Something Needs to Dramatically Change on This Website

poco says on Sep 17, 2005, 12:09:

Calm Down That site has been around for a quite a while. It is not even a good source of bad ideas. Most of the posts are from the same "inbred" group who obtain their knowledge from the pig breeders starring in Deliverance

Colombian Chickens are crowing about the new President of the U.S. who will assure that From each according to their ability to each according to their need.

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CaryGrant says on Sep 17, 2005, 12:12:

Bx Got bitterness?

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calipro says on Sep 17, 2005, 12:12:

BxUnika, I think you have been duped... (This is something I've thought for quite a while but seeing that other "Colombia Forum" really was the catalyst for writing this post. I recognized a lot of people on that board as people who regularly post here through their names and/or writing styles. It seems a lot of you know you can't post the crap that you'd like to here, so you go over there to spew your garbage. You guys know who you are.)


I went over to the board in question and didn{t recognize anybody{s writing style when I compared it to their handles. If you ask me it is one or two guys talking to themselves using the handles from people on this board. It is obviously an attempt to discredit this board and the posters that post here.

If I{m not mistaken you are the only one that fell for it. By the way who do you think the guys are?

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Hunter says on Sep 17, 2005, 12:12:

BxUnika I have said several times before, that we need a seperate forum for relationships, dating, call it what you will, until that happens you will continue to see relationship threads on this forum and in threads that started off unrelated.

The moderators tried deleting before, but never got rid of them, never will in my opinium.

Hunter

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 12:24:

CaliPro Funny, because you seem to generate a lot of static on here as well. I can't recall a single post where you have seven said something of value. Of cusre you'd say that.

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calipro says on Sep 17, 2005, 12:33:

BxUnika What did I tell you about drinking and then writing on this board. hehehe!

Of couse I'd say what?

Are you accusing me of posting on the other board?

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pleasetranslate says on Sep 17, 2005, 13:00:

Amen BxUnica,

Amen, sister! Even the poor peasant girls of Colombia deserve better than some old, overweight, pathetic American man with "inadequacy" issues who can't score "uppity" American women.

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silviat says on Sep 17, 2005, 13:02:

That kind of posts used to make me angry as well, specially when they started talking bad about colombian women because of this or that reason... "colombian women are terrible because they want our money and our green card, and we are naive gringos/europeans that believe in them" Yeah right!

I used to get really angry and write angry msgs to the poster of such threads... but after a while I just got tired.

1. I have better things to do.
2. No matter how much I write and how many good or bad arguments I have I wont change the opinion of those persons.
3. And (whether I like it or not) there are some girls that put colombian women's image down when they sell theirselves because of dolars or green card.

I still think those guys who write things such as "all colombian women are this... the big majority of colombian women do this" are very stupid, but I try to dont worry about it anymore... and just feel glad my husband isnt one of those, my friends either...

Now, I wouldnt expect much of a conversation with a person that has that idea of a whole female population because of the 3, 4 or 50 stories he heard (of personally knew about) about colombian ladies, so if a girl chose to marry a guy like that even though his way to think... I am sorry for that lady... and for the guy.

My point related to your thread is... this is a free forum and if people wants to talk about their relationship with a person 20 years younger, their fiance who asks them for 1000 usd a month, etc etc, they are free to do so... If you dont like those threads dont read them... Do something else, read the news, go to a mall, walk, sleep... Is not that someone force you to read them... skip them and be happy.

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caslug says on Sep 17, 2005, 13:11:

BX..if you have ever visit COL as a single person.. Male OR female, you'll realize that meeting locals for dating is constantly going on. EVEN when it is NOT the primary reason for visit. You simply cannot avoid meeting locals.

"A person who truly wants to learn about Colombia shouldn't have scavenge through 50 bobadas to find a post that actually DOES have something to do with travel or living or culture in Colombia."

Social interacting(friendship/dating) with locals is ONE of the BEST ways to learn about COL culture and lifestyle. I agree that it gets boring and REPETIVE with the SAME questions being asked(usually by new male posters). I think they should search the forum before they post their questions. When I posted my observation from my trip to COL recently, i stated any questions should be PM to me so not to bore the board with "how/where to meet girls". So I got and replied to tons of male posters asking those questions.

BTW, local COLs are MORE than happy to tell you where to meet women/men and what places(clubs) to checkout. So if the locals are happy to help, why should this board get upset with the same questions.

PS. MOST travellers/foreigners i've meet in COl ARE single male travellers of ALL age range.

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calipro says on Sep 17, 2005, 13:28:

silviat (That kind of posts used to make me angry as well, specially when they started talking bad about colombian women because of this or that reason... "colombian women are terrible because they want our money and our green card, and we are naive gringos/europeans that believe in them" Yeah right!)

silviat

You hit the nail on the head.

The fact of the matter is that some relationships are just not going to work out. The sad truth of the matter is that a lot of guys that meet their wivies in South American will call her a green card shark (whore) if the relationship doesn{t workout rather than admitt any fault for the failed relationship. It{s sad but true.

But I don{t believe that there are many colombianas willing to sell themselves for a green card. Most of the women go into these relationships with the best of intentions and if the relationship fails they are rewarded by being accused of being a green card shark whore.

At least half of relationships that end are the men{s fault and just because a latina ends a relationship does not mean that she is necessarily insincere.

Green card shark (whores)are few and far between and I don{t think we are doing justice to the women involved by perpetuating the myth.

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Hunter says on Sep 17, 2005, 14:05:

silviat It would be nice to skip them, but because you are not supposed to talk about dating etc., many threads end up talking about them, even though they were not the topic of the original thread.

Where as if there was a seperate forum, you can then ignore it, unless you wish to partcipate, if somebody wished to then start taking about relationships in a unrelated thread on the general forum, somebody could direct to the other forum.

Hunter

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silviat says on Sep 17, 2005, 14:14:

I dont really know how many girls really go for a green card... I know there are some but I agree with you... I think most of those relationships are autentic (I may be wrong but I really believe so).

Why did they decide for the gringo? For the same reason the gringo decided for the colombiana.

In some cases that reason is love, atraction (e.g. many girls really like the pale skin, blond hair and blue eyes american guys... as many guys really like the brunette, black eyes and darker skin colombiana), etc ... in other cases is just money/visa vs desire of a younger/cuter body.

Why the relationships end? I bet in some cases the latin person leaves because she just wanted to be in the country... And I also bet that is gotta be hurtful.

But in the most of the cases there can be a huge amount of reasons. Are we forgetting that couples from the same culture and country have to face a thousand challenges & difficulties when they start a life together? Well I think to those usual challenges you have to add a ton more to intercultural couples.

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BAQ says on Sep 17, 2005, 14:31:

Am re-posting what I wrote Because it pertains to this conversation, I am going to re-post what i just finished writing on another thread. The topic was the 50 yr old man and 18 yr old girlfriend thing.

Calipro wrote in response to something I said: "Guys that jump to this conclusion are ones that have had absolutely no luck with younger women an thus are forced into believing that the other guy must be paying for it left and right"

MY response: This just not true.

There is no way you can sit there with a strait face and deny that the ONLY thing an 18yr old girl and a 50 yr old man have in common is Sex and money, or she is looking for a "Daddy"

Don;t get me wrong, if a 50 yr old guy wants to bang his 18 yr old novia 20 times a day, thats great, but he should be man enough to accept it for WHAT IT IS, being: I have the cash, you have the young body so it;s a great arrangement. Just be realistic and call a spade a spade.

If you think I am incorrect, then please explain WHY these same 50 year old men don;t have 18yr old novia's in American, Canada, England ect.

The answer is simple, 95% of the girls in America, Canada, England ect are much better off financially and don;t need a 50 year old guy and his money. Where in Colombia, due to economics, these 18 yr olds get a much better life financially with an older, financially secure gringo. Again, if I am wrong, please explain why you don;t see these same Colombian girls at the mall with 50 year old Colombian men of little means. These are relationships driven by money, which is FINE, but again, call it what it is, "A financial arrangement".

Semper Fidelis !

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calipro says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:02:

BAQ (If you think I am incorrect, then please explain WHY these same 50 year old men don;t have 18yr old novia's in American, Canada, England ect.)

Asking me to explain that would be like me trying to tell you why colombianas eat arepa in the morning while americanas eat toast. It is obviously a cultural thing and I'm not a social anthropologist.

I{m not fat, bald or over weight. In fact I{m in excellent physical shape but I{m 43 years old and my colombian girl friend is 18. I pay her nothing and although we have talked about marriage I have promised her nothing.

When I{m in town she lives with me 24 hours a day. She comes from an upper middle class family. Both of her parents live in Spain. She has lived in Spain but prefers to live and work in Colombia. Of course this is my own anecdotal experiance but I've had a lot of them over my ten years of traveling to Colombia.

Don{t ask me why colombianas don{t seem to have much of hang up on age as americanas. But if you don{t believe me, I'll show you. I'll be in Cali Nov. Jan and March. I'll introduce you to my girlfriend and alot of her friends that say they would like to find a guy like me. Who knows BAQ you might hit it off with one of them.

(These are relationships driven by money, which is FINE, but again, call it what it is, "A financial arrangement".)

BAQ, It isn{t right to imply that women are whores just because they are going out with an older guy. Trust me. This is rarely the case. I'll prove it to you if you give me the chance.

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silviat says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:18:

In some cases may be true specially with that significant age gap...

But there are also couples with big age gaps (20 years or so) that arent together either because of the sex or the money... there are not very common but they do exist (I know at least 2 couples like that thought in their cases they are both from the same country and none of them is really rich, they are just very intelectual and thats their common ground).

Oh and you see that in America, 20 something years old hot girl with 60 something years old v.rich man!

By the way and I just remember this funny thing. I have an aunt who is really hard with people and specially with her children, and she has a daughter who is always been a rebel so they always have had tons of problems. Well the other day my mother called me to tell me some gossips she receive from other aunt about them, and in between other gossips she told me my cousin who is 22 (and they are very wealthy family) has an american boyfriend who is 60 something or 50 something... I dont know if they have meet phisically or not... And I seriously doubt is about the money (probably more about making her mother go crazy) but due to the subject I thought it was funny to share it... my husbands reaction was... jesus, tu familia es loca!

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:21:

Correcto!! "It would be nice to skip them, but because you are not supposed to talk about dating etc., many threads end up talking about them, even though they were not the topic of the original thread."

Yes. Peter and the moderators had a ban on dating/sex posts a while ago and it took all of five minutes for all that to go out the windows.

"Where as if there was a seperate forum, you can then ignore it, unless you wish to partcipate, if somebody wished to then start taking about relationships in a unrelated thread on the general forum, somebody could direct to the other forum."

Precisely. Nowhere else can you go from a thread about Reggaeton, the climate in Girodot, bandeja paisa, and guanabana con leche to how Colombian women are in bed, getting marrying to one, and brothels to have sex with one. There is something fundamentally wrong with that. If these other people who are insulting me so much can't see that, maybe they are the ones with the issue.

The fact is, that if a random person searches out info on Colombia, finds a link to PBH, and sees nothing but this crap, it not only reflects badly on the gringos themselves, but also on Colombia and Colombians. With a country that has such a bad reputation and image in the media, do we REALLY need strangers who are curious about Colombia being fed this image that Colombian men are machista pigs, Colombian women are sexy, uneducated whores, Colombia is all about drugs, prostitution, and all things illegal, and that these are the only reasons to visit?

For those of you (hmmm, funny, it's only men) who think I'm crazy or enraged over this, do some homework for me. Go to the "Friendly Forums" and count all the threads that do NO deal with these topics I've mentioned and DON'T turn into a talk about drugs/sex/hookers/green cards/stereotypes. Then you might understand my point.

As for ignoring them? Well, it's hard to miss all these useless posts when a person means well and starts a post about a legitimate topic only to have it buried with stupid comments and the subject changed to the former.

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silviat says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:22:

ok I gotta go and have a life. Enough poor but happy for today... I am going to work on my wedding program and wedding things (cards) so people knows where to sit.

Besos

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:31:

Re: Silviat "I dont really know how many girls really go for a green card... I know there are some but I agree with you... I think most of those relationships are autentic (I may be wrong but I really believe so)."

Wel, maybe you don't know too many of thse girls because it's the gringos who are always doing the spouse-scouting and the complaining after they get played. Notice that unlike the gringos who at least once a day start a post about trying to find his "media naranja" in Colombia, there are no or next to no posts written by COLOMBIANAS who are on here in search or gringos or scheduling trips to the Us and Europe to find a gringo husband. Doesn't that speak volumes? That about says it all right there.

"Are we forgetting that couples from the same culture and country have to face a thousand challenges & difficulties when they start a life together?"

Sure. I have read many legitimate stories about husbands and wives who met by chance (not through an agency or because the 55 year old gringo was leering at she and her friends outside of her junior high school in Medellin). You have those and I see nothing wrong with that. But then again, you can feel the sincerity or the poster and little details will help you come to the conclusion that they are in a real relationship and they just happened to be of different nationalities.

"Well I think to those usual challenges you have to add a ton more to intercultural couples."

I completely agree. But I'm sure YOU would agree that these couples usually didn't meet through a marriage broker or on a Gringo Busca Colombiana gameshow or in a brothel in la Zona Roja.

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BAQ says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:38:

NEVER said they were whores Calipro, I NEVER said or implied they were whores. I was only pointing out the reason these 18 yr olds are attaching themselves to much older men.

