The real scoop on Colombia. .

IMorcombe says on Jan 6, 2006, 05:59:

I am impressed! Did anyonedeclare January 6th sarcasm day?

Maria Ines

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cali373 says on Jan 6, 2006, 06:16:

OUCH!

Smile if you are a thinker!

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elmodefoque says on Jan 6, 2006, 06:45:

I’ve decided that for the year 2006, I will no longer continue to fabricate any more stories that are untruth and falsehood about my country. I’ve now realize that people around the glove seeking info about Colombia sometimes end up on this site.
I just want to clarify one thing that I made up and has brought much embarrassment and pain to all costeños.
I have NEVER screwed a burra and know of NO ONE ever doing such a disgusting act in the northern Colombian coast.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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haji says on Jan 6, 2006, 07:33:

OH MY That sounds like a wonderfull dream,but it is certainly not Colombia
However,Thank you so much for making me laugh so hard I really needed that.

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toneloc24 says on Jan 6, 2006, 07:52:

WOW!!! Wonder if the more enlightened of our posters will try to chime on this one and spread some more "truths" about Colombia that the world doesn't know.

Esp. since this entirely depicts their version of how the true Colombia should be represented around the world.

Maybe this will even bring ColX out the woodworks. LOL!!!

Elmo, one of these days, your Colombian folks on PBH are gonna rip you a new one and declare you persona non grata...again. No worries. If Dave Chapelle has another racial draft, you'll be our #1 draft pick. You can roll with us anytime, just no burras.

"PBH is dead!!!!"

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tomtom33 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Jan 6, 2006, 08:23:

elmodefoque says on Jan 6, 2006, 08:31:

costeños screwing burras is all a myth started by a cachaco back in 1902.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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Colombiche says on Jan 6, 2006, 08:32:

Toneloc This is clearly another exaggeration, the other extreme. Elmo is being sarcastic.

I don't think any reasonable Colombian would seriously really depict Colombia this way either.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Colombiche says on Jan 6, 2006, 08:58:

yeah Morphus, you are right.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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toneloc24 says on Jan 6, 2006, 09:21:

Yeah Morphus But what if another Colombian talks about Colombia? It's not just foreigners.

This site seems to be wanting to lean to a "shiny happy people", "everything's rosy" version, which would be a great disservice to ALL.

Colombiche - Of course, Elmo's exaggerations are making fun of some people on here. It's apparently the view that some people on this site want the world to believe. This time, as opposed to attacking him, why not debate him with insight? He does, at the least, drop insight within his ramblings. Whether you agree with him or not, you gotta give him that much.

"PBH is dead!!!!"

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Albatross says on Jan 6, 2006, 09:31:

That brought tears to my eyes Elmo, I didn't realize how much the REAL Colombia is like the REAL America.

Thank You

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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Colombiche says on Jan 6, 2006, 09:42:

Toneloc "This time, as opposed to attacking him, why not debate him with insight?"

I have never attacked Elmo.

Anyways, even if I wrote that not all Colombianas are gold diggers, that we are not bait for foreigners, would anybody believe me? No. What would be the point in writing it?

I do have a question though. Elmo jokingly says that in Colombia "natives and blacks live in the best neighborhoods are the most educated and control the politician and economic wealth of our nation". Can anybody please name a country where this actually is the case? Please give me the name of a country where natives and black have political power and live in the best neighborhoods. If anybody gives me the name of such a country, I will paypal you $10,000.00 (US not CAD).

Miguel says on Jan 6, 2006, 09:58:

The Nation of.. H A R L E M

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Wastelandlive says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:00:

I'll be eagerly awaiting my downpayment. Haiti.
Liberia.
Zimbabwe.

The list could be longer... but you've only offered a fixed reward, so why push it?

I don't carry a paypal account. But I'm not in a hurry; I'll take a banker's draft. PM me for my mailing address.

R-

Wasteland

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toneloc24 says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:03:

Colombiche You do have a tendency to go on attack. In this case, you have not...yet.

Only an idiot would believe that all Colombianas are gold-diggers. A complete loser. So why even fight that battle? Don't argue with fools.

I'll take your $10,000USD. Kenya and Nigeria are two. But the continent of Africa is loaded with these types of situations. Guess why?

By the way, why choose the easiest one of Elmo's exaggerations to make your point?

"PBH is dead!!!!"

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Colombiche says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:09:

... not getting across

Blacks and Natives. Read above. I said Blacks AND natives. Not blacks OR natives (different logical operators). A country where blacks, whites and natives co-exist and blacks and natives live in the best neighborhoods. Giving me the name of an African country like Zimbabwe with a black population of 98% doesn't make sense. In Zimbabwe whites make up less than 1% of the population. Here is the racial breakdown for Liberia:

indigenous African tribes 95% (including Kpelle, Bassa, Gio, Kru, Grebo, Mano, Krahn, Gola, Gbandi, Loma, Kissi, Vai, Bella, Mandingo, and Mende), Americo-Liberians 2.5% (descendants of former U.S. slaves), Congo People 2.5% (descendants of former Caribbean slaves)

Liberia doesn't even list whites as part of their population. I think you are going to have to keep waiting for the payment. If you have a country with a population that is all black, then logically, the best neighborhoods will be ihabited by blacks.

