So there I was behind a counter in a bank on 72 st Barranquilla, changing 15 thousand USA dollars in cash into 30 millones de pesos. The lady began counting my 100 dollar bills and a couple were handed back cus they started with serial letter not accepted by this particular bank. The nerve of those modefoques!
After filling out a long ass bank questionnaire and signing all over the fokin place plus getting finger printed I finally start getting my pesos. It took a few minutes, but it felt like hours, for my nephew to count all that money in full view of all in the bank, mostly in 50 mil peso bills
Needles to say I was sweating profoundly and shittin bricks. I walked out first with a bag full of money as my big ass young nephew followed 10 feet behind. As we approached his then old taxi, he rushes pass me and opens the passenger doors for me to jump in.
He speeds off while looking at the rear view mirrors, on the look out for any motorcycles or cars following too closely behind.
We get to the hotel and immediately ask for the hotel safe box. There!! NOTHING HAPPENED!!
Sometimes I too get caught up watching too many negative news stories about Colombia. Yes, shit does happen but if you’re vigilant and walk around with a big modefoque like my nephew and you look like a PARACO leader like me then everything will be ok.
If you need to feel safe in curramba , e-mail me at "malpariohp at yahoo.com" and I’ll put you in touch with my nephew/driver/bodyguard (below) he’s now driving my brand new 2008 taxi.
By elmodefoque on Jun 13, 2007, 07:01 in Friendly Talkzone.
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elmodefoque says on Jun 13, 2007, 07:06: we look very much alike, many think he's my much younger brother I'll get there, when I get there! 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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tompower says on Jun 13, 2007, 07:20: I'll use him elmodefoque Hey for sure I'll use him when I'm there. Does he hand out the same kernels of wisdom that you do? I've enjoyed your posts.
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Robert Jorge says on Jun 13, 2007, 08:21: I see the taxi, but where is your brother? Oh, nevermind. jajaja. But seriously, do you have any pics of the taxi? Also, how did you get the cash into Colombia? Did they allow you to declare and bring that much in? Or did you just put it in your carry-on and hope for the best? They (DAS) seemed pretty strict on money coming in, in the form of cash at the airport. Explain the process if you don't mind. He who farts in church, sits in his own pew. 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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elmodefoque says on Jun 13, 2007, 08:55: Hey RJ, no big deal, was wearing army cargo pants with pockets all over the place. Placed my money in one of the pockets, boarded the plane to Barranquilla and off I went. I'll get there, when I get there! 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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taladro says on Jun 13, 2007, 09:05: one scary lookin dude
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elmodefoque says on Jun 13, 2007, 09:07: thanks!! he takes after me. I'll get there, when I get there! 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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bhill says on Jun 13, 2007, 10:47: Re: no offense...BUT You do understand that el modefoque is Colombian, right?
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cayita says on Jun 13, 2007, 10:50: this is funny! "And just because the bank needs to be careful about changing certain bills because people counterfeit YOUR country's money is no reason to swear at the bank." sweet
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cayita says on Jun 13, 2007, 10:52: emodef way to help out your family by keeping it in the family. You seem like a good guy to me.
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elmodefoque says on Jun 13, 2007, 10:54: Wire money to where? I'll get there, when I get there! 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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Robert Jorge says on Jun 13, 2007, 20:49: Thanks for the info Elmo. One more question: What did you get for 100.000 mil? How long? And, I still would like to see a picture of your brother's (your) new taxi. What kind (make/model) is it? My buddy's cousin also drives a cab in Villavo. It is a Hyundai. It is pretty much on the road 24/7, time split between the cousin and another relative. LONG hours. He who farts in church, sits in his own pew. 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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seabass says on Jun 14, 2007, 06:16: I'm surprised that hooker didn't sniff out the cash, Elmo. They're like a bloodhound when it comes to money.
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elmodefoque says on Jun 14, 2007, 06:41: RJ, the taxi a 2008 SYMBOL by Renault and I added another $3,000. USA to convert to GAS. I'll get there, when I get there! 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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kalder says on Jun 14, 2007, 06:54: I am shocked that none of you have called Elmo on his gross objectification of women. "kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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pedro says on Jun 14, 2007, 16:01: Taxi Elmo, what about the sound system? que nota! 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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podborski says on Jun 14, 2007, 18:53: I never know what to believe in elmo's stories but who cares, they're always entertaining and I'm sure there's at least some truth in there.
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Robert Jorge says on Jun 14, 2007, 20:02: Pod, that is why I asked Elmo how he got the cash in. I thought the limit was $10 grand. And, I also heard they can confiscate anything more than that and anything else that isn't declared. I would be shaking like a dog shitting razor blades if I had 15 grand on my person in El Dorado. (or any other Colombian airport) I understand the reasoning behind the law, but they really should make it easier for travelers to bring in more money. They could record the person's info, get a signed affidavit, whatever. Eventually, I'll be buying a place in Villavo, and I am not looking forward to getting the money from here to there. What a nightmare. He who farts in church, sits in his own pew. 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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podborski says on Jun 14, 2007, 20:45: I understand too why they want to track where the funds came from, but like you say, as long as you can show it's from a legitimate source they shouldn't make it so hard to use a bank transfer.
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elmodefoque says on Jun 15, 2007, 09:04: Taxi"Elmo, what about the Taxi I'll get there, when I get there! 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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expatriate says on Jun 15, 2007, 16:11: Taking cash out of a bank needs planning What Elmo did was change dollars for Pesos, then took a taxi directly to a guarded hotel, which is OK. The problem is when you withdraw a large amount of Pesos from your own bank account at the teller, then go straight home. If you are young, skilled, and intelligent, you might want to seriously consider leaving the US now, while you still can. 0 funny, 0 helpful. |
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Lucho562 says on Jun 15, 2007, 17:42: Simoncho Great post elmodefoque!!!!!!!
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elreydelostrolls says on Jun 15, 2007, 18:10: I keep telling you guys you need to be in tight with people who are used to handling large amounts of cash. You wouldn't have these problems if you made the right connections in ParaColombia.
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