As far as a cultural thing, I don;t see how that can be true when you use the 18-50 model. If that were the case, you would be seeing 18 yr old colombian women with 50 year old COLOMBIAN men and I have never seen that here (and I live here). Now if you want to talk about 30 yr old women and 50 year old men, yes, that is more cultural, but not 18 yr olds.

I am not being judgemental, if any man, regardless of age, wants an 18 yr old novia that is fine, I have no problem with it. What I DO think is rediculous is that same man thinking be is the cats meow and living under a dilusion that "She loves me for me".

If anyone wants to prove my theory wrong, move down here, get a small apartment in an estrada 2 or 3, budget your living expenses at 500.000 pesos per month and see how many of these SAME GIRLS will still give you the time of day.

Calipro, you are also NOT 50. I am 48 and my Colombian wife is 18 yrs my junior and we are very happily married. Honestly, I could have found an 18-25 yr old if I had looked, but in my mind there is just TO BIG A DIFFERENCE in ages for me and an 18 yr old to have anything in common. I have already LIVED my teens and early 20's, so the things a young girl wants to do don;t interest me (other than the sex) and if you are basing a relationship on sex, you are doomed from day one.

Hope that explains a bit better.

Semper Fidelis !

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:39:

Re: CaliPro "But I don{t believe that there are many colombianas willing to sell themselves for a green card. Most of the women go into these relationships with the best of intentions and if the relationship fails they are rewarded by being accused of being a green card shark whore"

"At least half of relationships that end are the men{s fault and just because a latina ends a relationship does not mean that she is necessarily insincere."

"Green card shark (whores)are few and far between and I don{t think we are doing justice to the women involved by perpetuating the myth."

Ok, so we fundamentally agree. Then why is this forum loaded with "I married her in Barranquilla after two months, let her in on my savings account, and now she is sleeping with a barranquillero her own age" stories? Why do we read sob stories and "How can I get a divorce?" stories every other day?

Again, I don't blame the women, I blame the men. For many men on her a colombiana is either a naive, Third World, sexy, spicy, exotic mestiza/mulata primative that he can control until things go wrong. When things turn out bad, she is a suddenly a conniving whore gold digger who will suck a golfball through a garden hose for a green card. Well, maybe if these men weren't so self-centered and had developed some self-esteem and social skills they wouldn't need to travel across the world for a girlfriend. They set themselves up for this. People warn them, they do what they want, they pay the price, and then we have to listen to them cry a river about how they got played.

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:39:

Re: CaliPro "But I don{t believe that there are many colombianas willing to sell themselves for a green card. Most of the women go into these relationships with the best of intentions and if the relationship fails they are rewarded by being accused of being a green card shark whore"

"At least half of relationships that end are the men{s fault and just because a latina ends a relationship does not mean that she is necessarily insincere."

"Green card shark (whores)are few and far between and I don{t think we are doing justice to the women involved by perpetuating the myth."

Ok, so we fundamentally agree. Then why is this forum loaded with "I married her in Barranquilla after two months, let her in on my savings account, and now she is sleeping with a barranquillero her own age" stories? Why do we read sob stories and "How can I get a divorce?" stories every other day?

Again, I don't blame the women, I blame the men. For many men on her a colombiana is either a naive, Third World, sexy, spicy, exotic mestiza/mulata primative that he can control until things go wrong. When things turn out bad, she is a suddenly a conniving whore gold digger who will suck a golfball through a garden hose for a green card. Well, maybe if these men weren't so self-centered and had developed some self-esteem and social skills they wouldn't need to travel across the world for a girlfriend. They set themselves up for this. People warn them, they do what they want, they pay the price, and then we have to listen to them cry a river about how they got played.

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:39:

Re: CaliPro "But I don{t believe that there are many colombianas willing to sell themselves for a green card. Most of the women go into these relationships with the best of intentions and if the relationship fails they are rewarded by being accused of being a green card shark whore"

"At least half of relationships that end are the men{s fault and just because a latina ends a relationship does not mean that she is necessarily insincere."

"Green card shark (whores)are few and far between and I don{t think we are doing justice to the women involved by perpetuating the myth."

Ok, so we fundamentally agree. Then why is this forum loaded with "I married her in Barranquilla after two months, let her in on my savings account, and now she is sleeping with a barranquillero her own age" stories? Why do we read sob stories and "How can I get a divorce?" stories every other day?

Again, I don't blame the women, I blame the men. For many men on her a colombiana is either a naive, Third World, sexy, spicy, exotic mestiza/mulata primative that he can control until things go wrong. When things turn out bad, she is a suddenly a conniving whore gold digger who will suck a golfball through a garden hose for a green card. Well, maybe if these men weren't so self-centered and had developed some self-esteem and social skills they wouldn't need to travel across the world for a girlfriend. They set themselves up for this. People warn them, they do what they want, they pay the price, and then we have to listen to them cry a river about how they got played.

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:43:

Re: BAQ "Calipro wrote in response to something I said: "Guys that jump to this conclusion are ones that have had absolutely no luck with younger women an thus are forced into believing that the other guy must be paying for it left and right"

MY response: This just not true.

There is no way you can sit there with a strait face and deny that the ONLY thing an 18yr old girl and a 50 yr old man have in common is Sex and money, or she is looking for a "Daddy"

You hit the clavo on the head, BAQ.

"If you think I am incorrect, then please explain WHY these same 50 year old men don;t have 18yr old novia's in American, Canada, England ect."

Right agin!


"The answer is simple, 95% of the girls in America, Canada, England ect are much better off financially and don;t need a 50 year old guy and his money. Where in Colombia, due to economics, these 18 yr olds get a much better life financially with an older, financially secure gringo. Again, if I am wrong, please explain why you don;t see these same Colombian girls at the mall with 50 year old Colombian men of little means. These are relationships driven by money, which is FINE, but again, call it what it is, "A financial arrangement"."

You win the grand prize. But what do I know? I'm just crazy gringa who is jealous and need to rain on the parades of 55 year old, overweight American men and their 19 year old fiancees.

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:45:

BxUnika

i 100% agree with all you say! bravo! however, i read this site daily and virtually never write on it. Perhaps we women should start contributing something to it, say something interesting, boot out the tossers purely by our interesting conversation.....there is so much drivel here and it is thoroughly boring. i have no idea why i read it, honest. the arguments between petulant little boys over, let's face it, who has the bissgest willy, is just beyond the joke. so come on girls, humiliate these fellas off the site or to contribute something worthy by getting wise ourselves and helping make the site better...

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:46:

biggest willy, sorry

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aztec says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:48:

helen please... ...post more often. We need your perspective. Just remember to not take umbrage when someone disagrees.

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:49:

one must learn to rise above taking umbrage

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:51:

Thanks, Helen I read about 75% of what is posted but I have unfortunately not been to Colombia yet, so I have less to speak on (except for the Colombians in the US experience, maybe). I like to learn...make that love to learn and it really detracts from the meaning of this site when this type of thing is all we hear.

Or perhaps I should stoop to their level and do nothing but post pictures of and discuss the details of my relationship with my bogotano boyfriend who lives in Queens.

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calipro says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:54:

BAQ (Calipro, I NEVER said or implied they were whores. I was only pointing out the reason these 18 yr olds are attaching themselves to much older men.)

BAQ

I applaud your diplomacy but lets not split hairs. If a woman is spending quality time a guy primerily for financial gain then she is a whore plan and simple.

I don{t know where the heck you are living in Colombia but if you haven{t seen 18 year old with a 50 old colombiano in Cali you haven{t been looking very hard. It isn{t the most common thing but there are plenty of early 20 year old women going out with 40 to 50 year old guys all the time. I know a 34 year old colombiano that has a 16 year old girlfriend which I even find a bit disturbing but it{s the life here.

(What I DO think is rediculous is that same man thinking be is the cats meow and living under a dilusion that "She loves me for me".)

Call me dumb or stupid if you must. But I really have no choice but to believe she loves me for me. My only other alternative is to believe is sleeping with me because I bought her a nice dinner and took her to the movies.

If you don{t believe me, meet me in Cali and I{ll show you around.

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 15:56:

BxUnika


don´t stoop. there are loads of us who feel the same. so let's chat

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calipro says on Sep 17, 2005, 16:02:

Hold on boys...... It looks like helen has been drinking again. LOL !!!

And she's planning a fillabuster with Bx. hehehe !!!!

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 16:04:

calipro

you are so right hhahahahahahahhahaha, nothing like a fews glasses of vino to oil the whinge pipes

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BAQ says on Sep 17, 2005, 16:15:

You are misunderstanding what I am trying to say.

I will give you two models:

Model 1, 18 yr old has 25 yr old Colombian boyfriend, outlook financially is dim, novio still lives with mom & dad, has a low wage or no job. Novia likes the guy but worries about any long term relationship due to his ability to provide for her.

Model 2, 18 yr old has 50 yr old gringo boyfrield, financially secure, owns home, good job or retired on a good pension. SHE KNOWS with the gringo if she gets married, she doesn;t have to worry about the electricity getting cut off, if there will be food in the refrigerator, money for cloths ect.

Take that same girl from model # 1, introduce her to a 25 yr old Colombian who has a very good job and is financially secure and she will be more inclined to look at him as a potential husband.

What I am trying to say is for a majority of these girls, the name of the game is SURVIVAL. When you speak in terms of culture, these girls are given a back seat to 95% of the jobs to their male counterparts, many never had a chance for a good education ect.

EVERYONE wants the feeling of security and an outlook for a decent life. What I have been trying to say is a majority of these young girls are are finding that security in older gingo;s, something the younger Colombian men are not able to provide. So in that context, it is still motivated by money. Do some of these girls actually love these older Gringo's, YES, but there are also some who will attach themselves to ANYONE with a decent bank account not because they are whores, but because they see it as their ticket out of a life of poverty.

Semper Fidelis !

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 16:21:

that´s not the point...the point bx is making is about this website. it´s a mess. full of crap. arguments between posters, gross guys seeking women. yes there are men genuinely looking for women but this isn't the place to do it. full stop, ya esta! enough! this site wasn´t designed for that sort of business. there are other places to go to seek out women. the thing that grosses me out is that it's the same guys every day responding to these questions. then they complain about it.....

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BAQ says on Sep 17, 2005, 16:22:

Forgot, I am living in Barranquilla. Maybe things on the coast are different than down south. LOL

Semper Fidelis !

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Desideria (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Sep 17, 2005, 16:25:

hey BxUnika a good thread and helen you're alright too..just got back home and will post a bit later too.
Cheers,
Desi

A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 16:27:

What's I'd Like I was looking through the archives and at the beginning there were so many interesting topics even though the member base was smaller. Now look at it. We have a bunch of people yet the level of quality has diminished severely. What gives?

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:16:

Bx (does that mean you're in the Bronx?)

I noticed you started some threads about things you'd like to talk about. Maybe that's the quickest fix to the problem. Hard to turn a sombrero search into one of the aforementioned topics.

Apart from that, maybe a section on relationships might be the best answer. The thing is, starting a new relationship with anyone, particularly interculturally, can be a stressful or anxious time for anyone. That's why you get so many guys that want to talk about it.

Furthermore, I'd suspect the reason you don't have so many Colombianas writing in about it is twofold 1) the average Colombiana doesn't have a computer at home, they'd have to go to a cafe, which leads into reason 2) even if they Googled a site that talked about Colombia, PBH would come up with a description in English. There are plenty of forums completely in espanol, I've seen them. Sometimes I do my searches with yahoo.es for specifically that reason. But again, access to a computer and/or the Internet is an issue, and English is an issue. That's why you typically don't see the gringo skirt chaser trolling Spanish forums, either.

And finally, men are men. In my experience, 95% of male/male communication deals with: sports, women, work, politics, or money.

Art, culture, music, food, and scenery just are not topics we generally use to start conversations, Colombiano or gringo.

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:21:

women talk about sports, work, politics and money too you know

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kernow62 says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:28:

helen your idea might fly, but I don't recall you posting anything on PBH except on this thread. Put your plan to action, let's see some of those interesting topics.

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ws244 says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:34:

women talk Woman also use foul language more then men, mainly because they never shut up, keep double talking in circles, and run out of words in their uneducated vocabulary..

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helen says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:37:

ok, ws244, you have proved the point for everyone....there is a moron amongst us.....bye everyone

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ws244 says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:46:

moron No, no one is a moron, just a fact of life with women, except for the uneducated part which was a setup.

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calipro says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:48:

BAQ I think you are on to something when you say that survival plays a role in the decisions that some of these girls make but I believe in is more on a subconsious or cultural level.

Do not believe that young girls are going out with older guys that they don't really like thinking that they are going to get ahead in life. Girls see young girls going out with older guys their whole life and just end up thinking it's OK IMHO.

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:48:

Hey Kernow...about Helen I was just thinking the same thing about Helen. By comparative standards, this woman has been a member longer than 9 out of 10 people here (1 year 29 weeks) yet, I have never seen any post of hers prior to today.

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:51:

She had Tipsy Tirade the othe She had a Tipsy Tirade the other day on another thread. It bascially contained the same argumentative tone.

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jack smith 2 says on Sep 17, 2005, 17:51:

Bxunika Why shouldn't the fellows who go ar have gone to Colombia either just looking for love and or marriage post here? Unfortunately, most of the world is afraid of Colombia due to the poor image of la coca.

I would not generalize about the marriage agencies in Colombia and or the women or the men. I have been in another Colombian forum and I met a few Americans in Colombia at these places and they are a very varied lot as are the women in Colombia. I met quite a few women in Colombia from 18 to about 35 and yes some were way too young for me but that was just me. No chemistry! No different than dating here!