Tone -- When did I attack you? As a matter of fact, what personal attacks are you referring to?

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Crazy Eagle says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:14:

Colombiche has an out here.... She asked for "the name of a country where natives and blacks have political power and live in the best neighborhoods", so that would exclude countries where 99.9% of the population are natives and blacks, because in these countries there are not even nearly enough whites to run the shop. Giving places like Haiti as examples is kind of like pointing to some hell-hole reservation as a place where American Indians have political power and live in the best shacks.

"Caught between the twisted stars the plotted lines the faulty map that brought Colombus to New York." Lou Reed

"The natural rhythm of life is routine punctuated by orgy" Aldous Huxley

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rocinante says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:20:

)~ I just want to have a post in every locked or deleted thread.

I love sarcasm. Thanks Elmo.

To see the best neighborhoods/bars in MDE check out my images....

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Not that the US president actually runs the US." Feb 5, 2008

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Colombiche says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:24:

Toneloc You ask: "By the way, why choose the easiest one of Elmo's exaggerations to make your point?

Because there are many things he says that I actually agree with. Please refer to Qubo's thread about racism by a Colombian restaurant worker. I have always taken the stance that Colombia does need to get its act together in terms of how blacks and natives are treated.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Colombiche says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:30:

Haiti? You think there is no racism in Haiti?

Check this article on Haitixchange:

http://www.haitixchange.com/article_0023.asp

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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elmodefoque says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:35:

I guy to keep a close eye on A guy to keep a close eye on is this Indian dude from Bolivia, Morales. I wont be surprise if you see bolivian whites getting the hell outta there and moving to Argentina. I bet plenty of nice homes will be left behind and I might just take my Indians ass over there and take over one of these nice places, but first we gotta get Colombian broad down there to teach them native bolivianas how to dress sexy, cause that long dress and sandals is not gonna cut it for me, plus they also gotta shave them legs and let their hair out.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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Albatross says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:45:

Blancos, Mulattos y Negros When I was in the Dominican Republic last week, I had an interesting conversation about race.

The D.R. shares their island (Hispanola) with Haiti, which is the poorest country in the western hemisphere and of course Haitians are generally very dark. Apparently this fact makes the average Dominican even more sensitive about race than thay might be otherwise.

According to the people I was talking with, if a Dominican can possibly deny being any part Negro they will. Even if they have dark skin, as long as they do not have "negroid" features they will still consider themselves White and may be offended if you don't as well.

They do not even like the term "Mulatto", because it suggests a White/Black mix. I found this out when I told a girl that I generally prefer Mulattas to Blancas. I was actually very surprised that they had this much of a problem

I was wondering if things are this bad in Colombia.

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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poco says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:46:

Half Truths I have NEVER screwed a burra and know of NO ONE ever doing such a disgusting act in the northern Colombian coast.

At best,, coming from the burros mouth,, the statement MIGHT be half true.

While taking some photos of the gas connections in the kitchen I accidentally snapped the shutter. Not a total loss,, almost everyone in Colombia gets new clothes for Christmas and this girl was sporting her new jeans.

"When you men get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then, wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a pussy." Quote - General Tommy Franks

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Wastelandlive says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:50:

My my my... you are full of non-sequitirs Did I suggest that there was no racism in Haiti?

I simply point out that Haiti meets your challenge.

Which was this:

"Please give me the name of a country where natives and black have political power and live in the best neighborhoods. If anybody gives me the name of such a country, I will paypal you $10,000.00 (US not CAD)."

You didn't originally stipulate that the nation would ALSO have to have a "white" population large enough to control the political power, but not actually do so (that would be South Africa, for example).

So far as your rejection of African nations... well, that must have to do with some confusion as to the meaning of "native." The common useage of that term applies to the indigenous population that existed before the age of European colonialism (or Chinese colonialism in Asia).

So in Africa, blacks ARE natives.

I suppose that might not be the case in Haiti... where the native Carib Indians were long ago whiped out. Perhaps Haiti is a land to which none are native?

Strange notions. Don't worry Colombiche, I won't hold you to it.

Wasteland

Wasteland

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miamimike says on Jan 6, 2006, 10:50:

Happy to see Morales won Elmo.. Finally they have a native President representing his own people.Bet the tables are turned on how Bolivia sells its huge natural gas reserves. Should be interesting. I have a friend who has retired there and he loves it! Its really a understated country!

Avatar Legend: Bush "If any of you Reporters are wondering, it was a Size 10"

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Colombiche says on Jan 6, 2006, 11:27:

Wasteland Okay, blacks are natives in Africa. You can also say Swedes are natives of sweden....

So if you have an African country with a black/native population of nearly 100%, how can you use that as an example for racial harmony and equality (let's leave the disputes between different african tribes out of this for now). It's like me telling you than in Colombia, we have Colombians living in the best neigborhoods... hu?

