Jealousy

raulinho says on Jun 27, 2007, 14:11:

I think it happens elsewhere as well sometimes the best way to get to a woman is to go out with her friend! I think also that for Colombianas that their self esteem is related to their appearance and their pulling power and they get insanely jealous but they hate it when they get the same medicine it must be very sad for them being so shallow and superficial when they reach their 30s when they have lost their looks with nothing to fall back on.

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slguy says on Jun 27, 2007, 15:00:

In my experience, jealousy is purely insecurity- for whatever reason. Self-esteem issues, expecting that you are doing the same thing they are doing - whatever.

I have walked away from more than one latina for exactly this reason - rarely do they change.

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

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Miguel_Clavo says on Jun 27, 2007, 15:37:

jealousy is a human trait......not country-specific.....

"I would rather die living life, than to live a dying life."........ Oh, and my PM is always ON. Great Bumper Sticker: "Home of the Free, Because of the Brave"

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Leeroy says on Jun 27, 2007, 16:05:

I agree with all of the above.

Jealousy is a human trait, not specific to Colombians.

Nonetheless, "the person that you are with" is considered here, probably more than many other places, an extension of yourself. Thus, your boyfriend (girlfriend) is a part of your identity.

Fine, so jealousy is part of insecurity - but, regardless of how many people attempt to put up a front, insecurity is something that all of us mortals feel.

Although on a deep level I find this distasteful, the fact of the matter is that when "showing off" a partner, one is essentially saying "Look what I can get!" "Look who finds me attractive!" etc... A very effective way of countering this (for an outsider) is to say "Well I can get this too!" and, "This person finds me attractive too!", In practical terms, this means (for women) flirting effectively with someone's boyfriend, and (for men) sleeping with someone else's girlfriend.

I strongly suspect that the latin obsession with jealousy and possession of a partner have less to do with real life pragmatics, and more to do with the above - i.e. saving face.

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timeforachangeofscenery says on Jun 27, 2007, 17:20:

You're not going to believe this. I'm chatting with my esposa on Skype right now and and and she's accusing me of chatting with other chicas AS I TYPE THIS!!! I made the FATAL mistake. I smiled !!! :O

I was going to go on and on about the biological imperative and guys being wired differently to females, but I think that mi esposa yelling at me for typing this SPEAKS FOR ITSELF!!!!!

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elreydelostrolls says on Jun 27, 2007, 20:16:

I think you need to dump her, dude.

As for the chicas and their looks ("they reach their 30s when they have lost their looks"), not all of them lose their looks when they're in their 30s. Some of them seem to get better and better. MILF!!!!!!!!!

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Robert Jorge says on Jun 27, 2007, 21:16:

Just to re-clarify, I am talking about when a woman's friend is jealous of her. For example, I am married, things are good, so my wife's cousin starts hitting on me big-time to sabotage my relationship with my wife. That is totally hypothetical and not true. I am talking about women being jealous of other women who are also their friends and even relatives, because the friend or relative has a good relationship with a decent guy. "I hate that you are happy and have a nice guy, so I am going to try and fuck you guys over."

BEWARE of gold diggers.

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Leeroy says on Jun 28, 2007, 06:40:

"People with esteem issues are always going to tear down rather than build up."

Never have truer words been spoken (or typed).

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orestesdd says on Jun 28, 2007, 07:37:

I agree that no all women in their 30's have lost their looks. I know more than a few 30ish women and some 40ish who are as hot as hell.

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kalder says on Jun 28, 2007, 08:02:

Give me rake of Guinness and I'd sleep with Helen Mirren. And she's 103.

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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slguy says on Jun 28, 2007, 08:18:

Kalder, I recently saw an interview with Helen Mirren - that's a LOT of woman! 103 or 23- she's a very sexy gal....course- I lean towards women with brains....jajajjajaja

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 28, 2007, 08:42:

watch it boy I am over 30!!

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kalder says on Jun 28, 2007, 08:43:

Over here, they call her 'The Thinking Man's Crumpet'. I've been a fan for a quarter of a century. Ever since I saw her in 'Caligula'.

She could do with a bit of an iron, but I still would.

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 28, 2007, 08:43:

i feel more confident and better than when i was in my 20's

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kalder says on Jun 28, 2007, 08:59:

The most beautiful women in the world are in their 30s and 40s.

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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kalder says on Jun 28, 2007, 09:02:

elrey often uses Monica Bellucci as a touchstone of female desirability. And he's right.