Bxunika, every fellow who goes to Colombia has his own personal reason for going. Yes, some go to get "serviced" and others go just to give it a chance. Around %50 of the fellows are divorced and yes are tired of American women. The problem Bxiunka is that we are very closed in the USA. We go from car to building and back to car. In Latin America, people walk, they take the bus etc etc. It can be easier to meet women in Latin America if you speak the language. I do! But even if he ddoesn't marriages can work. I know a guy married to a Honduran and he was set up and he spoke no Spanish aand she spoke no English and they have been married like 18 years and have two kids. In ffact, I know quite a few Hispana/Gringo couples going strong!

Bxiunka, we did an informal poll a while back to see what marriages had lasted between gringos and Latinas...gues what Bxunika? It was about a %50 divorce rate...about the same or maybe a little lower than it is here.

Finally, Bxiunka, way too many Latin women have told me that they like the GRINGO because he is more loyal and will not cheat as easily as the Don Juan Latino macho? I don't know how much of this is true but I believe there is something there....?

Anyway, the guys here in this forum who have gone to Colombia 5,10,15 times have a lot to offer this forum. I would get over your hangup and find another forum if this bothers you. I visi this forum once in a while then I disappear.......adios!

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ws244 says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:07:

#2 Right, and the difference between the doers and talkers, is the doers are at least doing something, while the talkers are sitting in their ivory towers far from Colombia preaching as little gods and goddesses about the nonvirtues and inequities of the dirty old men, yet having done nothing for their mother country and peoples except to run away and hide in ours, or to the country of the most distinguished liberal social democrats the Canadians to our north. Well more about the expat Canadians in our country later as some of them are just as guilty.

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miamimike says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:11:

Would be interesting to see how many Men of any Age would travel to Colombia if they did not have some attractive women. NOT to say there are not as many or more Attractve Ladies in other Latin Countries such as Brazil, Venezuela, Argentina. Someone should start a thread and see the responses as to why(priorities) people travel to Colombia. I know for Me the Colombian Ladies are the LAST priority.I am straight BTW, no soy un Pato! First is the Fantastic Scenery,Culture, very reasonaable, high quality medical procedures and Food. Hell, if a guy wants to meet a Colombian Woman, I live in Miami where 1000s of Colombianas live-why in the Hell would I travel 2500 miles for someone I can meet in my backyard?? I wait until they procure a Visa on their own and travel to Miami on/under their own steam and money. My immediate neighbors on both sides of my Condo are Colombian. I met my Colombian Novia(who died 5 years ago)here in Florida.This has always been a perplexing issue for me.Long distance serious relationships. My humble opinion and .02 only!

No hay Peor Ciego que el que no quiere Ver o Sordo que el que no quiera Oir--Sarah Palin, Wasilla Alaska

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utopiacowboy says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:18:

BxUnika, before you get carried away, I have NEVER posted on that other board and I doubt that the people whose handles you see being used are really the same people as on PBH. That forum is a open sewer on the Internet and I'd like to have it bombed.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:21:

Jack Smith I think that was a GREAT post. Bxunika for some reason has her own ax to grind. Look Bunika, I have very clearly voiced my feelings, about these relationships. And I have taken quite a bit of heat for it. But my feelings were based on explaining what I percieve the difficulty that two different people have mergeing their lives when they come from two different cultures. But I never, and would never go so far as to say that most American men fit some particular sterotype, physically or age wise, and that the only reason they venture down to Colombia is to find a young Colombian Hottie to expoit and / or control as you seem to be implying. That really is not a fair sterotype at all.

Bxunika, what you also seem to be losing site of is that Colombian women have to sacrifice a lot to come to this country. They have to leave an entire life behind...family, parents, and siblings just to begin a life with a man that by American standards, she barely knows well enough to marry. They know each other only to the extent that their language barriers, perspectives on life, and limited quality time together will allow them to move forward. I think it is an up hill battle, but......I don't think it is fair to stereotype and say that the man has bad intentions to begin with. That is just way to presumptuous, and you are forming your opinion based upon a few posts that you have seen here. That is just silly and you need to reconsider your opinion, and question the preconcieved notions you have about men traveling to Col., when you have no reliable evidence to make an informed opinion

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:25:

Mike you have to remember that you are unique in that you live in an area where there is a Colombian popluation. I've only met 2 in my 20 years in LA.

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:29:

Cam ...only 2 in 20 years in LA...??? For God sakes man. Where do you live in a bubble? Which LA do you live in. LA is the second largest city of Mexicans in the world. In fact, Mexicans/Mexican Americans are the majority there.....So...how did you only meet 2?

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BAQ says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:31:

MiamiMike Man, if women are your LAST priority, we need to talk. Please let me remind you Viagara can be purchased WITHOUT an RX in Colombia, hahahaha

JUST KIDDING WITH YA !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Semper Fidelis !

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:32:

One of the most profound clauses we've seen in a while was G5's "by American standards".

The truth is, historically, the concept of dating someone for 2-3 years and this investigative approach to ascertaining whether someone might make an appropriate spouse is less than a century old.

For the rest of human history, marital decisions were made with less than what the criticized gringos are putting into their relationships.

Heck, several cultures still have arranged marriages. That custom has survived for centuries, with a lower divorce rate than ours.

Yes arranged marriages have difficulties, but at the heart the man and woman understand that they are going to build a life together, which means that some adaptation will be required on both parts. Here in the U.S., if we're unhappy, we just leave.

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:38:

G5, there are millions of Mexicans here; I have plenty of friends/acquaintances that are of Mexican descent. I understood Mike to be talking about Colombians, of which there are very few in LA.

I was always curious about that. Here you have Colombia, a South American country, much of which is warm. Yet when Colombians relocate to North America, more of them settle in places like NYC, Chicago, and even Canada than the Southwest. Miami makes sense since it would feel more like home. But if I were born and raised in balmy Cartagena, the LAST place I'd relocate is somewhere that gets anywhere south of 50 degrees Fahrenheit. Yet we have only a small handful here. We have more Central Americans than Colombians, too. I don't understand that.

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 18:49:

But Cam..you are not telling the whold story..not at all Let me give you the real story about why in cultures there are fixed marraiges, there are low divorces. There are two reasons for that.

The first reason is that in countries where there are fixed marraiges, those marraiges are based on religious practice and custom. At the same time, their laws are are NOT based on secular thought. Their laws, including those governing divorce are a reflection of their religion and culture. Pakistan is the best example I know of. In Pakistan, the marraiges are arranged almost always. The family pressure dictates to the woman that she must aquiesce to this practice or be cast out of the family. Now, do you think that once you marry someone in Pakistan, it is as easy to get a divorce as it is here in the US? I suppose you think that Pakistan has something called "no fault divorce" where all a woman has to do is walk into a court and say "we have irreconcilable differneces" and that we have been living seperate and apart for 6 months (you can still live together and still be seperate and apart) and ...just like that, she is divorced. Let me tell you, in countries like Pakistan it is almost impossible to get a divorce. In many countries like this, you often need the husband's permission to do so.


Speaking of Pakistanis and Indian people, that leads to my second reason and that is that they are the UK's largest minority. Even there, a country that operates under civil law, free from the influence of the church (ostensibly) Pakistanis still cannot obtain a divorce as easily as a run of the mill British person can. Sure they can from a legal perspective. But the family pressure that is imposed to try and prevent the woman from doing so are enormous. She could be cast out of the family. The man would have to be a really bad guy for her family (her family) to allow her to move forward with a divorce.

So, when you say that arranged marraiges have a lower divorce rate, make sure you tell the real story as to why that is the case. And that is that it is much harder to get a divorce to begin with, thus making the divorce rate much lower. The variable are different as I have just clearly explained

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:03:

I agree and am familiar with what you outlined. But look at the scenario that they've created:

For religious, social, and legal reasons, once they're in the marriage, it is far more difficult to get out than it is in Western cultures. They have these structures in place to enforce a vow that is common even in our culture "Till death do us part."

I believe that if you decide to get married, you are making a commitment and I believe in the concept of vows. A vow is not an emotional statement based on how you feel today. The concept of vows is ancient, dating to when a man's worth, integrity, social standing, and respect was based on his word.

So, whether the pressure to stay in the marriage is religious, social, or legal, or in the idyllic case of and individual actually trying to keep his word, both scenarios "burn the bridge" so to speak. There is no going back. That's what marriage was meant to be.

When the bridge is burned, you come to the realization that you're going to have to make do with what you have, for better or for worse (more than a coincidence that this is part of the traditional marriage vow). Psychologically, this produces an entirely different approach to conflict resolution, growth, mutual understanding, etc.

These days, since the vows don't mean much anymore in practice, the bridge isn't really burned. We run right back across it when the going gets tough.

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:04:

Why do the Colombians "go north" to the cold? That is an easy answer. The same reason the Puerto Ricans do the same thing. The largest Puerto Rican poupulation settled in New York and Chicago respectively. It's hotter in Puerto Rico than most of Colombia, and their second city is NY. It's called money. To this day, you earn much more money in NY or Chicago than you ever will in Miami. If you are a doctor or a lawyer, that's different. But most first generation Colombian who came here and sought residency, went to NY to take "blue collar" jobs that to this day still pay better in NY or Chicago than they do in Miami. Needlesss to say, as those communities grew, futrue Colombians who came here, and second generation Colombian Americans that were born here, made the communities grow even larger. Take any job, ANY job, and I will say with certainty, that you will earn more doing that job in Chicago than you do in Miami. One reason for that is that almost everything is unionized here. Florida is a "right to work" state, so the pay scale is much lower. Man, the janitors who work in all the downtown high rises...sweeping the floors and emptying paper baskets make $18.75 an hour!! with 4 weeks paid vacation, 12 sick days (1 per month) and 11 holidays per year. Do you think that a person in Miami earns that??? Not even close. Bus drivers here earn between 50 and 60 K a year. Do you think they earn that in Miami or some other warm weather city??? Forget it.

Look, if you are going to come here, you are going to go where the monsy is.

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:05:

For the record, I did not try to intentionally withhold part of the story. I was more concerned with the result (fewer divorces) than the reasons. And this is not to advocate arranged marriages, only to illustrate that the American standard of dating for 2-3 years, basically an extended interview of the partner, is a relatively new concept.

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:08:

Well, OK I buy the "follow the money" argument vs Miami because I don't know what jobs pay in Miami or Chicago.

The question was why NOT the Southwest? The pay here is good enough for millions of Mexican immigrants, why not Colombians?

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bobbyb says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:16:

I wrote a bunch of stuff on this subject but I guess I took too long and got timed out. I forgot most of what I wrote except that statiscally the age difference of 20 years is the most succesfull relationship, like 30 and 50 not 18 and 40. If anyone has contridictory information please let me know

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:17:

Cam...I agree with you...but A couple of points:

1. The women's mov. has amended those vows. They don't like the "to death do us part" Even more so, they hate, and I mean hate, "love,honor, cherish and ........OBEY vow." My cousin recently got married and she was married by a traditional priest who administered the vows, and when it came to that part, she was caught off guard so she started to squirm and giggle but she refused to say obey. She just said love, honor and cherish, and skipped the obey.

2. To mitigate the problems created by easy access (no fault) divorce, at least one state created something called the "super marraige". I believe they are both souther states. In this scenario, you elect to enter a "super marraige" as opposed to a regular marraige. Upon doing so, you automaticaly waive your right to a divorce using some of the more easier avenues like no-fault divorces, and the only way you can obtain a divorce is by the more traditional fault grounds that one must has to proove. Examples of such are things like" Adultry,bygamy, desertion,imprisonment, STD from other person, insanity..etc.

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Diez Y Siete says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:32:

Super marraige? Ive never heard of that, but i think thats how all marraiges should be, it would prevent alot of problems and it wouldnt be walked into as lightly.

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adrimm (Moderator) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:32:

Well pbhers I've been out all day and skimmed this thread with some interest.. I have to say that I share many of the same concerns that BXUn and Helen are expressing.

I was just musing to myself how seldom we seem to see non-Colombian couple travelers asking questions about visitng Colombia etc. There

does seem to be some disproportionate representation going on here. I'd also agree that the lack of internet-able computers as a common household items in Colombia (like say, a telephone, or iron), as well as the language barrier do a fabulous job of insulating english pbh from what the group who are increasingly becoming the most common topic.

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:33:

The South west still pays less There are many differences between Mexicans and Colombian. The list can go on forever. But consider this, to Gringos, all us Latinos are ...jsut that Latinos. The Whites who are on this forum are in a whole different group. They have a genuine interest in Latin culture. Most of the time from what I have seen, the interest stems from the fact that they are dating, engaged or married to someone. That is a fact.

That said, Latinos are not so understanding of each other. In the undergound and legitimate job economy, everybody takes care of their own. The Southwest is dominated by Mexicans and Mexican Americans. I don't know the last time you have been to El Paso Texas or anywhere in that area, but I can assue you that Mexican Americans outnumber Americans by......who knows. Anyway, Mexicans, like to take care of their own. In a tight job market, what Mexican is going to give a job to a Colombian when he has his own people that he can take care of. You have to be Latino to understand it. We talk different. We think different. Our humor is different.

Now you are probably thinking the jobs should go to the best applicant. Forget it. If you think that way, you are wrong my man. I'll give you a great example and it happened only a month or so ago. Here in Chicago, the two largest Latino communities are Mexican and Puerto Rican. All the public schools in the Latino neighborhoods have either a Mexican American or Puerto Rican principal who hires the teachers. My Colombian friend who is a bilingual teacher said, he is really getting screwed here because when he goes to the schools he finds that the Mexicans all get hired by the Mexican pricipals, and the Puerto Ricans all get hired by the PR principals. He joked, but with an element of seriousness, "Can someone find me a Colombian principal so I can get a job."

