How my life changed forever

Hello all !!!! My name is Chris and before I start my story, I just wanted to say that although Colombia may not be the USA or England or Germany ect. ect.. You will never find a more interesting and wonderful culture with such beautiful and happy people. I am an American from California and have always been interested in South America for it's richness in culture and beauty and mystique. I never thought I would have ever had a Colombian girlfriend or better yet, a Colombian wife. I always heard the stories of how Colombia is such a terrible land with terrorists and drugs and daily kidnappings of foriegners and of women who are looking to get married only to obtain a Visa. Well, imagine my surprize when I found out that it was not all that. I met Maria back in January 2004 coincidentally from a dating site that I was just browsing thru out of curiosity and even though her preferences stated that she was not interested in foriegners and wanted to meet Colombians only, I just couldn't resist the temptation to send her a message to say hello and the curiosity if a woman as beautiful as her would even be interested in a guy like me. I figured what the hell, she won't be interested anyway but what the heck. Some days passed and no response so I forgot about her and then, "Oh my God!!!", she responded. I couldn't believe it. Anyway, we communicated thru E-mail for a while until bravery( and cheap phone cards) allowed me the opportunity to call her for the first time. I remember hearing her voice for the first time( like music and her English was so wonderful with that accent) and we continued for quite sometime until I was able to work up the nerve to say " I want to come and see you in Colombia." afterall, this was the land of all those hoorible stories and for sure, I was going to be forced to buy drugs as soon as I got into the taxi. Would I ever return or be forced to sell drugs or maybe this was all some sort of a plot to lure the American so they could demand a ransom from my $17.64 dollar an hour paying job( thats rite,, I am not ashamed to say it,,, I was a porper) or worse, my kidneys were going to be taken from my body and sold in Russia to the higest bidder. I remember when I told the guys I work with about my planned trip to Colombia( Cali for that matter,,, home of Pablo Escobar and the drug cartel capital of the world) to meet my Maria and how they all tried to scare me( I am sure that their concern was genuine) on a daily basis from going there because they thought that I was going to end up in a ditch never to be seen again. I thought to myself that well, I was already in the ditch from my previously relationship of 13 years to an American woman who made the Guerilla seem like Alterboys and so I pressed on until that magical day back on May 27th when I stepped onto Continental Flt# 3119 from LAX to Houston to Panama to Cali. We agreed to meet at the hotel Torre de Cali( not the most luxurious but definately charming and the highest building in Cali) and that I would meet her in a room and that we would meet in the dark and not peek just to first, listen to eachothers voices and then to touch eachothers face and take turns feeling the outline of our lips and eyes and nose and hair and exchange hugs and maybe a kiss and to then open our eyes and see if destiny would be for us or against us. How daring I was but then again, how daring she was as well. Me because I didn't know who could be in that huge suite( The rooms at torre de Cali can be HUGE!!!!)just waiting to take my Kidneys and she didn't know who I was either. For all she knew, I could have been an axe murderer or maybe I was after her Kidneys( us Americans have a reputation for being crazy and ruthless tyrants and imperialist with no emotions and wanting to take over the world,,,, well, maybe we are?? I don't know,, all I know is that I go to work and get lectured and yelled at by my bosses on a daily basis, hey!!! maybe they are talking about my bosses because they fit my above description to the very letter).Anyway, finally, I landed at about 9pm and was picked up at the Airport by an arranged escort and transported to the Hotel. Wow,,, the whole trip, nobody forced me to buy drugs. I reached the Torre de Cali at about 10:30pm and remember going to the front desk and asking if my Maria had checked in and the lady behind the counter smiled( She knew all the time because Maria had instructed her that a gringo would be arriving at that time and asking for her) and in a minute, I was escorted to the front door of where my Maria was awaiting my arrival. The hallway was dark and very rustic in decor and very mysterious also. I remember that feeling I got rite before I knocked on the door( very euphoric and yet I had no fear except this new fear of rejection. I mean,, what if she didn't like me or what if we just didn't click at all or what if when she saw me, I could see in her eyes that well, maybe he isn't the man for me?). Anyway, I knocked and the door slowly opened and I stepped inside and the door was shut very rapidly. The room was very dark and from behind the door, I heard, "I saw you!!". My eyes started to adjust very slowly as I pulled her close to me and as her silohuette started to materialize, I was shocked to see that this woman was even more beautiful than what she had sent me in the e-mails. I remember looking into her eyes and saying to myself," This can't be real" " I am dreaming and I don't want to wake up". Can you beileve that she was thinking the very same thing. We talked alot that night and our room had these huge windows that I remember putting her on my shoulders( She was under 100lbs unlike our American Imperialistic woman) and taking her to the window and standing rite in front of the glass with just that thin plane of glass separating us from what could have been a 13 floor freefall. What a beautiful view we had from our room at that time of the night with all the pretty lights and moonlight.Yes, I am a real man but I have to say that this had been a very romantic and euphoric experiance, simply breathtaking. The next day, I went with her to meet her family and part two of my fears then commenced. Would they like me? What would they think of me? Were they going to offer me a job selling drugs?