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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kalder says on Jun 28, 2007, 09:03:

And let's not forget Salma...

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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kat1 (Moderator) says on Jun 28, 2007, 09:19:

or halle berry

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dwmte7 says on Jun 28, 2007, 09:22:

it's like i said in another thread...she want's to emasculate (i guess the word applies to women as well) her friend by trying to seduce her man. she want's to prove to herself and others that she's just as screwable as her girlfriend. been there done that. ive been back in the 'day' as unfaithful as one can be. that's why my eight kids are from seven mother's.

interestingly enough, all the mother's are friends, and the kids are like beads on one string. the mother's when tired of taking care of the kids, would say to each other, "give the kids to douglas, that's all he does is take care of kids." so pretty much, i ended up with custody of most of them, some of the time, and all of them, part of the time.

back to the colombian gals doing the colombian gal's thing. i don't think it's just a col. thing, probably happens everywhere, but certainly jealousy is a big player in the scenario. with the outsider hoping she can hoop a ticket out of the doldrums as well. my cunadas would flirt with me a lot when i was younger and more handsome, but truly doubt if there was any real intent to head for the sack. just checkin to see if i would respond to their coquettishness.

by the way, colombian men/women have no corner on jealousy. you'll find that any/everywhere.
dw

dwmte

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houstongal says on Jun 28, 2007, 09:24:

I'll take that compliment kalder...I'm in my 40's! There's a new TV show in the US called Age of Love. It's one of those bachelor dating shows with a twist. The guy is an Aussie tennis pro who is 32. He's only dated women in their 20's. But the first batch of women he meets are between 36-48. The look on his face when he met them was a classic. The second batch of women he meets are in their 20's. After spending a few hours with them, he was missing the companionship of the older women.

"It is now official: there's no place on earth where you will not find a Peruvian band." David Sedaris

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dwmte7 says on Jun 28, 2007, 11:27:

listen up gals....the same holds true for us old guys. don't miss your chance.

dw

dwmte

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kalder says on Jun 28, 2007, 11:31:

houstongal- it's my pleasure to compliment women as timelessly attractive as yourself

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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houstongal says on Jun 28, 2007, 12:15:

kalder - Just for that, I'll make you my friend!

"It is now official: there's no place on earth where you will not find a Peruvian band." David Sedaris

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arfgoblue says on Jun 28, 2007, 12:43:

Robert Jorge,

I had the same thing happen to me with two of my gf's (girl) friends. One of them even tried to make out with me (drunk) while I was no more than a foot away from my gf, who had her back turned!

I would say that this has never happened to me in the US or any other country for that matter. And it has happened before to me in Colombia.

I'll leave it up to you guys to draw out the significance of that.

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dwmte7 says on Jun 28, 2007, 18:22:

kalder...all you do is hang out and the fates bless you. oh! klothos, atropos and lakisis look what you've done for that boy.

dwmte

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kalder says on Jun 29, 2007, 00:12:

'Tis true my friend. But with such beauties here on PBH, it's like the Task of Paris revisited :)

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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boston05 says on Jul 1, 2007, 10:32:

this subject has been the topic of discussion between my wife and i just recently, she"s from barranquilla, her sister , for some reason she cannot be happy for my wife , she constantly bad mouths our marriage, insinuates my wife cant be happy, shes lying about being happy, her husband(me) must abuse her. my sister inlaw doesnt have a happy marriage ,shes had some domestic violence issues with her husband, my wife does"nt want to believe that her sister is jealous,petty and envious of her life . whether or not this is more common in colombia ,not sure , but i seem to hear about it often.

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bueno_pues says on Jul 1, 2007, 19:57:

Da tu cunada un regalito por detras. Creo que ella necesita algo.

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Blkamericanylovecolombia says on Jul 10, 2007, 10:43:

I don't know what kind of people you're all hanging out with...I never seen this before with any colombian men. This is that bull talk that white american always think every one in the world wants them. Why should any colombian feel jealous of them or anyone.

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bueno_pues says on Jul 10, 2007, 18:08:

Blkamericanylovecolombia, encontraste Shanidar? El pienso que un gringo como el es el mejor regalo de las mujeres de Colombia?

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goin_south says on Jul 10, 2007, 21:54:

Why should any colombian feel jealous of them or anyone.

It's not jealousy,....or, maybe it is... It's insecurity. I think they are both the same. No? Who nos?

Where do we go from here?

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