So the bottom line is, Colombians have to go where they have the best opportunities. You are also forgetting that they want a place more like home. DO you have any idea how many Colombian restaurants and clubs and store there are in Queens New York? So it is a cultural thing too. When you are in a foreign country, you want to be in a place that feels like home....and the US Southwest is not one of those places.

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Rubiazo says on Sep 17, 2005, 19:43:

I find it kinda funny Every time you have a forum on the net, you have idiots. Period. You can try to legislate them out of the forum, but it never works. Engaging in lots of control over content often ends up backfiring and chasing away serious posters.
BxUnika if you really wanted to kick off everybody who offended someone we would have ZERO posters. I know I would be gone in two flat seconds! But try looking at all the useful stuff I've posted as well. I am actually pulling a lot of punches on here, but not to avoid offending people, mainly to ptrotect the innocent and avoid damaging the reputations of the unsuspecting :))))
But for that matter, I find your posts just as offensive as those of the pathetic skirt-chasrs on here. Sometimes I find Desi's posts offensive too, with her moralizing. But I would never think of having either of you silenced. Desi may rub me the wrong way at times, but she consistently makes positive contributions here. Frankly BxUnika, up until now with your excellent suggestion of creating a directory of NYC Colombian businesses, you havent done much on this forum either!
The rules to this forum are very simple and they come up every time you post. As far as I am concerned talking about drugs and prostitution is VERY relevant to this board, because they are a big part of society both in Colombia and the US, and they play a big part in the relationships between the two countries, whatever one may think of these things. Not once has anything I posted caused a problem with a moderator, why, because I FOLLOW THE RULES here.
If you want to improve this forum, I suggest you stop attacking everything that offends you. You have personally broken the rules here more times than I can count by jumping in and flaming people. Try counting to 10 and repeating 'no personal attacks' between each number next time you post, just a suggestion. Ironically, you call attention to these threads by doing so.

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 20:08:

Funny Mario.... This BxUnika writes an entire thread that should really blow your top.I suggest you read her stereotype about the type of American men that marry Colombianas. By the way, I DO NOT AGREE WITH HER. And the only thing you find objectionable here on page 2, is my statement that there are more Mexican Americans in the "South West" (I like it that way).....and ahhhh that I cannot spell South West correctly.

So...Great Post..it's very germane.

It's too bad I have to pack to go out of town in the AM, I thought maybe you would like to try and get this thread locked up too. Who knows, maybe we can set a record at this? But it will not be today. BTW, Cam and I had some good debate. See how some people move on??? Can you ?? I guess not.

Tino earlier already declared us like water an oil. You can be the oil. I'll be the water. Water tends to mix well with everything (everyone)

Maybe I spelled something wrong so you can start on that again. Did you ever consider a second career as a spell checker? You seem to have a knack for it.

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kernow62 says on Sep 17, 2005, 20:24:

I think Mario should be the water, he is a cool character like a nice cool glass of water in the Texas sun.

Anyway Gomez you wouldn't want to be water would you? You might claim someone was calling you wishy washy, or all washed up. No I think you should be the oily one. Not that I am calling you a slippery character, lest you think I am making a personal attack.

Perhaps PBH should be the "engine", water cooling the "engine" and oil keeping things sliding smoothly along.

How's that for diplomacy? Do you think I have a career as a diplomat?

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 20:26:

at Gomezman "I don't think it is fair to stereotype and say that the man has bad intentions to begin with. That is just way to presumptuous, and you are forming your opinion based upon a few posts that you have seen here"

To reply to you, I would suggest you go back and read ALL of my posts here. Obviously you did not because I didn't say everyone was in hat situation, nor would I. There is a big difference between a 25 year old American who coincedentally met a Colombian woman on the internet by chance or oas an exchange student and a thrice-divoreced man who is publicly damning American women on here and is pursuing much-younger Colombian women IN Colombia.

I don't have to assume anything about thse people who talk about their relationship as if it were an open book because they already have it all set out on the table for everyone to see. I'm not talking about the members here who are married or dating (I know there is at least one American man/Colombian woman married couple here who posts) people close in age or at least don't discuss every detail of their relationships on here with everyone to see.

I guess my point went completely over your head...

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BxUnika says on Sep 17, 2005, 20:42:

"I was just musing to myself how seldom we seem to see non-Colombian couple travelers asking questions about visitng Colombia etc. There does seem to be some disproportionate representation going on here".

Exactly. Where are the Colombian/American success stories? Where are the Colombian women? Where are the young, bachelor 20 to early 30s- something who are dating/marrying colombianas? Why aren't they here? I think all of you can read between the lines and come to your own conclusion. I know there are American men who date/marry Colombian women without power, money, sex, and low self-esteem coming into play. WHY aren't they here to share?

And notice that a few of the same people who do nothing but talk about "the hot paisas, caleñas, and costeñas" are the ones throwing stones at me? Is there nothing more to a Colombian woman that her face, breasts, ass, and how she is in bed? It ceretainly seems that way more often than not. Notice when newbies come on here they want to know where the hottest, sexiest Colombian women are, NOT even where the smartest, most well-educated, friendliest colombianas are? It speaks for itself. You can't alibi that

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bobbyb says on Sep 17, 2005, 20:47:

I heard the girls in Pereira were the smartest so I got me one of them

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miamimike says on Sep 17, 2005, 21:09:

BAQ, You did not read my post correcctly-Ja Ja If you did you would see where I clearly wrote "Why travel like 2500 miles to meet Colombian Women when I can do that in my own Backyard? And I do! When I go the trouble of taking a Vacation, its for a NEW Adventure, not Old Hat Neighborhood stuff! Many Tabernas here, where if one desires, You can meet any type of Colombian woman you desire. As many as you want! True, your game here will have to be up to or Past Par because what suffices for meeting a Colombian Woman in SA many times will not suffice here or NYC. One will need to do more then Tape a Ben Franklin $100 Bill to his forehead! Much Cheaper here BTW.I am not into that Fiancee Visa Business or any signing any Affadavits of Support either. Been there, done that in 1991. Learned from my mistake.

No hay Peor Ciego que el que no quiere Ver o Sordo que el que no quiera Oir--Sarah Palin, Wasilla Alaska

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cam0940 says on Sep 17, 2005, 21:25:

Bx asked:

"Exactly. Where are the Colombian/American success stories? Where are the Colombian women? Where are the young, bachelor 20 to early 30s- something who are dating/marrying colombianas? Why aren't they here? I think all of you can read between the lines and come to your own conclusion. I know there are American men who date/marry Colombian women without power, money, sex, and low self-esteem coming into play. WHY aren't they here to share?"

I'm 33. I post. I told my girlfriend about PBH as well, and she from time to time has comments but she doesn't have a computer and frankly doesn't have a good enough command of English to participate. This is what I was trying to say earlier. I'm not making this up, you can find Colombianas in Spanish forums. PBH is mostly English.

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BAQ says on Sep 17, 2005, 21:48:

OK Miamimike OK man, you started to scare me there for a moment - hahaha

Semper Fidelis !

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Rubiazo says on Sep 17, 2005, 21:52:

I'm 32 And I'm also very interested in Bogotá as a possible place to live. NYC is out of the question in the long term for my gf anyways, for so many reasons.
Most of the regulars here don't fit your silly profile at all. I really don't know why a few hens get so upset over a couple idiotic posts, by non-regulars.
UC is hardly looking for pussy in Colombia. He is living out his Brady Bunch fantasy, and God bless him.
I met Neonovo the other night. He is a Paisa who goes back and forth a lot between here and Florida. His wife and he are peas in a pod.
Franko is 62 and his gf is 48. I met him personally too. Very very nice guy. Very into his gf.
GIB according to Franko is one of the last people on earth you would want to mess with. He's hardly following some prepago around the Unicentro on a scooter. Plus he has lived here for 2 years now.
Then there's Webmanco, born here lived in Miami came back because of the food, the people, the music.
Then there's G5 who himself is Colombian.
The list goes on and on. I don't know where you get your 50-75% from!

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Gomezman5 says on Sep 17, 2005, 22:22:

No Mario...,.distorted facts I did not bring up your personal life...until when????? until when????
Until when???.. I will help you remember. I did that ONLY after you sent made a post attacking me for my opinion as to the longevity of the type of marraiges that are being talked about here. I never even mentioned your name. Then you followed it up with a series of nasty emails. ...Really nasty emails...And here you go again. ("A" hole, f***k, same thing) Why not just say the words. It does not seem to bother Tinto or Peter for that matter. If it did, you would have refrained.

As to me mixing well or not mixing well...I'm mixing. I have my admirers and my detractors. You can't make everyone love you. Can you?
Mario, I sent the peace flag up to you in a a PM. You fired back, get lost. Mario, I don't know what you do, but I can assure you, in my postion, I argue for a living and I get paid for it. And after every argument, whether it be in court, on the phone, or in a hearing, I can wallk into the bar, the coffee shop, or eatery, and we can laugh and joke, talk about sports, or whatever,as if the argument never happened. If I couldn't move on, I would have been out of business about 15 years ago.

So Mario, for you to say that I still hold a grudge is silly. You through out the first punch this evening. The very first thing you posted on this thread was to tell me how you did not like the way I spelled South West. 100 posts are made, many controversial ones. Many you would agree with and many you would not. But what was your first contribution???? It was how I cannot spell again. Mario, Mario, that sounds really concilatory doesn't it?

In fact to make my point, cam and I had some very thought provoking debate. And as you know, cam and I have had our days too.

OK Mario, I will try again....like I do in real life, I will take the "high road". I'll drop the sarcasm.(Even though there is no rule prohibiting that), and you drop the the foul language and we say...peace.....Paz. Shalom. Fair enough? What do you think?

You are ok. I am ok. Good luck with your Colombianita. Many happy and healthy years to the both of you. Now, how much nicer can I be than that?

Accept? And this is offered with the utmost seriousness.....here and now for all to see.

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Lennox says on Sep 17, 2005, 23:53:

Welcome to the internet Any internet forum is going to have some posts that are not agreeable to one’s tastes. This forum is merely reflecting the many Gringo males that travel to Colombia in search of a girlfriend or wife. A cursory evaluation shows that you have made a few posts to this website asking for information on such enthralling topics such as how to buy airline tickets. Maybe if you made some posts you could bring more interesting information to the site. Spare us the indignation and post some real information about Colombia. By the way, first you need to visit. Flights are very cheap so I’m not sure why you haven’t visited, unless you are afraid like most of the world. Colombia is one of the most interesting places I have ever visited so I highly recommended going.

Of course some posters may fit the stereotypical fat bald loser you outlined but many are not quite the type you suggested. Personally I am not interested in reading the sordid situations of men seeking wives anymore than you. The one concern you raise which is legitimate is that PBH is very high on google when you search for some Colombian information. Therefore I believe it is fair to wonder how the daily discussions portray Colombia to a casual visitor curious about Colombia.

In your post you said that it speaks volumes about the fact that men will travel thousands of miles to meet a person to marry. Maybe it speaks volumes about the qualities of the culture they are coming from. You ascribe only sinister qualities to a man who would marry a wife from a different culture and belittle all the men who find the more feminine and traditional Colombian women more interesting than the typical American feminist.

Yes, Colombian women do possess many qualities that are more attractive, namely they tend to be more family oriented, less materialistic, not extremely fat and disgustingly obese like many American women commonly are (highest obesity rate in the world). Many American women are bitter, angry and far too masculine. Of course many are not, and there are plenty of beautiful American women. However, it appears many men give up on the whole American female population. Some of these men go to Colombia.

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aztec says on Sep 18, 2005, 02:37:

I think Gomezman5... ...you are joking again. If you want to yank a Colombian's chain just call them Mexicans. At least for a Colombian who has spent some time in the States. (Reference your earlier suggestion to go to the South West to meet a Colombian).

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Desideria (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Sep 18, 2005, 03:43:

"Yes, Colombian women do possess many qualities that are more attractive, namely they tend to be more family oriented, less materialistic, not extremely fat and disgustingly obese like many American women commonly are (highest obesity rate in the world). Many American women are bitter, angry and far too masculine" (Lennox)

I attended a series of lectures last week about health and eating habits. We were shown a sequence animation of the percentage of US states with normal, overweight and grossly overweight population represented by different colors. Yes, I believe that Gringos are the most obese people on this planet. Only one addtional observation: the statistics were about the US population as a whole. Both men and women. Consequently, saying that the American women have the highest obesity rate in the world is telling only half of the truth. American men are just as obese, you forgot to mention that.

Cheers,
Desi

A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

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helen says on Sep 18, 2005, 06:02:

i am not from the US, I live in Colombia, i have been living and working in South America for 10 years. Stop jumping to conclusions.

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helen says on Sep 18, 2005, 06:25:

.........anyway, what a great post. Nice to see everyone getting along. Just one thing, I have been reading this site for a while and you are right, I haven´t posted much, a few times at the most. I shall from now on. I will thrill you all with my witty repartee and educated opinions. So often though I don´t get into things for this very reason, too may insulters here and it's a bit of a drag watching people's thoughts dragged apart by some pretty unpleasant posters. That is not the majority of you I add. I am not a burn my bra women's libber, niether am I here condemning the site or most of the contributers. I am purely expressing a point that there is too much junk here, that is all. Anyway....