(Kidding). Anyway, we arrived finally at her house,,,wait a minute!!! She had a house,,, and it was in a neighborhood just like here in the USA with doors and no dirt floors and a bathroom( actually four bathrooms)and it was nothing like the picture that the guys here in the good ol USA had painted for me and as I met her family( my family now), I thought wow! What a charming and wonderful and beautiful family that she had( they were just as nervous as I was). I met her two sons and her mom and her sister and as they all observed me over the course of the evening, relaxation set in and although my Spanish was very very crude, we had great conversation and a great evening. The next day, she took me to a beautiful mountain town called Calima where a friend of hers offered us her her vacation house for the weekend. It was so beautiful and had a swimmingpool and overlooked the lake and was just like out of a movie. This is where I feel that I really started to learn about my Maria. I learned that she was silly and loved to play and had a great sense of humor and a very active imagination and yet at the same time, so loving and tender and romantic and one of the most interesting people that I have ever met in my exsistence here on Earth. Our first evening, we took a bus down to the town in Calima and bought some things to cook at the house and a bottle of Colombia's finest wine( I guess) and as the sun started to set we agreed that we needed to make the last bus up the hill before we were left to the mercy of the cold night and the mosquitos. Well we were sure that we had missed it after waiting what seemed almost 2 hours and as I put my jacket around her tiny little body and she huddled close to me, Finally, some headlights appeared from the dark and our bus was magically there to escort us back up the hill. Relief at last. We got back and as soon as we arrived to the house, we went inside only to be greeted by in my oppinion, Colombia's worst threat, La Cucaracha and not just one,,, there were four of those bad boys rite there in the kitchen and me being a gringo and horrified by these hotdog sized banditos immediately jumped into the kitchen and did all the Karate that I never knew and always wanted to do and mortally wounded one of them while the others escaped behind the walls. Well, it is South America and La Cucaracha is a very big reality but I didn't care. Actually, it was kinda fun and made for great laughs and conversation and I was instantly promoted to hero status by my sweet Maria( we left the lights on in the Kitchen that night). We went outside to the patio where there were some beautiful tables and a little wooden bench and just talked as we sipped our wine together and had shared stories and laughs. I started falling in love with her at this magical mountain home. The next days were really incredible as she would teach me to salsa at night( I had no rythem that I knew of but it was in her blood. Just the way she walked had a hint of salsa to it and I really started to fall in love with all her latin ways and just everything about her. Could she be this so called soulmate that everyone talks about? Well, at that point, it was sure starting to look good and then, the day finally came when we had to leave the Mountain home and return to Cali where I was immediately immersed into the Colombian food scene. OH MY GOD!!!!! The second thing that you really need to be careful with in Colombia is the food because you can easily gain ten pounds a week on this deliscious cuisine. Her mother( my mommy now) made me a chocolate cake and cooked all week for me. Wow,,,her mother could tear it up in the Kitchen. I never ate so well and so healthy. The rest of the week was spent getting to know her family and we went horse back riding and to the famous Chipechape mall where she had warned me of all the beautiful women but in reality, I was with a woman that gave Chipechappe it's name in the first place. It was incredible but as the week progressed, I really started to develope an emotional bond with her that was as strong as titanium. Just imagine a woman that is beautiful and cute and interesting and who you never get tired of talking to and never are conversationally challenged for what to say and whom you can look at all day long and never do anything but sit with her and be as happy as if you won the California state lottery and you will get an idea of what I found with my Maria. So wonderful was what I was feeling and now being faced with the reality of having to leave in just a couple of days. What of our relationship and what was to come? She lived in Cali and with me living in California and no chance of employment in Cali( or atleast no forseeable chance of employment), was this relationship doomed from the beginning? Well, the day finally came when I need to leave Colombia and what a sad day that was. I remember sitting in the cafe at Alfonso Aragon airport awaiting my arrival in 2 hours and just sitting there with her and as the time drew closer, tears started to emerge from my eyes. For the first time in my life, I had been really really happy and felt complete and in just a short time I was going to be over 6 thousand miles away from my Paradise( my sweet Maria). I cried like a baby in front of her as we both exchanged tears. Then, she dissapeared out of site as I passed thru customs with no way to wave to her or to tell her that I loved her one last time. Well, one thing that I was sure of was that this beautiful lady was the genuine article. She really did love me after our time together and it was real. I don't know how to explain it but it was a very real and moving experiance. Since that time, She visited me in Sandiego in September of 04 and she really loved La Jolla beach and Seaport village and I took her to her first Billiards hall where we played pool and drank a beer and then went to a smoke shop and had coffee and cigarettes( I introduced her to her first cigarette.Am I a bad influence or what?)and took her for a ride in My Camaro with the T-tops off thru Los Angeles but even with all that,Nothing compared to what she had shown me in Cali.She then left me at LAX( I cried all the way home)and I returned to Cali that following October and then for the Ferria in December( Simply beautiful) where I proposed to her on Christmas day. I was so happy when she accepted and realized, this was real cocaine. This was the third problem which in reality was not a problem but a blessing and that was that although my body had to leave Colombia one last time, my heart and soul remained in Colombia. In Cali Colombia. In the heart and soul of my Maria. I had found my soulmate. Thankyou God!!! Maria came to Los Angeles in March just in time for my going away party at work wher I was the envy of every man and their wives and from there I took her to Las Vegas where her eyes became very big and then, I felt I had come closer to showing something that maybe came close to what she had shown me in Cali.I moved to Cali Colombia with her in March of 2005 and lived there with her until August and then went to Miami Florida where we were married on September 2nd on the beach in Fort Lauderdale. I am now residing in Orange County California and we are preparing for her to move here in January. I really wanted to stay with her in Cali because of her family and because I don't want to expose her to corruption(American fastfood) and Imperialists( American woman) of the USA and ruin a national treasure but alas, until I get my nursing liscense and make my Spanish fully conversational, I am at the mercy of El Presidente Bush. By the way,, I love my country and am a proud American and think that life is beautiful and especially when you find your lifes mate. God bless all of you and good luck in your journeys. The lesson that I want to pass on is never be affraid of something until you experiance it firsthand. Never let fear be in control or you may miss out on the best time of your life. I love you Maria!!!! Thankyou for having me as your Husband! Ciao y un Beso.

