't open at the week-ends. I'll go in the morning. It would'nt be nessairy if I just wanted to go for one night and stay near the border before coming back to Colombia. But, I'm hoping there are no Italians in Venezuela, so maybe I'll just stay there.

.But, back to Cucuta. I've just gotten back from another mall. The most noticable thing is the number of overweight men. Yes, I spent the last hour looking at men in Cucuta. It's mind blowing how many of them are fat. It would remind you of a trip to Disneyland in the US. I reckoned that the number of fat men here is around 8 out of 10. Quite extraordinary.

Perhaps it has something to do with income levels here. It's not just a generalized statement. I actually sat down and watched the number of fat men. The percentage is definately even higher than in the States.

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

Medellin Traveler says on Apr 27, 2008, 15:28:

Where you looking in the mirror again? :O)

Medellin Es Una Chimba! - www.medellintraveler.com

Catfish35 says on Apr 27, 2008, 16:02:

It is truly strange Raaaay and I...I like to sit outside of the Wal-Marts here in the states and count Gluteus Maximus Elephantitis also....Hmmm Raaaay may be on to something big here...Very Fat men surrounded by very beautiful women...Could this be where heaven is located?

"I refuse to have a battle of intelligence with an unarmed person, therefore I will just speak as the simpleton you have come to love"

Catfish35 says on Apr 27, 2008, 16:04:

Raaaay, on a serious side? Whats the military climate look like there or close by..Do you notice anything like more of a presence on VZ side or vice versa or anything at all even?? Just curious!

"I refuse to have a battle of intelligence with an unarmed person, therefore I will just speak as the simpleton you have come to love"

robi666 says on Apr 27, 2008, 16:14:

Military climate? :)

RAAAY says on Apr 27, 2008, 17:30:

Catfish..........no need for military here in Cucuta. It must be the safest place in Colombia. The women are beautifull, and they all want to do is meet nice Americans. I would suggest to all those who come to Colombia for this purpose, that they stay away from Medellin. Go to Cucuta. Here you will be a real rock star. They won't even notice your big fat American belly. They appreciate you for your mind, not your dollar. Medellin is useless for seeking women, forget about it...........come to Cucuta.

.

.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

webmanco says on Apr 27, 2008, 17:39:

You might need to think twice before staying in Cucuta, not long ago a foreigner went back to his country with a broken heart, he even posted a few pictures here. He got the wake up call.

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

Catfish35 says on Apr 27, 2008, 20:57:

Cool...may take take that up on you Raaay tanks! be safe!

Si, ROB, just wanted to see what if anything at all may be the buzz around the border with VZ concerning any Military activity on either side, ya know like more on one side than the other or just plain nothing at all. Just curious...butt sounds like I may like a stay there a bit!

"I refuse to have a battle of intelligence with an unarmed person, therefore I will just speak as the simpleton you have come to love"

adrimm says on Apr 27, 2008, 21:14:

If Cucuta were indeed the safest part of Colombia, then all those nice girls wouldn't be nearly as interested in foreigners as they appear to be. Cucuta (and increasingly the outskirts of Bucaramanga) is one of the regions that has been hard-hit by lots of displazadors.. and in Cucuta there is the double economic whammy of the changes in the Venezuelan economy. Watch yourself leaving the ATMs.

Aide from that sound like you had a good ride, the scenery through the high parts is stunning.. right before you get the first toll on the plateaus it reminds me of the stony cool hills in Ireland or something

webmanco says on Apr 27, 2008, 21:20:

It was one interesting thread, carita de angel anyone?

http://poorbuthappy.com/colombia/post/my-first-colombian-experience-in...

But, I'm going to start making some assumptions here.... Which means I might actually end up making an ass out of myself ..........Thu 04 17, 2008 11:34 am

RAAAY says on May 11, 2008, 17:56:

Time to finish my story about this little trip. Today is a good day to do it, what with having a ferocious hangover..................

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After the dog has a little refreshment, we head off in the direction of Venezuela. It's not easy to see where Venezuela starts and Colombia stops, there is so much traffic. I discover that I have already left Colombia, without getting stamped out, so I have to go back to the DAS building. You actually have to tell the DAS guy weather you are arriving or departing. The same line handles both. There is no security, checking bags, none of that.

Every vehicle seems to be just waved on. At this point I have my first encounter with Venezuelan police. He is leaning against a pillar, on his cell phone. I'm beside him, waiting for him to acknowledge me. Eventually he is ready and I ask him where do I go to get my passport stamped in. He gruffly waves me off in the direction of this little booth.

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San Antonio is a dirty, smelly town. I wandered around a bit. The dog did'nt like the place either. He decided that nobody would even notice another bit of shit on the pavement. I thought it a good idea not to bother scooping it up.

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It takes a couple of hours to get the bike permit and insurance. After getting it all sorted out, I just want to get out of this friggin town. Trying to get directions out is a joke. Every policeman I asked were rude and obnoxious. One told me to take the Colombian flag off the bike. I said no. He was a pissed at this. He told me again. I said NO again. Now, he is lost for words and just rambles on, so I just pulled off, my Colombian and Irish flags fluttering gently in the breeze.. F*** him.

You can't get gas in San Antonio if you have Colombian plates on your vehicle and there are huge lines at the few gas stations. After cutting in front of a long line, I get all gassed up, less than $1 to fill up. The same fill up costs about $30 in Colombia. I take off the Colombian flag. It is apparent that I will have problems getting gas, if they think you are Colombian.

The road eventually brings some decent scenery. But, everytime I stop, you notice garbage strewn about.