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kernow62 says on Sep 18, 2005, 06:48:

Helen, I look forward to your forthcoming witty posts. I don't know how manny members PBH has, but there are only a small percentage who post on a regular basis. Like the posts or not they are active, that IMHO is what keeps the board going, if everyone were to lurk there would be no PBH. If you don't like a topic post something more interesting to take the viewers to your post. You will notice when a new more interesting post pops up, the old ones usually fall by the wayside quite quickly.

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greenday says on Sep 18, 2005, 07:06:

very simple If a member of this forum doesn't like a thread, just don't click on the thread to open it up and read it. I probably only read 10% of the threads here, only the ones that interest me. What is so hard about being selective??? OR, is BxUnika REALLY interested in these dating threads and not admitting it?? Reminds me of the people who bash the "National Enquirer", but when they are in line at the super market, they just can't resist picking up a copy.

This is a non-issue in my opinion for a few people who need to get a life...JUST DON"T CLICK ON THE THREAD...

Hell, I got bored with this thread after reading the first 10 posts and didn't even finish reading it.

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paisa29 says on Sep 18, 2005, 07:31:

I think this a good post, as a Colombian woman living here actually I do agree with Bxunica in somethings and sometimes I prefer not posting here because there are some (desocupados) members trying to be funny and screwing up the threads,I´ve found very interesting people in this website and most of that people don´t post for the same reason, then "Something Needs to Dramatically Change on This Website"
Girls please keep posting!

"Fill the earth with the light and warmth of hospitality" Conrad Hilton

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Crazy4Cali says on Sep 18, 2005, 08:26:

Nothing like a little more gasolina to help put out the fire Zowie! What a post. Ironic that the BxUnica complains about the low quality of postings by starting (and subsequently feeding) a post with a concentration of everything she finds bad about the site. And since this is not a dating site, yet BxUnica brought this up, I'm curious about her assertion that:

There is a big difference between a 25 year old American who coincedentally met a Colombian woman on the internet by chance or oas an exchange student and a thrice-divoreced man who is publicly damning American women on here and is pursuing much-younger Colombian women IN Colombia.

What exactly is the difference? and what is wrong with a "thrice-divorced man" finally figuring out he can't be in a relationship with a woman his age and that he might be better off with one much younger? That doesn't sound bad, simply pragmatic (assuming the women he's looking for are at least 18, of course). Just wondering, since you seem to have all the answers. But, if you want register your discontent about how much fighting and how the threads veer off-topic, doing so by posting a topic that is simply intended to just start a fight and then subsequently feeding the resulting fire places you in the same category as those you seek to damn (not that this needed to be pointed out to anyone but BxUnica, of course). Just pointing out that you could have made your point much more effectively. Better luck next time.

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ws244 says on Sep 18, 2005, 08:41:

not from the U.S. living in Colombia 10 years Well except for the foul language posts the prose is of american or canadian, so this person is probably a U.S. govt, Canadian govt. civil service worker living in Colombia. The prose indicates a somewhat younger person however.

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kernow62 says on Sep 18, 2005, 09:12:

ws244 I would say Helen is a Brit or possibly from Oz.

Doesn't matter either way where a person is from to me.

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kernow62 says on Sep 18, 2005, 09:13:

Mario well thought out response, more than I could be arsed to do. I think my one word posting was all I could manage.

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Mr. Hollywood says on Sep 18, 2005, 10:20:

Meta discussions are boring I keep most of my opinions on this subject to myself, but I will say that I'd rather Colombia have an international reputation for attractive, intelligent, open-minded women than the reputation it currently seems to enjoy as the global capital of crime and violence.

Personally, I think the opening of the "Visas" topic removed a lot of the endlessly boring (for the rest of us) nuts and bolts discussions of how to get one's Colombiana into the USA. In terms of other subjects, I've seen very little talk about sex tourism or anything like that.

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helen says on Sep 18, 2005, 10:28:

what foul langualge?????? crap is about as foul as i got. anyway, brit, not govt, journalist. young? 36. anything else? anyone want to guess my height?

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utopiacowboy says on Sep 18, 2005, 10:42:

My wife is the only Colombian in our little town but she has a lot of friends in the local Mexican-American community. In fact they are doing their utmost to help her a job and I hope they suceed in the next few weeks. I really don't understand why there are not more Colombians here. I think they would like it if they were as open-minded as my wife.

You crack me up with the "Brady Bunch" fantasy, Rubiazo. Very amusing.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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ws244 says on Sep 18, 2005, 11:46:

foul language Yes i see, living the Parke 93 Zona Zosa lifestyle, very fortuneate. My place is in the lesser district of Belmira.

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kernow62 says on Sep 18, 2005, 12:47:

UTC she doesn't have a job yet? What's she waiting for?

My wife's friend arrived in the US on a Thursday and had a job my Saturday, she didn't like it so she quit about two weeks later and found work within a day. The pay isn't peanuts either. No wonder Mexicans like coming to the US or even Texas.

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BAQ says on Sep 18, 2005, 13:12:

I agreen with Crazy4Cali I got to agree with his last post. There is nothing wrong with guys who are divorced coming down here and finding a nice Colombian woman and trashing Gringa's.

Personally, I wouldn;t touch a gringa again with a 10 foot pole. You couldn;t PAY ME to date a Gringa. Colombian women put Gringa's to shame and Gringas can't even come close to holding a candle to them, and it doesn;t have anything to do with age, it is their attitude, personality and disposition. Something Gringa's LACK. If ya want a "Soccer mom" who is so self absorbed in everything BUT her marriage, pick a Gringa. If ya want a wife who CARES about her marriage, then a Colombian woman is for you.

Semper Fidelis !

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utopiacowboy says on Sep 18, 2005, 14:17:

She could get a job cleaning or something similar but it wouldn't help her with her English. She needs a job where she can interact with people and be forced to practice her English. She got turned down a week ago for a job because her English wasn't good enough and this has motivated her to start practicing. The woman told her to come back in 3 months after her English improved. In the meantime she still has a few irons in the fire that I hope work out.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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kernow62 says on Sep 18, 2005, 16:13:

I was just screwing with ya, I understand completely, and I wish her all the best in this step.

My wife's friend spent years in Colombia and in Argentina planning for the day when she moved to the US and in all those years what did she do. Did she take English lessons? No way she took dancing, and cooking classes, she figured better to hook a husband than to learn something trivial like English. You know what, she moved here, hooked up with an Argentine guy and will never learn English. Her first job was with Colombians, her second job was with Colombians, all her customers are Latin. What a country.

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Sonny says on Sep 18, 2005, 19:13:

BxUnika If you yourself have never been to Colombia as you said then why is it you are so down on those that have? Have you ever had a group of friends over for a beer and talked. The conversations will always have differences between one and another. The forum is no different. We are talking. Sometimes it is a good talk and other times it is not so good. Same with your friends. If some dog took a dump on your waffle don't come here and tell us how bad things here are. Many of us enjoy the differences we read. It teaches us and helps to understand things better. You think this site needs a great change? If so add something to it other then what you just wrote for someone that has never been to Colombia.

Funny, because you seem to generate a lot of static on here as well. I can't recall a single post where you have seven said something of value. Of cusre you'd say that.

What did you just add to this post to make it better?? YOU JUST PISSED OFF A BUNCH OF PEOPLE. BUT! That is what you wanted to do right?? Have a good day and I hope the waffle taste better now.

Just taking life easy. I worked hard for it and deserve it and now doing it.

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BxUnika says on Sep 18, 2005, 20:04:

"Fat Gringas" "Yes, Colombian women do possess many qualities that are more attractive, namely they tend to be more family oriented, less materialistic, not extremely fat and disgustingly obese like many American women commonly are (highest obesity rate in the world). Many American women are bitter, angry and far too masculine"

I had tio laugh when I read this. You knwo which group has the highest rate of obesity in the US? Hispanics and Blacks, not European-Americans.

Secondly,w hat constitutes acting "masculine"? Oh, you must mean the fact that we will express our opinions and we don't have to marry a rich man to rise in the social ladder anymore.

But rest assured, most American women wouldn't want you anyway. ; )

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BxUnika says on Sep 18, 2005, 20:07:

Re: Paisa29 "I think this a good post, as a Colombian woman living here actually I do agree with Bxunica in somethings and sometimes I prefer not posting here because there are some (desocupados) members trying to be funny and screwing up the threads,I´ve found very interesting people in this website and most of that people don´t post for the same reason, then "Something Needs to Dramatically Change on This Website"
Girls please keep posting!"

Thank you. Notice how the true colors of many of thse posters come out? Now it's a anti-woman thing. Well, fine, because I'm not too impressed by many men on here either. There are a lot of men on here who I respect, but there are a lot of real losers here as well.

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BxUnika says on Sep 18, 2005, 20:12:

BAQ "I got to agree with his last post. There is nothing wrong with guys who are divorced coming down here and finding a nice Colombian woman and trashing Gringa's.

Personally, I wouldn;t touch a gringa again with a 10 foot pole. You couldn;t PAY ME to date a Gringa. Colombian women put Gringa's to shame and Gringas can't even come close to holding a candle to them, and it doesn;t have anything to do with age, it is their attitude, personality and disposition. Something Gringa's LACK. If ya want a "Soccer mom" who is so self absorbed in everything BUT her marriage, pick a Gringa. If ya want a wife who CARES about her marriage, then a Colombian woman is for you."

See, this is exactlyw hat I mean. Let me guess. You are some fat, balding loser who can't GET a gringa or got dumped by one and it hurt. Typical of this board. All i hear on hear is anti-women, anti-gringa rhetoric. Seems most of you just want a tight pussy and someone who you can control.

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BxUnika says on Sep 18, 2005, 20:23:

at Sonny "If you yourself have never been to Colombia as you said then why is it you are so down on those that have?"

It's not because they go to Colombia, it's because so many of tem go to Colombia for one thing. Now, you are a guy and seem intelligent...I bet you could guess what that might be.

"If some dog took a dump on your waffle don't come here and tell us how bad things here are. Many of us enjoy the differences we read."

It is interesting taht the vast majority of the posters are men and a good numbert of the threads and totally unrelated posts are about Colombianas. If so many women have agreed that this is overboard, doesn't that kind of tell you something.

"It teaches us and helps to understand things better. You think this site needs a great change?"

What does talking about where the prettiest Colombian women are and where to get laid the easiest teach us? Please elaborate.

"If so add something to it other then what you just wrote for someone that has never been to Colombia."

Well, from hwta I've seem with some people, I haven't left this country yet I bet I have as much knowledge if not more than so many men who are just looking for a 22 year old GF with lots of T & A. It's also funny that with all the time so many people on here claim to spend in Colombia, many of them can barely type in Spanish. I wonder why they never picked it up. I have never been to Colombia and can speak it.


"What did you just add to this post to make it better?? YOU JUST PISSED OFF A BUNCH OF PEOPLE. BUT! That is what you wanted to do right?? Have a good day and I hope the waffle taste better now."

No, I want somebody (Peter perhaps?) to either help cut down on these dumb posts or create another section for the "I Hate Gringas" and "I Am 55 and Looking for a Wife" clus to meet. I really don't care that you are pissed off. I'll bet if some of your supposed "girlfriends" and "wives" that you "love" so much could read a lot of what was written here, a lot of you would be singel right now. The lack of respect or regard for Colombian females (or apparently females in general) here is disgusting. You just live up to the "Ugly American" stereotype that most decent people want to avoid.

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Crazy4Cali says on Sep 18, 2005, 20:38:

So, what's a troll, again? could it be someone who posts inflammatory topics hoping to start a fire and then fans the flames with further incendiary posts?

Could it be BxUnika doing what she is so self-righteously accusing others of?

Noooooooooooooooooooooo........

Her's is righteous trolling.

Yet, I find I agree with her on one thing: stupid posts, like those complaining about stupid posts...like this one.
Oh, and those that make ad homenim attacks on those holding dissenting views...like this one.

For example.

I agree, those kind of people who post stupid threads with nothing to do about Colombia should be banished and those threads removed!

Like this one.

If you want to change things for the better, try starting with the person in the mirror.

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utopiacowboy says on Sep 18, 2005, 21:20:

So it's a bad thing if we want tight pussy? What if we have really small dicks? What if you're tired of hearing "Is it in yet?"

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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adrimm (Moderator) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Sep 18, 2005, 21:45:

Good solid and true responses BX An excerpt from BX's post:

"It teaches us and helps to understand things better. You think this site needs a great change?"

BX: What does talking about where the prettiest Colombian women are and where to get laid the easiest teach us? Please elaborate.

"If so add something to it other then what you just wrote for someone that has never been to Colombia."

BX: Well, from hwta I've seem with some people, I haven't left this country yet I bet I have as much knowledge if not more than so many men who are just looking for a 22 year old GF with lots of T & A. It's also funny that with all the time so many people on here claim to spend in Colombia, many of them can barely type in Spanish. I wonder why they never picked it up. I have never been to Colombia and can speak it.

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bondjames says on Sep 18, 2005, 22:51:

BAQ, I understand yo BAQ,

I understand your post about 18 year olds in the States or Canada not dating 50 year old men. Having lived both in Los Angeles and New York I can tell you this happens pretty often with the richer old men.