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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platano says on Jan 6, 2006, 11:37:

Colombian indigenous and blacks live in the best neighborhoods This is true: Colombian indigenous and blacks live in the best neighborhoods. Whenever I was invited to the best neighborhoods, invariably, there, in whatever house I was visiting, I would find Colombian indigenous and blacks, sometimes two or three in the same house. Each usually had a small dingy room with a small single bed, often near the laundry or kitchen work area.

plátano

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elmodefoque says on Jan 6, 2006, 11:41:

jijijij platano, those are maids. great point!!!

I'll get there, when I get there!

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elmodefoque says on Jan 6, 2006, 11:42:

Mike, with Morales victory, the only remaining ultra right wing leader in South America will be Uribe and maybe some dude in Chile.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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Tinto (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Jan 6, 2006, 11:50:

The dude in Chile (the likely new president) is a socialist dudette ;-)

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poco says on Jan 6, 2006, 11:52:

Secret They are lucky to be working and have a roof over their head.

Last time I checked,, it took zero education to be a domestic and for every opening created by someone with sufficient wealth to acquire domestic help there would be dozens of hopefuls dreaming they might be lucky enough to have the job.

Things will be EXACTLY this way,,,, forever,,, or at least until some EDUCATED person develops a way to consume one dollars worth of rice and sell the waste product for MORE than one dollar.

"When you men get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then, wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a pussy." Quote - General Tommy Franks

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platano says on Jan 6, 2006, 11:55:

Elmo, Maids? Of course! That explains why they never really entered into the conversations, kept their heads down, and kept coming around bringing those jugo de lulos. Damn attractive maids... whether maids, CEO's or guerrilleras, Colombian women rock!

plátano

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Wastelandlive says on Jan 6, 2006, 12:33:

Actually Colombiche... The Swedes would consider their "natives" to be the Sami people of their arctic reaches.

Hey... it's not easy being a sabelotodo.

Wasteland

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crazi4cali says on Jan 6, 2006, 17:38:

Elmo, you missed something! Elmo, You forgot one very important "reality" about Colombia in your posting! You didn't mention the total exaggeration (and misunderstanding) about safety & kidnappings! EVERYONE knows how safe it is walking through "El Centro" with BLING-BLING around your neck and holding an expensive video camera & that the chances of getting kidnapped is next to slim to none!

Crazi

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Crazy4Cali says on Jan 6, 2006, 20:03:

Congratulations, Elmo! You seem to have settled in to your new job at the Colombian Chamber of Commerce quite comfortably.

I can't wait to read how the mosquitos don't bite the foreigners and how the taxi drivers won't add on the Gringo surcharge (though that's only happened to me twice...that I was aware of, anyway).

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Sam Salmon says on Jan 6, 2006, 21:13:

Elmo Strikes Again! Man with a sarcastic post like that I you should be nominated for 'Honourary Salmonhood'!

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!



' a la orden!'

' a la orden!'

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miamimike says on Jan 6, 2006, 21:37:

Elmo, Urribe will be by his lonesome if Michelle Bachelt A Socialist single mother will become Chile's first female president, it emerged today - as long as she can defeat a conservative multimillionaire businessman in a runoff election in January.
Michelle Bachelet took the lead in the first round of elections on Sunday, with 45.8% of the vote and 96% of the ballots counted. She faces Sebastián Piñera, who won 25.4% of the vote, on January 15.

Joaquín Lavín, in third place, admitted defeat on Sunday after winning 23.2%, saying he would now back Mr Piñara

"This is the time for unity," he said. "Between the two of us ... we had more votes than Bachelet, and we have a clear chance to win the presidency."
Ms Bachelet said she was disappointed not to have won outright, but pledged to campaign more effectively before the next round.

"Perhaps our message did not get through to voters," she said. "But that's a good reason for us to work harder so that in January we can win."

Ms Bachelet may pick up voters who backed the fourth-placed candidate, Tomás Hirsh. Mr Hirsh, who represents a coalition that includes the Communist party, received 5.1% of the votes.

Ms Bachelet was once imprisoned and tortured under General Pinochet's regime. She went on to serve as defence minister in the centre-left, pro-government coalition that has ruled Chile since the dictatorship ended in 1990.

If elected president, she says, she would extend the government's policies that have halved poverty in Chile and transformed its economy into the most stable in South America. She has also pledged to overhaul the country's private pension system.

Ms Bachelet is the daughter of an air force general who opposed the Pinochet coup and was jailed and tortured by his peers, dying in prison. Along with her mother, she herself was imprisoned and tortured before being allowed to go into exile first in Australia and then in East Germany.

Mr Piñera is reported to be the richest man in Chile, with $1bn (£567m) in assets. His companies include finance and banking firms, Chile's largest airline and a television channel. He has promised to put all his interests in a blind trust if he is elected president.

Avatar Legend: Bush "If any of you Reporters are wondering, it was a Size 10"

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