..........Irish Navy lost en route to Colombia....

.
On the day that Chavez sent Venezuelan troops to the Colombian border, Ireland immediately declared war on the aggressor and despatched the whole Navy ( 3 ships ) to come to the aid of Colombia.

The Navy set sail for Cartagena after loading up with Guinness, potatoes and a large supply of condoms.

However the Irish Navy have not been heard from in a few days. Radio equipment on the Irish vessels only has a radius of 50 nautical miles. Carrier pigeons are typically used to send and receive communications, from the Situation Room in Naval headquarters in Dublin.

One rumour has it that they stopped on the Island of Ibiza, off the coast of Spain.
Apparently there has been an upsurge in drunken activity around the Island's well known fleshpots.

Basically, this post is an appeal to any Colombian Nationals that may have friends or relations on Ibiza. Please have them tell the Irish Sailors and Troops to go home. War here seems to have been averted.

.

By RAAAY on Mar 8, 2008, 16:48 in Friendly Talkzone.

RAAAY says on Mar 8, 2008, 16:55:

.

There is a remote possibility that they got lost and are now off the coast of Italy...........
If they spot any of those big, fat Italian women with their hairy arm pits...............who knows what might happen............

.

.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

robi666 says on Mar 8, 2008, 16:58:

"One rumour has it that they stopped on the Island of Ibaza, off the coast of Spain."

Perfect...

First, you're talking about Ibiza, not Ibaza, Ibozo, Abuzu, Buzuzu like you write it...

Second, it is not exactly on the way from Ireland to Colombia... you'd make the man in my avatar puke...

Third, they may spot this Italian

or this

"I am a citizen of the most beautiful nation on earth. A nation whose laws are harsh yet simple, a nation that never cheats, which is immense and without borders, where life is lived in the present."

RAAAY says on Mar 8, 2008, 17:04:

.
Navigation is not one of their strong points.........

Why are there pictures of ugly dogs above this post...?

.

.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

goin_south says on Mar 8, 2008, 20:16:

does the Irish Navy know yet, that the world isn't flat?

and, thank you.

chrispej says on Mar 8, 2008, 20:53:

RAAAY, you're friggan halarious! Where do you come up with Shiite?

Robert Jorge says on Mar 8, 2008, 22:32:

I never made it to Italy, but I have heard the Italian women are gorgeous. I'm sure not all of them are like Don Corleoni's Grandma.

--"I believe in making the world safe for our children. But not for our children's children, because I don't think that children should be having sex." - Jack Handy

azunoman says on Mar 9, 2008, 08:48:

the condoms were for the trip over and could also be used as flotation devices. They will remember to look for land when they are all gone

Ready, Fire, Aim

nueva york bombero says on Mar 9, 2008, 09:38:

Condoms??? That's sacreligous!! And expensive!
(I'm Irish, what can I say?)

jonas says on Mar 9, 2008, 20:39:

Raaay, I thought you were catholic. And did they take the Guinness in cans, bottles or kegs? I guess kegs and cans would float but I am not sure about the bottles. Please be more specific.

What I have, I do not want to lose, but Where I am I do not want to stay, but those I love, I do not want to leave, but those I know I no longer want to see, but Where I die, I do not want to go;I want to stay where I have never been

Man Tequila says on Mar 9, 2008, 20:50:

Guess navigation is not the Irish strong suit, eh, Raaay?

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

RAAAY says on Mar 9, 2008, 20:53:

Jonas.......condoms have been legal in Ireland for a few years now..............and from what I can gather, the Guinness is indeed in kegs.

Last sighting of the Irish Navy was as they were scurrying rapidly away from the Italian coast. They had taken a wrong turn at Gibraltor. It seems that the look-out on the lead ship spotted some of Italy's finest women on the beach. These hairy arm-pits and spagetti loaded asses, was enough to scare the gallant lads into a hasty about turn.

There has still been no radio contact so they will be getting on the correct course to Colombia after passing Gibraltor once more. Unfortunately, they still do not know that war has been averted here.

.

.........Its useless to argue with ignorance

robi666 says on Mar 9, 2008, 21:17:

They'd better hurry up if they want the trade winds to help...

poco says on Mar 9, 2008, 22:51:

Quote: Third, they may spot this Italian

Or maybe this Italian. Must not be eating enough spagetti. Damn,, Sophia Loren at seventy two. I must say 19 was better,, in some ways.

19 in 1953

72 in,, oh well,, recently.

"Violence is the first refuge of the incompetent" - Isaac Asimov

sloopskipper says on Mar 10, 2008, 08:42:

Maybe, but at 72 she is still a beautiful woman.