Young girls are not immune to living the "cinderella" dream. It is a pretty heady experience for a young girl to be pampered and spoiled by a man who can take her to nice restaurants and lives in a nice house. Even if the man is not spending much money on her. Just the thought that she can snag the man with the nice home and car and live the high life of never having to work is enough motivation .

that sort of "cinderella" dream can be a reality for a young girl in Colombia too. The Gringo stays in a nice hotel that cost a weeks salary for one night. Same thing will impress a young American girl. Gringo is the top 10% of men financially in her country and highly respected. No restaurant is too expensive. He travels whenever and as often as he wants to.Huge turn on for young women in the U.S. also.Gringo has friends that live in nice homes or has a nice apartment in her country , same thing that impresses young girls in the U.S. from Miami to Los angeles to NY or anywhere else. he is looked up to,respected by everyone around because he is perceived as somewhat special.The guys that seem to have the respect ,power and money gets the babes. The babes are anxious to date and marry these men and live the "cinderella" dream. The guy is a great catch and she does not want to let that go.

All is wonderful and both parties are happy.Problems happen IF there is a down grade in this vision of the "successful,powerful rich man". which is usually the case when he brings his "Cinderella" back home. the bubble will sometimes burtst if he cannot offer the same lifestyle.The younger she is,the more likely the downgarde will effect her.. She will eventually find out he is not the "star" amongs men. But an average guy.living an average life and not in the top 10% financial bracket anymore. For some it may have burst the bubble of who she thought she was marrying. Reality sinks in and some women will really be in love and not care. While others will think they were somehow tricked and feel resentful .hense some may call these girls scammers but I do not. It is just a girl who is very impressionable at her age and had her dreams of a "sweet life" turn into dust .

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emero says on Sep 19, 2005, 02:17:

I'm a lovely, graceful, gringa and I I have been on this forum long enough. There is a lot of women bashing going on full stop, a lot about sterotypical colombian and US/UK/European women

Can't some of the posters think about anything more intelligent than bashing women in general. ,unless I was in a upper class priveleged family as the prospects for women in Colombia in general are quite dire.
My partner put it quite succinctly it's called desperation. I love coming on here nearly everyday and I enjoy posting and reading the threads,
I just get sick of all the women bashing generally especially us gringas, not everyone on this forum is male and dating a colombian women, there are some of us gringas who colombian men think are fantastic.

I love coming on here, but the bickering is so infantile sometimes.




hugs Diane x

hugs Diane x

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Dolfi says on Sep 19, 2005, 02:51:

I´s like to make some comments.

When I first posted a profile on amigos.com I recieved at least three times a smuch messages from colombianas than from women of any other country. My girlfriend from Medellín told me that since she was at school she and her friends where dreaminf o f marrying a gringo.

I´ve also been to México and Argentina meeting with women I got to know on the internet and things are definitely different in these countries, ladies there don´t have a special interest in gringos I would say, at least that´s my experíence. So there must also be a special attraction that colombianas find in gringos.

Another thing is that in my country Germany it´s quite diffilcult to find a partner because there is a lack of women; we have about one million less women than men (under 40). You don´t have such a big chance to find a woman if you are over 30; most women I felt attracted to in the last years where married or in a stable relationship with a guy. This is one big reason why Germans increasingly marry foreign women, it doesn´t necessarily have to do with being a loser.

One more point: I was writing and chatting with a 26 year old girl from Bucaramanga for some time (I am 48). She wrote to me and sent me fotos of herself in Bikini, a very attractive Girl. I responded out of curiosity and, of course, out of male vanity. But I very soon realized that we did´nt have much in common. The only thing I could talk about with her where Pop music, movies and about what she would have to do to come to Europe, so I stopped writing to her after some time. All the things that are important to me, Literature, Politics, gardening, classical music, didn´t interest her the least. I wonder how Calipro and his girlfriend spend their time, do thy just stay in bed all day and dance all night?

The girl I´m know together with is 37, 11 years younger than I.

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Lennox says on Sep 19, 2005, 03:12:

Re: Bx You latched onto two sentences of my post to make a snippy reply ignoring all the rest...

"I had tio laugh when I read this. You knwo which group has the highest rate of obesity in the US? Hispanics and Blacks, not European-Americans."

That is a strange response and I'm not sure what your point is. Are you completely ignorant of the fact that most Colombians in cities like Medellin are of European descent? I can assure you there is far less obesity in Medellin than a typical white American suburb.

"Secondly,w hat constitutes acting "masculine"? Oh, you must mean the fact that we will express our opinions and we don't have to marry a rich man to rise in the social ladder anymore. "

Hah so you imply that Colombian women do not express their opinions or that American women are not looking to marry a rich man? LOL!! This is hilarious! I was not referring to money at all my materialistic Gringa. Materialism takes many forms -- it's not just having tons of stuff and being greedy for more. It is the tendency to see life and all of its issues in materialistic and non-spiritual terms.

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pedro (☼Travelguide writer) says on Sep 19, 2005, 03:14:

Bx, I guess I can see where you're coming from. If the roles were reversed, it would probably be annoying for me too.

If we were on a board chatting about Italy and foreign women were always chiming in about what a great man their darling fidanzado was,
I would probably get tired of it. Much more so if they were dissing all Anglo men as worthless etc.

If the forum were about firefighting, it would be distracting to have non-stop "my fireman boyfriend is so hot" comments from the womenfolk.

But sometimes talking about relationships is very relevant to discussing the country and the culture.

Now going back to the first example. If a foreign woman goes to Italy and gets an Italian boyfriend, does she deserve disdain for that choice? Maybe she just likes a particular quality she finds there. She would probably get upset, rightly so, if people suggested she was an unattractive tart who couldn't get a boyfriend anywhere else, no?

The suggestion about putting this stuff in a separate forum is probably a good one. But it might have been better received without the vitriol towards single male posters that came with it.

I, for one, would keep reading the section about relationships if it existed. For me it's an interesting subject.

"this may seem a strange post but it is not...when in colombia men need to be aware that colombia women may try to be seductive and entice a travelling gringo to have sex with them..to be forewarned is to be forearmed..." -- pow wow

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Sonny says on Sep 19, 2005, 05:20:

BxUnika In that there is a lot said about 55 year old men and 18 year old women I guess I missed a lot of post. Someone please show me the post relating to these people and at that age.I read a lot of post talking about this age difference but I wonder how many exist?
Let me say that the age is not so much of a problem. In Russia for example, the women in general prefer a man to be at least 15 to 20 years older then the woman. Mainly do to maturity and stability.
I have a close friend in PA. that is married to a woman 20 years his junior and they are very happy and have been for a long time.
Most of us do not bash women. I for one have never done so. We, many of us play a lot but when we talk about Colombia it is for the love of the people and the country.
You stated that more people from South America should be allowed into the USA.
You sound so bitter and hurt. You sound as though you had something bad happen. Was it an age issue?

Just taking life easy. I worked hard for it and deserve it and now doing it.

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adrimm (Moderator) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Sep 19, 2005, 09:21:

Miamimike "Someone should start a thread and see the responses as to why(priorities) people travel to Colombia."

I have started a thread aimed at couples (without connections to Colombia) who are here at PBH to learn about Colombia for travel purposes, general interest etc. Anyhow I asked them why they are interested in travel to Colombia.


So far there is not one single bite.

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adrimm (Moderator) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Sep 19, 2005, 09:35:

BondJames You nailed it completly.

Not to knock down the masculine ego of some of the guys here, the whole Cinderella factor that bondjames has described is a very significant incentive for Colombian girls. I am not saying it is the case everytime, but it DOES play a role.

Colombian are often very interested in "keeping up with the jones", and tracking who has more "cachet", depending on their level of education, some are often very caught up in the postwar "American dream" image. This image is fuelled by hearing of Colombians in the US who can afford to send $ back to Colombia, stories of amazing successes abroad (which are often exaggerated).

So yes landing a gringo *can be* the ultimate fantasy for middle or lower income Colombian girl.. and in many cases it is. The cachet factor contributes are great deal too.

Bondjames is correct:

"the bubble will sometimes burtst if he cannot offer the same lifestyle.The younger she is,the more likely the downgarde will effect her.. She will eventually find out he is not the "star" amongs men. But an average guy.living an average life and not in the top 10% financial bracket anymore. For some it may have burst the bubble of who she thought she was marrying. Reality sinks in and some women will really be in love and not care. While others will think they were somehow tricked and feel resentful .hense some may call these girls scammers but I do not. It is just a girl who is very impressionable at her age and had her dreams of a "sweet life" turn into dust."

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Crazy4Cali says on Sep 19, 2005, 10:26:

I'm still confused... Why all the angst towards 50-yo men w/ 18 or even 25-yo women? Pick up any copy of People magazine and it's pages are FILLED will such couples. Question to BxUnika, do you also write to them expressing your disgust for all those male Hollywood stars dating women 1/2 their age or younger?

My point is that this type of age difference is not something unique to American/Colombian couples. If a 22-yo woman finds her happiness with a 50-yo man, who are we to say that's bad? After all, since women mature faster then men, that would put them on essentially equal footing.

WRT couples without connections to Colombia travelling there, I'd ask why would they want to go? What can Colombia offer to the casual traveller that they can't find in Mexico, Costa Rica, Panama, or Peru (usually for less money and with less risk or at least less fear)? With Colombia's unfortunately bad reputation (exaggerated or otherwise), why would someone go there if they didn't have a "connection" when there are so many other, reputedly safer, destinations offering the same attractions?

On an average day, from where I live, travelling to Colombia costs anywhere from 2 to 3 times as much as it does to travel to Costa Rica, Panama, or Peru. If I didn't have a connection there, or a perverse desire to go places "I'm not supposed to," I'd probably never have gone to Colombia.

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caslug says on Sep 19, 2005, 11:01:

BX..who got your panties in a ruffle? LOL! seriously, why come down on guys and gals you dont know or will never WANT to meet? I see couple in the US that i think is wacked too, ie, nice gal with bad guys, or bad girls with nice guys, or ugly girl with good looking guys, etc., BUT i dont think that it's the end of the world or they should stop seeing each other. IT'S NOT MY BUSINESS, afterall we're talking about consenting adults here. In COL i certainly dont get into other people's business, so why rant about it here?

BTW, a gringa gets MORE attention in COL than GRINGOS from COL guys. I remember seeing a average looking gringa in a club in cali surrounded by EIGHT COL GUYS(while at most gringos guys get TWO girls NOT EIGHT!) I certainly dont bedgrudge her happiness. So i think it's all good!

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calipro says on Sep 19, 2005, 11:22:

caslug.... Trust me. BX isn{t the type to wear panties. She wears Boxers. LOL !

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Crazy4Cali says on Sep 19, 2005, 11:23:

...and boxing gloves, too, judging from the tone of her posts.

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 11:42:

And a jock strap. Now let me ask you, how'd you like to be HER man? Forget to take out the trash or something and God help you. Think I'll stick with my Colombiana.

I will say this: Granted we have a relatively small sample set, but of the Colombianas that were actually RAISED in Colombia like Desi, Adrimm, SilviaT, look how they differ in tone and expression from those who were raised elsewhere, like Bx and Silvie, the young Tazmanian Devil herself?

THAT'S one of the most telling differences I see. Work is hard enough, I'm not trying to come home and spar with a malcontent, argumentative woman who still--by the way--won't answer logical questions.

Logical question like: How is it your business? and Why don't you start a thread talking about something that interests you? or even Why do you open the threads if you don't like the title?

No, she won't answer those questions because they're too logical. As Chris Rock said, we men will never reach the end of this argument because we have a need to make sense. Women are in it for distance and irritation. So she'll come back with something attacking, still won't respond to logical questions, and this thread will continue long after I board my plane BACK to Colombia to see my girl. Have fun while you're at it, and may God help your man.

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kernow62 says on Sep 19, 2005, 11:51:

Uh Desi is not Colombian, and Adrimm was raised in Canada to the best of my knowledge.

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 11:54:

Desi is Colombian, she just lives in Stockholm. Adrimm of course lives in Canada now, but from what I understand she was born there.

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WestCoastGirl says on Sep 19, 2005, 12:33:

BxUnica I wanted to comment that I agree with your point of view. I have been reading the posts here for quite some time but I was compelled to write after reading the long-drawn out bickering. I think you've hit a nerve!

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Desideria (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Sep 19, 2005, 12:37:

cam, kernow is right about both me and adrimm. I was born in Finland and live in Stockholm. I have no Colombian blood whatsoever. Adrimm was born in Canada, Colombian mother and Canadian father.
Cheers,
Desi

A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

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adrimm (Moderator) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Sep 19, 2005, 12:47:

There you go I'm starting to feel like an oldtimer on PBH, the whipper-snapper people don't even know me.

;)

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 12:51:

I did some checking and acknowledged the error to him in a PM. The hope was that the thread would fall lower and lower, maybe off the first page, and no one would see the error. But the point was that you don't have to be so combative to make a point. Bx has insulted some people who seem to be nice, well intentioned people. Also, severl thirty-somethings wrote in when she asked "Where are they?" and she never even acknowledged that.

She also never acknowledged the obvious fact that the other halves of these relationships, the Colombianas, often don't have a strong enough command of English to defend themselves from being called ignorant visa chasers (given that these debates are in English), and even if they did, going to a cafe to write into PBH is not as convenient as it is for some of us.

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utopiacowboy says on Sep 19, 2005, 12:58:

You're right. My wife is never going to put her 2 centavos in because she thinks the whole site is nonsense.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 13:01:

If Bx makes the same allegations in the Solo En Espanol section, so my girlfriend can understand it when she gets here on Sep 29, we're gonna see an old fashioned catfight. And the same could probably be said for many of the gringos' girlfriends. What cowardice to beat up on these girls when they're not even in a position to defend themselves. As you can see, the gringos speaking up for them is doing no good.

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kat1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) (☼Travelguide writer) says on Sep 19, 2005, 13:09:

everybody is being stereotype in this website, Colombianas chasing Gringos,Gringos fat and bald, Gringas cold and fat blah blah. this never going to change, I agree with greenday just skip the post and move to the next one.