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Around 9pm I come to the town of Barinas. I spot a nice looking hotel and check in for the night. After pulling down the sheets I notice that the bed comes equipped with a collection of bugs.

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Hotel Espor........the next morning............never again.

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A little up the road, you get a sense of how much of Venezuela's oil revenues is spent on housing.

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Between Barinas and Merida there is some really nice scenery. The mountain road is good, but like everywhere else here, there are very few road signs to warn of sharp curves. The countryside would remind you of rural Austria or Switzerland. There are some lovely small hotels, all with seperate cabins. It appears they get quite a bit of tourism from hill walkers and cyclists.

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On arrival in Merida the first thing that hits you is the amount of traffic. It is brutal. Hot and too much traffic. This bike is big and very noticable. Venezuelans totally ignore you. They will look and turn away quickly. Everyone, everywhere. They turn away. Colombians are a friggin torture. Passing people on the road, they whistle, yelp, stare at this big friggin bike. Road workers signal their friends when they see you coming. People in cars take photos. It is never ending in Colombia. Venezuelans just ignore you.

Except for the kids in Merida.
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After checking e-mail in one of those internet cafes, I discover that DIAN will be closed on Thursday for the holiday. I'm unsure if they will remain closed until Tuesday as Monday is a holiday. So, only time for a sandwich in Merida and a little spin around the town before heading back.

Around 6pm I come on a roadblock entering some little town. These people had put huge pieces of wood blocking the road and set it alight. Nobody could get passed, people seemed a little frightened and began turning around. I noticed some of these thugs looking at the bike. My thought was, they might consider it a good addition to their fire. I managed to beat a hasty exit down a side street and eventually ended up around the barricade.

This picture was taken while it was still light, but not enough for a good shot.

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The ride to San Cristobol took until around 11pm. There was some sort of power outage, so all the little towns were in total darkness. You can't see the speed bumps on entry into every town, so you need to be really carefull. I did'nt realise until I got back, that Venezuela is considered dangerous to be on the roads alone and at night.
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First Gringo he has laid eyes on.
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I discover that San Cristobal has a very nice 5 star hotel. Of we go, no more of that other shite with bugs. They relucantly accept the dog, who was more than happy to get into good sheets again. At $220 US per night, we relaxed in the hot tub and devoured the room service fare.

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More traffic in the morning. San Cristobol to San Antonio seemed to be one big traffic jam. I could'nt get gas as the lines were just too long. There were a few nice things to see on the way.

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The traffic in San Antonio was terrible. It was also hot and clammy. The poor dog was not impressed. I got the passport stamped out and asked the nice Venezuelan lady to give me a little water, from the cooler beside her. She shrugged and said no. Between the heat and the traffic and this bitch, I was not in the humour for another obnoxious Venezuelan. I gave her a verbal lambasting that included the word F*** about ten times. I enquired of her, if she was aware that Chavez is a faggot. I also politely told her, that I would say a wee prayer that she be struck by a bolt of lightning.

The nicest thing for me was to see the back of Venezuela and the welcome to Colombia sign.

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Back in Cucuta and stamped in by the friendly and efficent DAS officer. " Welcome to Colombia " he said, with a warm smile. I stopped by some police officers to ask directions to the DIAN office. They smiled, patted the dog, gave me directions and wished me a nice trip. Thank God to be back in Colombia. DIAN was closed for lunch, but the security guys went inside to get some water for the dog. The poor wee F**ker was roasting, so I poured some water over him. Not impressed.

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I put my Florida plate back on and the DIAN guy took about 15 minutes to check the bike and give me a new permit. I wandered around Cucuta and found some gas. I ask a guy for directions to the same hotel I had stayed in before. He, of course, insists on escorting me to the hotel. Back to the shopping mall, more new clothes, but not until after finding a nice bird to make a sandwich out of.

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The ride to Bucramanga was much nicer this time. No rain and the pains from the spill in Cisneros were beginning to wear off.

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This was a funeral prosession. There was about 100 vehicles of all sorts.

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I stumbled onto a nasty Colombian Biker gang. On the road between Cucuta and Bucaramanga. They were stopped at the little village which represents the highest point in Colombia.........

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They surrounded the bike.......It's a good thing my vicious guard dog kept them off...

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They forced me to follow them to Bucaramanga............Once there, they decided to try and poisin me. They forced me to drink some sort of Local Colombian liquid. All in all.....a truly nasty bunch...........I'm lucky to have escaped.

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Bucaramanga to Medellin..........nice day......nice ride......nice people........they're Colombian after all..............

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

mranderson says on May 11, 2008, 18:48:

Awsome pictures and nice trip.

Papi de Alejo says on May 11, 2008, 18:56:

Great photos Raaay. I see there's a whole lot of Colombia that I have yet to see.

PdA

jorgegdiaz says on May 12, 2008, 06:23:

Nice trip !!.
I not surprised by your impression of Venezuelan police.

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.

slguy says on May 12, 2008, 06:28:

raaay, i can't remember a thread i enjoyed readiing more. great job!

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

RAAAY says on May 12, 2008, 11:00:

....One more pic..........I spent some quality time with one of these sheep.......

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

jonas says on May 12, 2008, 11:45:

Was that shoeshine guy in Cucuta Eye Talian?

What I have, I do not want to lose, but Where I am I do not want to stay, but those I love, I do not want to leave, but those I know I no longer want to see, but Where I die, I do not want to go;I want to stay where I have never been

RAAAY says on May 12, 2008, 19:58:

I think so Jonas..........he looks so like other Eye Talians that I know.......

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.........Its useless to argue with ignorance