Look Who Ran Away from the Pereira Zoo

Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:08:

This is so cute:

"Poco después, el orangután salió a la pista, se sentó a un lado para ver despegar a un avión."

He sat by the strip to watch the planes take off LOL.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:20:

Cute story. Reminds me of a bad joke.

A Pastuso sees a flyer from a medical research company that wants to cross a human male with a female orangutan. The flyer asks people to participate for 25000 pesos. The Pastuso figures it'll be okay and goes to the lab where the project will happen.

He checks in at the lab and the lead researcher shows him the orangutan.

“I got three conditions before this happens, the Pastuso said. “Number one—no kissing! There's no way I can kiss an animal. Number two, I can't spend the night. It's gotta be 'wham, bam, thank you ma'am!

“Alright, the researcher says. “That can be accommodated. What's your third condition?"

“Well, he says. “I don't have the 25000 pesos on me right now. Can we work out a payment plan?

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:24:

In Cairns, Australia, they have a tourist attraction called the "night zoo".

They have a big barbeque just before dusk and everyone gets hammered on huge quantities of beer and wine. Once everyone is drunk and it is dark, they open up the zoo. It's night time and the animals are all awake and friskier than when you usually go to the zoo and the animals are all sleeping in the sun. It's a lot of fun, maybe zoos are better when you are tipsy. Easier to see this sort of thing happening in Oz than Canada, Capitan better be careful. ;)

I've been on an airport runway while tipsy and understand where the orangutan is coming from.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:26:

Definitely, Oz ia a LOOOTT more laid back than Canada. Hard to see spontaneous, adventurous stuff happening up here.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:31:

It was the Australian zookeeper begging people to drink more beer and wine so they wouldn't have to carry it back. Needless to say, you'd never see booze near a Canadian zoo.

In Toronto, by contrast, they banned plastic straws from the zoo. Perhaps if you tie 2,000 of them together and make a ladder to climb into the lion cage or something...

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:32:

Maybe people were throwing straws into the cage and the animals were choking on them?

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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msaucey says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:38:

LOL... Colombiche, you busted out the tarot cards again... LOL

Cute story...

Being drunk at the zoo, that would be a first for me... there's very few firsts for me!...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:38:

In fact almost all zoos ban straws -- I'm sure that some of them end up in the exhibits, since the average age of zoo attendees is pretty low. I think most animals are smart enough not to eat straws, though.

My sister used to volunteer to feed the animals at Toronto Zoo. She later did her degree in conservation biology. She says she heard the straws just made a mess, but never heard about choking. Now she is older she thinks zoos are "inhumane".

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:48:

that would be a fun first "drunk night at the zoo" (and there are few firsts for me as well lol).

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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msaucey says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:52:

I was wondering if they encourage you to drink so that you're not scared of the animals running around... Since animals tend to pick up on fear and attack... This way you're so drunk and relaxed, it wouldn't matter if they're chasing you or heck if it is an orangutan, probably drink from your bottle...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 11:52:

It's important to have goals. When I was young I wanted to break into a zoo by moonlight (I also wanted to own a chocolate factory). I completed this important goal during college with some buddies -- good times. This kind of misadventure can and does happen in Canada but is officially frowned upon.

I always wanted to do that on a date. "We're going to break into the zoo by moonlight."

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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msaucey says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:07:

lol, very romantic MT... I think Colombiche and I would take you up on that date.... LOL

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:10:

You might. Colombiche is pretty hard boiled.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:14:

That is almost as romantic as breaking into the graveyard!

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:24:

Well, you see what I mean? ;)

Graveyards at night are probably a little spooky, but it would be easy and pointless to do.

When we broke into the zoo, we received many of the same rewards obtained from the Cairns Night Zoo. The zoo at night really is a little bit romantic. Probably more so than a graveyard, there were plenty of active animals to see.

The Colombian in Colombiche may yearn for spontaneity and misadventure, but the Canuck in her does not. I'll bet she is FAR more Canadian than she would care to admit.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:28:

Like that Simpsons episode where they go to Canada and some teenager is spray-painting "Obey the rules" on a wall.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:31:

Ohhhh, ManTequila is trying to stab me where he knows it hurts, brave soul he is.

You are right though MT. The other day I was coming from a dr.'s appointment so I stopped at the gas station to pump gas into my honda. It was snowing like mad. I felt like a coffee so I get in line at the Tim Hortons. There were like 15 people ahead of me, everybody looked cold and gloomy. I lined up for 20 minutes and then I asked myself "why am I lining up for crappy coffee in this crappy weather and why am I looking at these gloomy tired people"... then I asked "how much am I making is it worth it?" .......and then the most important question hit me over the head "OMG, do I look as gloomy as these mofo's?".

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:35:

I'll tell you one thing, I have always been spontaenous and I have never been one to obey the rules. That is the reason why I have gotten into so much trouble. Right now I am trying to keep myself on a short leash but i'ts killing me, I don't do leashes very well. :(

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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msaucey says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:36:

I already did the breaking into the graveyard.... not romantic, but a bit exciting running away from the grave keeper.... They tend to be realllllllyyyyy old, so running, jumping a fence and driving off wasn't too bad.... Even though we almost knocked down the fence....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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El Polo says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:39:

ah yes... breakin into the graveyard, abandoned warehouse, public pools at night etc... the good ole days

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msaucey says on Dec 3, 2007, 12:41:

Yup.... Good old days.... It's always nice and eventful youth when you can say, hey I ran away from......