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utopiacowboy says on Sep 19, 2005, 13:13:

Check out the DVD called "Crash" about what happens with people and their stereotypes about one another.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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paisa29 says on Sep 19, 2005, 13:21:

Cam0940... "the Colombianas, often don't have a strong enough command of English to defend themselves"

I think this is not fair there some Colombian women in this forum who have an excellent knowledge of the english language, my english is not perfect but I always try to express myself if I don`t like something I read here or in the last case I write in spanish, but at least I am making an effort.

"Fill the earth with the light and warmth of hospitality" Conrad Hilton

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 13:32:

And that's great Paisa29. If something I said made it sound personal to you, then I apologize.

I think you will find that many of the gringos' girlfriends who are being attacked, even if they speak some English, it's not enough to spar with Bx.

If you have a gringo boyfriend, and you are with him because you love him, not because he's your "Sugar Daddy", then by all means, speak up.

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 13:47:

En caso de que hemos perdido algo traduciendo al Ingles Paisa29, lo que dije es que hay bastante Colombianas que salen con gringos. Bx las acuso de enganar a los gringos, dijo que solamente salen con los gringos para sacarles dinero, y para que los gringos las mantengan. Escuchando a Bx, uno creeria que la mayoria de los gringos tienen a lo menos 50 anos, son bien gordos y feos, y que salen con jovencitas en Colombia porque no pueden encontrar a mujeres en sus propios paises. Claro que todavia estamos esperando la evidencia que apoya su teoria. A parte de eso, ningunas de estas relaciones son basadas en el amor verdadero.

Desafortunadamente, como muchas de las novias no hablen el ingles, ni tienen un computador en casa en primer lugar, no pueden defenderse en contra de esas acusaciones. Te parece justo?

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helen says on Sep 19, 2005, 14:22:

wow, this is still a hot topic. i just went through all bx comments in this post and i'm baffled as to where you see her attacking attacking wives and girlfriends....this seems to have deteriorated into an attack on her, anyway just an observation

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Crazy4Cali says on Sep 19, 2005, 15:29:

You see what you're looking for... starting with her original post:

"Get real. 7-8 out of 10 posts on here are about some dumb gringo and his almost adolescent fiancee or about some gringo getting played by his "girlfriend" or "fiancee" or about how to meet (for sex, of course) a "beautiful, sweet colombiana with traditional values"."

Setting the tone for an open and healthy discussion...not! After skipping a bunch of "only the men are guilty of...." comments, She later asserts:

"There is no way you can sit there with a strait[sic] face and deny that the ONLY thing an 18yr old girl and a 50 yr old man have in common is Sex and money, or she is looking for a "Daddy""

Clearly implying that no 18-yo Colombiana can know what she wants. Gosh, I'd have thought you'd give other members of your gender the benefit of the doubt, but I guess that's reserved only for first-world women. which is later substantiated when she says:

The answer is simple, 95% of the girls in America, Canada, England ect are much better off financially and don;t need a 50 year old guy and his money. Where in Colombia, due to economics, these 18 yr olds get a much better life financially with an older, financially secure gringo. Again, if I am wrong, please explain why you don;t see these same Colombian girls at the mall with 50 year old Colombian men of little means. These are relationships driven by money, which is FINE, but again, call it what it is, "A financial arrangement"."

implying that no first-world woman would ever do that. Ignoring, of course, how this DOES happen quite often in first world as any issue of people magazine (or the wedding announcement pages Salt Lake City's newspaper) would prove. After many contrary opinions, she then continues to assert the foolishness of those poor, ignorant Colombianas with this stroke of wit:

"Where are the young, bachelor 20 to early 30s- something who are dating/marrying colombianas? Why aren't they here? I think all of you can read between the lines and come to your own conclusion. I know there are American men who date/marry Colombian women without power, money, sex, and low self-esteem coming into play. WHY aren't they here to share?"

And what conclusions are there to draw? That young couples have better things to do than post their happiness on some random web-site? I'd agree with that. And besides, I'm one of those who didn't pick a colombiana based on money, or power or to find a partner younger than my children. I guess my posts don't count, yet I'm not the only one that falls into that category so apparently BxUnika's research is a bit shoddy (to the extent it exists at all). But, then she had to get not only personal but quite racist saying:

"I had tio[sic] laugh when I read this. You knwo[sic] which group has the highest rate of obesity in the US? Hispanics and Blacks, not European-Americans."

Boy, you can feel the love in that statement. Since my fiance is hispanic, why should I not be offended by this racist defamation? Anyway, you see what you want to see, as a Journalist, Helen, you should know all about that phenomena. The men are offended by the resoundingly anti-male tone BxUnika has taken. Granted her rage is apparently targeted at only those fat, balding, 50yo men looking for 18yo girlfriends/slaves/love-toys, so I'm clearly not the target of her attack being none of those. Nevertheless, she is spewing instead of speaking and getting a lot of people wet with her bile in the process. Her rants are, in character, no better than those she condemns. The women, the brave few who have responded, agree with her position becuase they, too, seem to be tired of the "where can I find a good hooker?" posts so they don't see anything outside of that theme (or don't care to comment beyond that). Ironically, many of the men also agree with that post however BxUnika has taken such a compative tone with everyone of the male sex that that message will never be heard. I actually agree with her complaint, but I could never be on her side.

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helen says on Sep 19, 2005, 15:48:

ok, yes, some of the language is somewhat aggressive, but even the comments you point out are not attacking the women personally. seriously. there was not in my view personal statements against you or your girlfriends, she even said in there - i think - that it wasn´t agaisnt the the bulk of the posters. it was more the constant use of this post to look for women, which is what irritates me too. that's all. i have no problem with guys coming to colombia or going anywhere else in the world to meet women, just don´t subject us all to the gory details. yes, we can all just ignore them, but we don´t. it's like slowing down to look at a car wreck, we secretly are intrigued with being grossed out. anyway, i just feel that all the posts deteriorate into mud slinging and unpleasantness. someone said yesterday i seem young by the way i write, well i am 36 soon, and if that's young great, but i would never sink to all the nastiness that seems in my view to be incredibly immature....anyway, that's my opinion for what it is worth.

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helen says on Sep 19, 2005, 15:50:

....oooh, one more thing. i also find it condesending to repeatedly bring up that women are thinking about it in first world and third world terms. i for one am not.....

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calipro says on Sep 19, 2005, 16:13:

cam0940 I can believe you mistook Dezi for a colombiana. LOL!!!

Everything and I mean everything is about as uncolombiana as a person can get. Dezi = anti-colombiana !!!!

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Crazy4Cali says on Sep 19, 2005, 16:14:

Lies, damned lies, and statistics I think if someone actually sat down and counted the threads, I'd bet the "where can I find a good woman in Colombia" threads (those with a title along those lines) would be in the distinct minority. I'd put money on them being less than 10% of the topics.

If you also included the threads that devolve into the "I don't like gringas, and here are the reasons why" threads as well as those that devolve into "I think colombianas are hot/desirable and here are the reasons why." You might make it up to 20% (if you were being generous).

Neither of which is anywhere close to the 70 or 80% asserted by BxUnika. While I don't mind skimming a controversial topic when I don't have much else to do, I, personally don't have the time (nor the inclination) to count thread topics.

I've seen this "quest for topic purity" on other sites (where I actually DID count the deviant topics) and the count was less than 5%, however, those 5% generated 80% of the interest from about 4 individual posters.

My guess is that those numbers would apply here as well.

Bottom-line: This board is not here to make BxUnika, or any other individual happy (a daunting task on a good day, I'd imagine). And the most practical way to raise the overall level of postings is for each poster to post politely as the rules state.

BxUnika's post against bad posts is, in itself a bad post (in that she's thrown personal attacks or at least snipes at just about every racial, and ethnic group) I see her as much a part of the problem as those she's condemning. For that matter, I'm as much a part of the problem by continuing to feed the trolls.

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 16:19:

That's it, I'm using my Mulligan.

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caslug says on Sep 19, 2005, 17:19:

Helen as a journalist, dont you do fact check? BX, got things off on the wrong foot with this comment..

"It seems a lot of you know you can't post the crap that you'd like to here, so you go over there to spew your garbage. You guys know who you are. "

WRONG, while the names maybe the same, it's not the same posters. If you spent anytime reading it, it's seem to be posted by the same person.

Also, IF she's visited COL then she will KNOW that there's NOT tons of 50 yr gringos with 18 yr COL. You live in COL, you've been to Unicentro centro comercial on a sunday afternoon. DO you see lots of 50 yr gringos with 18yr hotties? I think not! BUT what you WILL see is a few 50 yr COL guys with 18 yr hotties.

Is she defending young COL chicas or gringas? Neither of which need her help. Gringas are very happy in there situation, in US they hold all the cards, get all the attention. When they go to COL(or overseas) they get all the attention too. So what do they need defending from, they got it made! As for young COL chicas, they got it made too, if they hot, they got a BF, most likely COL guy or for a few foreign guys. They get attention, gifts, get to go out partying, etc., what's the downside?

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CaryGrant says on Sep 19, 2005, 17:52:

Women complain that all men want to talk about is where and how to meet women, and seek to ban such unevolved behaviour. Then, the women will complain that they can't find a good man, or that they *really* like some guy - why won't he make a move? :-)

Massive generalization coming:
Women argue emotionally; men argue rationally. Both approaches are required to understand the truth of a situation. Because of the nature of a forum, emotions can be expressed but not addressed well by other posters, so male attempts to reason with the women are wasted, just as are female attempts to express an emotional argument. It's like a cat trying to talk to a dog.

Some women express emotions rather violently, with unsupportable generalizations and personal attacks, like Bx or my first wife. Unless a man never tires of battling with his woman, he smiles and backs away from women like Bx. Some men express their opinions in an overbearing, overly logical way that takes little account of humanity, or they attempt to intimidate using their larger physical size. Again, why discuss even the weather with such people?

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helen says on Sep 19, 2005, 18:13:

are we still at this bashing stuff? let's close this thread and move on. we all have learnt, i hope, something from it. i have. i am not groaning unecessarily and bitching about other people's opinions or lives, simply expressing a wish that we can discuss something more fulfilling. now, practice what you all preach. if you don´t like BX´s opinions don't focus on them. she is entitled to them, as am i and as you all are entitled to yours. i will try and ignore what i don't like from the threads from now on. now you all do the same. we are heading to 200 posts on this one thread and we have not moved on at all. circles and circles in the words of the great tori amos. there were very few people on this thread that listened to the original point, discussed it sensibly and established some sort of common ground. i know there is common gound. i have read many of the threads prior to this and know that so many fundamentally agree with with what she has to say, whether or not you like her tone. so stop bashing and let's move on.....i'm sure that was her intention in the first place. i hope as a woman that i am not sexist, so let's hope the guys contributing aren't too.....let's move on!

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helen says on Sep 19, 2005, 18:27:

if that was meant as a jibe, bugger off! hehehe. if not, i don't want to talk about recipes, unless you have something fabulous. i guess we could get controversial on that though. let's talk about men versus women in the kitchen. women in the kitchen at home, men in the kitchen in restaurants...

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helen says on Sep 19, 2005, 18:52:

i didn't perceive it as such, hence the hehehehe that followed the comment. gringas in colombian kitchens? not sure what gringas cook but not keen on sampling that delicacy. the US, as britain, is not know for its culinary excellence.....

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helen says on Sep 19, 2005, 18:53:

...niether for that matter is colombia.

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calipro says on Sep 19, 2005, 20:20:

Bx is right about one thing..... This board is going to hell!

Now let's start talking about important stuff like where the hottest colombianas hang out and how we can meet them. hehehe !!!

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:10:

at Lennox "That is a strange response and I'm not sure what your point is."

It was a rebutal to the statement that men go for Colombian women because most "gringas" here are overweight. I sad that Latinos and Blacks had a higher rate of obesity than White "gringas" do, who they were calling overweight to begin with. If you don't understand the response, then that's your problem.

"Are you completely ignorant of the fact that most Colombians in cities like Medellin are of European descent?"

Yeah, but the US Census differentiates between European-American (as in directly descended from Europe) as opposed to Hispanics, which are over any race but are not considered European-Americans because they came via Latin America from Europe.

"Hah so you imply that Colombian women do not express their opinions or that American women are not looking to marry a rich man? LOL!! This is hilarious! I was not referring to money at all my materialistic Gringa. Materialism takes many forms -- it's not just having tons of stuff and being greedy for more. It is the tendency to see life and all of its issues in materialistic and non-spiritual terms."

Aapprently ytour reading comprehension leaves much to be desires. Suit yourself.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:10:

at Lennox "That is a strange response and I'm not sure what your point is."

It was a rebutal to the statement that men go for Colombian women because most "gringas" here are overweight. I sad that Latinos and Blacks had a higher rate of obesity than White "gringas" do, who they were calling overweight to begin with. If you don't understand the response, then that's your problem.

"Are you completely ignorant of the fact that most Colombians in cities like Medellin are of European descent?"

Yeah, but the US Census differentiates between European-American (as in directly descended from Europe) as opposed to Hispanics, which are over any race but are not considered European-Americans because they came via Latin America from Europe.

"Hah so you imply that Colombian women do not express their opinions or that American women are not looking to marry a rich man? LOL!! This is hilarious! I was not referring to money at all my materialistic Gringa. Materialism takes many forms -- it's not just having tons of stuff and being greedy for more. It is the tendency to see life and all of its issues in materialistic and non-spiritual terms."

