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Slammed in the Face

I know a guy, 53 years old, who was a retired doctor and he met a 24 year-old Barranquillera online. He went down to Colombia, got a fiancee visa, took her to the states, and got married to her.

Now this guy lived in Goat's Ass, North Carolina in what was, to be fair, a very nice double-wide, as far as double-wides go. There was absolutely nothing around except rednecks, goats, and cows. The drive to the nearest real town was about 20 minutes, and that wasn't much to speak of.

So, you've got this poor Barranquillera taken completely out of her environment and dropped into redneck central, with nobody around who could speak Spanish other than her husband and nothing to do all day but watch TV and put up with her husband's increasingly worse attitude. (He told me this story himself). Anyway, they had some fights, and the fights got worse and worse, and he smacked her around a little. Bad, bad move.

The man goes to sleep one night, and our heroine grabs up the telephone set and smashes him in the face. She knocks him out hard. Then she takes $12,000 in cash from him, takes his car, drives to the airport, and head back to Barranquilla.

He calls and tries to work things out with her. Tells her he's getting on the next flight and coming back. Her response was that if he came back to Barranquilla, her cousins would kill him.

The lesson is: There is a line. Do not cross it.

By DiegoDelNorte on Nov 11, 2004, 12:32 in Friendly Talkzone.

mad_lion says on Nov 11, 2004, 13:14:

TRUE......... True.....true.

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Munecabella says on Nov 11, 2004, 14:06:

Wow! I think that puts it all in perspective for a lot of people.

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Munecabella says on Nov 11, 2004, 14:44:

Yea... getting smacked around is NOT my type of lifestyle.

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Lionheart says on Nov 11, 2004, 17:55:

One of the reasons I am moving At one time several years back I was considering to find a Latina and bring her back to the USA. That was before the economical downhill ride here. I did a lot of research and found out that many Latinas are very unhappy in the USA, being ripped out of their families and having no easy way to visit them often. Plus the US way of life was too strange for them to adapt or be accepted in general. Several marriages I saw went bad that way, without getting abusive. But I can see it happen easily in the heat of the moment.

That is when I made my decision to move to Latin America instead. Due to my job I have to leave the USA and either return to Europe, where I lived 30 years, or move on to a new culture, Asia or Latin America. I chose Latin America for many reasons, and last not least Colombia. If/when I find the woman to share my life in Colombia, she will be not too far from friends and family and remain in her known environment. I can adjust and learn, and I have no family close to me ... so why not?

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Atrevido says on Nov 11, 2004, 18:22:

So why did he have $12,000 in his house where she could find it if they were having spats? Also if he was a doctor why didn't he just inject her with stuff everytime he got mad instead of slapping her around and was that phone she bashed him with a corded set or cordless? I think that's important to the story.

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DiegoDelNorte says on Nov 11, 2004, 18:33:

Money in the house He had the $12,000 in the safe. I guess she knew the combo and he didn't expect her to just up and leave.

What kind of doctors do you know who keep syringes full of drugs around for sedating their wives whenever they have disagreements?

The phone was one of those heavy square pushbutton desk phones like you used to find in a lot of offices. You could kill someone with it.

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elmodefoque says on Nov 11, 2004, 18:48:

diego, that is the funniest shit i heard, i fully beleive it because barranquilleras are no joke, they are a bit like puerto ricans. tomorrow i'll post a pic of my daughter, she's of barranquilla blood and one very tough bitch, she scares me sometimes.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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Tinto (Moderator) says on Nov 11, 2004, 18:50:

Haha... The guy made enough to retire at age 53, keeps $12,000 in cash at home, but lives in a housetrailer? Oh well, people and their relationship with money is a subject of much study.

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Atrevido says on Nov 11, 2004, 19:08:

There are a lot of goats in Barranquilla. I can't imagine why she didn't feel more at home in Goat's Ass.

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DiegoDelNorte says on Nov 11, 2004, 22:07:

Gringo Goats Can't Dance "There are a lot of goats in Barranquilla. I can't imagine why she didn't feel more at home in Goat's Ass."

Maybe it was that the goats couldn't salsa. They were more like "Freebird" goats.

"The guy made enough to retire at age 53, keeps $12,000 in cash at home, but lives in a housetrailer?"

Well, he had the lot right across the street from his practice, and he was a single guy, so he just put the doublewide on the lot for quick construction, and started improving it. I kid you not, it is the ony doublewide I have ever seen with Italian marble floors throughout.