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 13:05:

Me and my friends got drunk and broke into a hotel's pool at 3am. The reason we got caught was cause one of my girlfriends had a very very painful unpleasant accident hopping the fence while borracha ... OUCH!

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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El Polo says on Dec 3, 2007, 13:13:

I always got away, except for one time, but I told the cop my name was Juan Valdez. LOL

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manINred says on Dec 3, 2007, 13:14:

get outside the red tape bureaucracy of the Candian government and it's not so bad. i've had a fairly spontaneous life thus far, and i'm bound to this country.

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msaucey says on Dec 3, 2007, 13:45:

OUCH, Colombiche.... But, I'm sure you cracked up LOL.....As all good friends would do....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 13:47:

I did initially but when I saw she was losing blood by the pint I called the ambulance. It was an ugly, ugly accident. She basically sat on the fence while attempting to hop... OUCH. She had to get a lot of stitches. We laugh about it now, I call her "scarface" lol.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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El Polo says on Dec 3, 2007, 13:53:

LMAO "scarface"

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 14:22:

I don't do stabby. I sometimes have an annoying tendency to speak plain truths, which occasionally gets me into trouble.

You can be spontaneous in Canada, and this is my very nature, but it is certainly not the strong suit of most Canadians. Why plan a Varadero vacation six months in advance when you never plan to leave the resort? Do you really need a printout showing the best way to drive from Toronto to Cornwall when only one highway connects them?

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 14:37:

Worst of all, when I visit my Toronto friends and we go to dinner, do you really need to spend that hour arguing the best place to go? I'm hungry now! ;)

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Colombiche says on Dec 3, 2007, 14:39:

Everyboy in my office uses mapquest to go places. They plan everything. I just drive.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 14:46:

Mapquest users suck. Worse are the guys who go to Timhortons.com to get a map showing you all the outlets you'll pass, as if you couldn't assume there'll just be one every 20km or so.

Quebec has Al Van Houtte instead, which actually does serve delicious coffee and not that burnt tasting crap.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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msaucey says on Dec 3, 2007, 15:27:

I hate to burst your bubble, but I tend to be more of on the planning side nowadays..... I used to be really spontaneous, but the constant bickering of where we're going what time, etc, etc, got really tiring.....

So, trips, I do the planning, where we're staying, how we're getting there, print out maps from mapquest as needed, collect money from everyone 2 weeks before the trip... Because, as much as I love to do things, I hate to miss things because we got lost...

Every minute counts when you're on borrowed time.... :-)

Now, if I'm just going for a ride, I'm totally up for lets see where the wind takes us.... Beach, mountains, wherever the car wants to go....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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manINred says on Dec 3, 2007, 15:28:

Van Houtte has this Colombian blend that actually isn't a disgrace to the original thing!!!

On to the main point... "Do you really need a printout showing the best way to drive from Toronto to Cornwall when only one highway connects them?"

hahahaha that is one of the funniest thigns i've ever read on this site!!!! I didn't even knew there was a Cornwall (outside the lovely english one) until I started commuting back and forth regularly along the 401, but to plan the 'best route to cornwall' is so amusing! Sums it up really, doesn't it???

I know Toronto like the back of my hand... no mapquest necessary. And I know how to get to Montreal... no mapquest necessary. Next time i plan a trip to Cornwall though, I think I'll have to get the mapquest print-out

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manINred says on Dec 3, 2007, 15:31:

also agreed on the 6 month in advance resort vacation you mentioned, but they even have those in Colombia... so we should let the Canadians off lightly ;)

I suppose it's easy for you to talk Man Tequila, toughening it up in the forbidden land of Colombia... do people in Canada look at you odd when you say you have a fondness for the place?

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manINred says on Dec 3, 2007, 15:32:

They do me. Usually assume I'm a druggie or something, or just mad.

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manINred says on Dec 3, 2007, 15:33:

Oh jesus christ i'm not making sense anymore am I?. i haven't slept since saturday. i think i'll go for some van houttes right now......

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 15:37:

As you would know, I get the treatment Colombians get everyday when I say I am fond of Colombia -- coke and Escobar jokes. But I have found people shut up pretty quickly when you say what ordinary Colombians think about their image, and why, and what you like about the place.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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Simon says on Dec 3, 2007, 15:55:

I'd like to beat the shit out of these people you refer to Man Tequila. Fokin' Colombian-hating scum!!!

HERE'S SIMON!!!!

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webmanco says on Dec 3, 2007, 17:10:

I just wanna go back home.

...A yo, déjenme queto y no me jodan má! ...

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podborski says on Dec 3, 2007, 18:00:

I worked at the Toronto Zoo (at McDonalds) when I was a teenager. I used to have to walk alone to my car late at night after closing the place down. I'd take short cuts across the grass (remember the famous 'please walk on the grass signs?)

As rational as I thought I was, I still had these visions of somehow stumbling into the wrong place and coming across a tiger or a rhino.

I was always looking over my shoulder, and pretty much jogged to my car each night.

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Man Tequila says on Dec 3, 2007, 20:28:

Simon, they don't hate Colombia, they are just ignorant pricks. Once they understand that the average Colombian suffers due to this outdated image, they often have the decency to look chastened. Canadians are very naive, true, but it is not usually acceptable here to make fun of people in difficult situations.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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