Aapprently ytour reading comprehension leaves much to be desired. Suit yourself.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:15:

at Sonny "Most of us do not bash women. I for one have never done so. We, many of us play a lot but when we talk about Colombia it is for the love of the people and the country.
You stated that more people from South America should be allowed into the USA.
You sound so bitter and hurt. You sound as though you had something bad happen. Was it an age issue?"

I am dating a 28 year old Colombian man (we both live in NYC). I don't date guys too much older than I am because I don't need money or security. I just find something fundamentally wrong with a man who feels the need to date girls (I don't think an 18 year old is a woman) young enough to be his daughter. If it happens by chance, maybe, but I don't see how going to a foreign country in search of one or going to a Colombian dating site in search of one is "coincedence".

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:21:

Still Confused? "Why all the angst towards 50-yo men w/ 18 or even 25-yo women? Pick up any copy of People magazine and it's pages are FILLED will such couples."

Yeah, and since when is Hollywood normal? If you seriously believe Hollywood is a good example to use to model your life after, I can't help you there. Most of that crowd is shallow and relationships there last as long as a snowstorm. Your argument is quie moot

"My point is that this type of age difference is not something unique to American/Colombian couples. If a 22-yo woman finds her happiness with a 50-yo man, who are we to say that's bad? After all, since women mature faster then men, that would put them on essentially equal footing."

But how many real relationships are featured on here? Most sound like hey are all abut sex, money, looks, and the green card.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:21:

Still Confused? "Why all the angst towards 50-yo men w/ 18 or even 25-yo women? Pick up any copy of People magazine and it's pages are FILLED will such couples."

Yeah, and since when is Hollywood normal? If you seriously believe Hollywood is a good example to use to model your life after, I can't help you there. Most of that crowd is shallow and relationships there last as long as a snowstorm. Your argument is quie moot

"My point is that this type of age difference is not something unique to American/Colombian couples. If a 22-yo woman finds her happiness with a 50-yo man, who are we to say that's bad? After all, since women mature faster then men, that would put them on essentially equal footing."

But how many real relationships are featured on here? Most sound like hey are all abut sex, money, looks, and the green card.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:25:

Advice "seriously, why come down on guys and gals you dont know or will never WANT to meet? I see couple in the US that i think is wacked too, ie, nice gal with bad guys, or bad girls with nice guys, or ugly girl with good looking guys, etc., BUT i dont think that it's the end of the world or they should stop seeing each other. IT'S NOT MY BUSINESS, afterall we're talking about consenting adults here. In COL i certainly dont get into other people's business, so why rant about it here?"

Here's a bit of advce that was once ffered to Jennifer Lopez after she became tired of being questioned about her bad choices in relationships:

As long as you discuss them in pubic settings and make your private life public, you can no longer complain and act like a victim, that people are picking on you.

Now, I don't even HAVE to ask about thes relationships because these people VOLUNTEER their personal information. If they don't want to hear it, they should keep it to themselves.

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:26:

You are just so unfair, my God!!!!

How about this? Since it's already ugly, why don't you name names? Give examples so we at least know specifically who you're talking about? Who knows? Maybe you're right. Maybe your list will add up to 50%-75% of the gringo posters.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:31:

at Cam "And a jock strap. Now let me ask you, how'd you like to be HER man? Forget to take out the trash or something and God help you. Think I'll stick with my Colombiana."

My COLOMBANO love me just fine. Hey, I don't have to go across continents to find someone to put up with me. That doesn't speak t well of you.

"I will say this: Granted we have a relatively small sample set, but of the Colombianas that were actually RAISED in Colombia like Desi, Adrimm, SilviaT, look how they differ in tone and expression from those who were raised elsewhere, like Bx and Silvie, the young Tazmanian Devil herself?"

Funny, because almost all of those named are not Colombian, bt rather Euro or Canadian or American.

"THAT'S one of the most telling differences I see. Work is hard enough, I'm not trying to come home and spar with a malcontent, argumentative woman who still--by the way--won't answer logical questions."

Well, when you start acting logical, then I'll answer the questions.

"Logical question like: How is it your business? and Why don't you start a thread talking about something that interests you? or even Why do you open the threads if you don't like the title?"

Like I said before, if you don't want flack, keep your bedroom life to yourself. It seems you have something to prove. Stop playing victim.

"No, she won't answer those questions because they're too logical. As Chris Rock said, we men will never reach the end of this argument because we have a need to make sense. Women are in it for distance and irritation. So she'll come back with something attacking, still won't respond to logical questions, and this thread will continue long after I board my plane BACK to Colombia to see my girl. Have fun while you're at it, and may God help your man."

HAHAHA. No wonder no American woman wants you. You're a miserable, sexist pig. I guess maybe if I got money and a green card out of the deal, I could pretend to kiss your ass for a few months too.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:34:

Coward? "If Bx makes the same allegations in the Solo En Espanol section, so my girlfriend can understand it when she gets here on Sep 29, we're gonna see an old fashioned catfight. And the same could probably be said for many of the gringos' girlfriends. What cowardice to beat up on these girls when they're not even in a position to defend themselves. As you can see, the gringos speaking up for them is doing no good."

No, the coward is you. I think the colombianas are pretty smart and will be having the last laugh when they leave you high and dry to lick your wounds. You must really think pretty low of these women if you think you need to defend them. Your actions speak for themselves. Maybe after all is sad and done you will learn the lesson of your life when "your" colombiana marries, cmes here, and leaves you for a real man.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:43:

Crazy4Cali Might Want to Read What He Wrote Ok, you just lost all crediblity. You said:

"Clearly implying that no 18-yo Colombiana can know what she wants. Gosh, I'd have thought
you'd give other members of your gender the benefit of the doubt, but I guess that's reserved
only for first-world women. which is later substantiated when she says:


The answer is simple, 95% of the girls in America, Canada, England ect are much better
off financially and don;t need a 50 year old guy and his money. Where in Colombia, due to economics, these 18 yr olds get a much better life financially with an older, financially secure gringo. Again, if I am wrong, please explain why you don;t see these
same Colombian girls at the mall with 50 year old Colombian men of little means. These are relationships driven by money, which is FINE, but again, call it what it is, "A financial arrangement"."

implying that no first-world woman would ever do that. Ignoring, of course, how this DOES happen quite often in first world as any issue of people magazine (or the wedding announcement pages Salt Lake City's newspaper) would prove."


Well, I NEVER said that, BAQ did! It's pretty hard to create an argument when you can't even quote the right person. You are obviously so heated that you can't even follow the conversation.

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BxUnika says on Sep 19, 2005, 22:46:

at Caslug "Also, IF she's visited COL then she will KNOW that there's NOT tons of 50 yr gringos with 18 yr COL. You live in COL, you've been to Unicentro centro comercial on a sunday afternoon. DO you see lots of 50 yr gringos with 18yr hotties? I think not! BUT what you WILL see is a few 50 yr COL guys with 18 yr hotties."

Well, why don't you see this almost EVER n the US? I live in NYC and am in rich as el as very poor neghbrhoods everyday and very rarely see this.

"Is she defending young COL chicas or gringas? Neither of which need her help. Gringas are very happy in there situation, in US they hold all the cards, get all the attention. When they go to COL(or overseas) they get all the attention too. So what do they need defending from, they got it made! As for young COL chicas, they got it made too, if they hot, they got a BF, most likely COL guy or for a few foreign guys. They get attention, gifts, get to go out partying, etc., what's the downside?"

I'm not defending or insulting Colombian OR American females. I stand alone and that'd not my job as they can do that very well themselves.

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cam0940 says on Sep 19, 2005, 23:23:

Come on if you want, GIL. I'm outta here Thursday morning at 8:00AM.

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Rubiazo says on Sep 19, 2005, 23:52:

What BxUnika can get out of discussing sex on the board.
Personally I think she needs a couple pointers. Maybe she's doing it all wrong and just not getting what she should be getting out of it. It comes through in her attitude.

It seems pretty obvious to me that BxUnika has a severe chip on her shoulder and a huge case of Latina-envy. Funny thing, I know lots of broke-ass girls down here who are happy and wouldn't trade places with her for all the money in the world.

Living in NYC means you are rich on paper but still live in a rat infested dump and spend 75% of your cash or more just on rent for that privlege. The one thing it had going for it was great nightlife but now that's long gone!

Plenty of girls in NYC will either hook up with some rich older guy or some thug just so they can ride in a new SUV and/or get high for free. And its not like any of those 18 year old Colombianas are going to STARVE to death if they don't find a rich gringo either.

I love how Unika asserts so strongly that an 18 year old is not capable of making her own decisions when she's only 4 years away from it. I bet she was saying the same thing about 15 year olds when she was 18!!!

I'm still waiting for any of you mental midgets who agree with her to PROVIDE ANYTHING OF SUBSTANCE FOR THE FORUM. Funny how all the retards who are defending her have little or no posting history. Part of the solution of part of the problem?? I wonder......

Lastly, if I were a female I wouldn't want to have anything to do with American or Canadian men either. But I would always be open to making an exception for the right INDIVIDUAL. But I think that in general the US and Canada are shitty places for relationships AND families for many reasons, whether you are male OR female.

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Lennox says on Sep 20, 2005, 01:00:

Steaks in Colombia I was a little disappointed by the steaks in Colombia to be honest, especially after just having been to Argentina and being accustomed to USDA steak at Ruth Chris and other good restaurants. I did enjoy some great meals in Colombia, just not any great steaks. Maybe I did not go to the right places in Medellin?

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Rubiazo says on Sep 20, 2005, 01:12:

I ate at Ruth Chris once big huge fucking waste of money. I'm surprised you'd even put it in the same sentence with Argentina.
The beef here is of excellent quality, people are just very ignorant about how to prepare it. And like at Ruth Chris, you can't get a goddamn steak with the bone in, which means you miss a lot of the flavor.

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Lennox says on Sep 20, 2005, 01:27:

heh everyone hast their own taste I guess I only like to order Filet mignon type of steak no bones for me, but I'm not a huge steak affficianado as you appear to be. You are right that Argentina steak at places such as Cabaña Las Lilas is another level entirely.

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Lennox says on Sep 20, 2005, 02:38:

BxUnika profile She has hundreds of racist posts and arguments on another board. Seems all she did was get into fights about blacks and hispanics daily. I suppose being from a family of heroin addicts and junkies in a poor black neighborhood left her with some severe emotional issues that we have the pleasure of facing here on this board now.

This I guess is how she met her boyfriend:

http://myprofile.collegeclub.com/messageboards/board.jsp?communityid=282357

I'm an 18/f from the Bronx of Scandinavian/Irish/Polish descent looking for a handsome South American guy (especially Colombians and Venezulans). I love Latin American culture and think South American guys are beautiful. If you are 18-24 years old with a photo, please e-mail me or post on this board.

She has hundreds of racist posts and arguments on another board. Seems all she did was get into fights about blacks and hispanics daily. I suppose being from a family of heroin addicts and junkies in a poor black neighborhood left her with some severe emotional issues that we have the pleasure of facing here on this board now.

This I guess is how she met her boyfriend:

http://myprofile.collegeclub.com/messageboards/board.jsp?communityid=282357

I'm an 18/f from the Bronx of Scandinavian/Irish/Polish descent looking for a handsome South American guy (especially Colombians and Venezulans). I love Latin American culture and think South American guys are beautiful. If you are 18-24 years old with a photo, please e-mail me or post on this board.

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Lennox says on Sep 20, 2005, 02:59:

Sorry for the double post above.

BxUnika is really an amusing character. Here is one of her funnier posts:

" suggest you come to where I live in the Bronx and leave here for a few months and see how it feels to be one of two Whites in your class at school the only White in the subway car, the only White person in a Black & Puerto Rican neighborhood...."

Sounds like being a poor white person isn't much fun. Might explain why her only posts on this board before this thread were about how to find the cheapest plane tickets to get out of there.

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Rubiazo says on Sep 20, 2005, 03:40:

The truth finally comes out I have no sympathy for someone who had to grow up white in the Bronx. At least she didn't ever have to deal with the assholes at US immigration. Besides, being white in the Bronx has its advantages, especially as far as dealing with the police, like Elmo just pointed out.

Issues: Abortion (pro-choice), Civil Rights, Gay-Bi Rights, Pre-marital Sex (not OK), School Prayer (against), Women's Rights

That's rich, she's pro-choice but believes that sex before marriage is not OK. I'd love to hear the logic behind that one.

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quindioman says on Sep 20, 2005, 03:43:

not sure how bxunika will explain that one but maybe the pro choice is for rape cases...who knows?

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kernow62 says on Sep 20, 2005, 04:23:

Lennox, posting what a person may have posted on another forum is in extremely bad taste. As we have all seen with another "Colombia" forum it is very easy to spoof one's ID and post all sorts of nonsensical garbage.

It is a bit like posting on the forum about what somebody sent you in a PM or a personal E-mail. Some things are not meant for the forum.

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helen says on Sep 20, 2005, 04:42:

´´I'm still waiting for any of you mental midgets who agree with her to PROVIDE ANYTHING OF SUBSTANCE FOR THE FORUM. Funny how all the retards who are defending her have little or no posting history. Part of the solution of part of the problem?? I wonder......´´


good grief! mental midget? retard? you have such a lovely way to describe the women on this forum. i assume you are talking about women - both colombian and non - you charming man you.....and frankly, why would anyone with a brain even the tiniest bit larger than yours post anything here to have it ripped apart by you. And now we have people cutting and pasting from other sites! hell. this is totaly unpleasant. i haven't opened a thread before and have just stared posting. it think i will stop. it's not worth it.

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