There's a comedian named James Gregory who talks about his uncle who says: "When I get rich, I'm gonna get me a two-story trailer."

"They don't make two-story trailers, uncle."

"Well they outter. For thems that's got MONEY!"

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elmodefoque says on Nov 12, 2004, 09:04:

Man, I could just imagine that barranquillera back home telling her story:
.”nojodaaa, le sampe un cipote jopo de telefono a ese hijueputa gringo en el puro coco, casi mato a ese malpario, le quite 12 mil barras, y le dije que si venia a barranquilla a joderme mi primo lo va a coronar, paque no joda mas.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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DiegoDelNorte says on Nov 12, 2004, 09:46:

Y Mejor Que La Crea! A mi no me gustaria ser ese puto en Barranquilla... espero que el la crea y lo se quede en Goat's Ass. El no merece el amor de una Barranquillera.

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Munecabella says on Nov 12, 2004, 10:22:

ahhhhhh Elmo... LOL! You never let me down. That was toooooo funny. I bet that's exactly how she told it. LOL!!!!

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isaactraveler says on Nov 12, 2004, 13:41:

what the hell is a retired doctor doing in a doublewide?

how about:
male nurse (terminated for drinking)
$500 (not $12k)
kicked in the balls, not hit in the face
where do you put a safe, in a double wide? under the kitchen sink?

and I STILL think that elmo should shoot his balls off

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DiegoDelNorte says on Nov 13, 2004, 04:42:

Actually... Doctor retired early in his career at "request" from medical licensing board. Too many unusual prescriptions.

Yes, it was $12K.

Yes, he was hit in the face.

You put a safe in a double wide the same place you put it in a regular house. Wherever you want.

Anyway, this is my last post providing any kind of justification of the story. It is what it is.

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isaactraveler says on Nov 13, 2004, 05:43:

hey diego i was just kidding with ya dont take offense, it really was a funny story and i was having fun with you.

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DiegoDelNorte says on Nov 13, 2004, 10:26:

Lighten Up, Diego Once again, I need to lighten up.

Thanks.

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ARMacleod says on Dec 12, 2004, 05:17:

Vive la (age)difference? Hi all.
I am a relative newcomer to this site. I met a fantastic girl August 03. We have just decided to go all out on everything. I am bringing her back to England where we will get married. Back to colombia and another wedding, This time in a catholic church. I lived with her in Colombia for two weeks. Three months later she lived with me for six months (in England) September I go to Colombia and will not return to England. We have spent a lot of time discussing our plans by 'E' mail. 790 A4 Pages in all. I am 64 and she is 54, that has been my main worry. Does anyone know of any realtionship that has lasted in love when a 20 something (or younger) marries an aged octogenarian?

Let me fill in the spaces between the lines.

He is after something to boost his flagging libido

She knows she will not have to put up with his drooling for long.

Am I correct or am I correct?

Logic would suggest that the male should actively seek out a female about 11 years his senior and he could spend his money on enlargement and Viagra?

Me I have even changed my name by deed poll. (political decision)

Am I just being too much of a realist?

Me? I am going to be as happy as the proverbial 'pig in shit'.

Be happy

The brain is like a parachute, it only functions correctly when it is open. Pax vobiscum.

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utopiacowboy says on Dec 12, 2004, 07:53:

You're worried because you're 64 and she's 54? I am not following you.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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lpdiver says on Dec 15, 2004, 01:26:

LMAO A double wide with a safe?

"cook some rice!"

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ReinaDeLa Baile says on Dec 15, 2004, 13:12:

I LOVE IT! at Tell us more, tell us more. tee hee hee HILLLLLLLARIOUS!

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Lionheart says on Dec 15, 2004, 13:39:

Double Wides in South Carolina When I was working in SC on a contract I had friends living in DWs ... even if the safe was just sitting under the DW I would not have crawled under there to get it. Chances are very high that you will meet a local alligator ... they are very good watch dogs.

How do you catch a alligator running through your back yard?

Toss a garden hose at it, watch it go into the death-roll, when it can't move anymore pull your .45 and shoot its brains out. BBQ'ed gatortail is delicious!

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miamimike says on Dec 15, 2004, 21:56:

I wouldn't worry !! At your age and hers--she will be pretty stable. At 54--she is not likely to fly the coop. Unless she would be badly mistreated. She is looking for stability and she will find that in England. Good Luck !!

On Sept 17, 2008: Senator John McCain said, as he had many times before, that he believed the fundamentals of the economy were "strong."Hours later he backpedaled, explaining that he had meant that American workers were Strong.

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