By mariasman on Oct 21, 2005, 11:59 in Friendly Talkzone.

bbattiste says on Oct 21, 2005, 12:45:

Do you have the audio version or Cliff Notes? I started to read this because it sounded interesting since I stumbled upon a Colombiana two years who is now my wife, but I never did finish it...I am a slow reader.

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Fionalatina says on Oct 21, 2005, 13:56:

Congratulations!!! I can tell you, most of the Colombian people are good. Women not only look for a visa, they look for love... most of the "latinos" are the macho type, what I do not like, and that was the reason why I married an American, things didn´t work out, so now I am divorce and back in Colombia. But I am happy I tried and did my best. So, I wish you both good luck and I hope you stay together for a life time.

Fiona

Fiona

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FanMan says on Oct 22, 2005, 02:48:

Bueno Suerte I am learing Spanish, so forgive me. But I hope I have as much success as you did in Colombia when you I take the plunge and venture down there in about 2 years time. I am taking the time out to get myself a little bit more established, especially on the language part. Rather ironic, that you are studying nursing. I am taking my pre-requisites right now. I ultimately plan on becoming a nurse anesthetist. So good luck to you as well in that profession, and in life as well with your new bride.

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untreated says on Oct 22, 2005, 10:43:

Beautifully written! Thank you so much for your story, it made me weep for joy for you as the same thing happened to me back in 1975, we have been together now for 30 years and you know what, Mariasman? It just keeps getting better!

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caslug says on Oct 22, 2005, 17:23:

i was good meeting you at the internet cafe.. you should ask the moderator to move this post to "friendly talkzone" and in the future breakout the paragraph! LOL! Great story, when we met we didn't have time for the full story, can't believed we switch places(you in OC and me in Cali). I'm glad i you decide to post your story on PBH. We need more stories like yours that is fun, accurate, and balance.

I can attest to all the readers that your wife is a wonderful and beautiful lady, her english is pretty dang good too! you guys looked totally in loved when i saw you two.

It's funny i just ran into ANOTHER american nurse, he's staying at the apartment i'm staying at while seeing his girlfriend in cali. He works in tampa, you nurses have a great schedule that really allows you to visit colombia for extend period without losing your job! LOL!

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RUV says on Oct 23, 2005, 00:00:

Thanks for your post I enjoyed your post. I am also from OC. I wish you the best. Keep us up to date on how things working out. You can take Salsa lessons here as well.

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dwmte says on Oct 23, 2005, 06:13:

boy, oh boy, oh boy..... well maria's man...you made the plunge and came out all the better, that including your wife.

i want to wish all the good wishes one can wish for another on you both. you will like all others have a bump or two ahead, but that's life.

i've been married to my paisa about 17 years. we had a business in los angeles up to the rodney king riots and when we lost it, we lost our lifes savings...about $350,000.00 and needless to say, things changed. it ended up in a divorce, she returning to medellin with our youngest daughter and me stuck in southern california. not for long. the way i figured, i married this gal for life and if we couldn't live together, i'd live down the street as our daughter needed both of us. soooo, it took a year and a half, but i managed to move my whole world to colombia...8 1/2 tons of personal belongings and lived in the mountains of antioquia for another couple of years (i had lived in el poblado for 2 1/2 years before) and finally managed to get us back together. we moved back to florida where we still are, remarried and are happy enough.

i can't sing the 'bowl full of cherries' like you, as my life/wife and so on has had it's share of bumps. but we're together, my daughter has both of her parents under the same roof and that, in itself is enough for me. i'll forsake my personal 'satisfactions', for those of my daughter anyday.

we miss california... that's where i was born, and we put up with florida. there's another fricken hurricane at the door while we speak and another just behind in the wings, beating the lips of the dominican republic. pity.

well friend. be patient with one another and choose love over all else and the dificult times of cultural adjustment will pass and you can glean a harvest of happiness with each other. remember always, love is not a noun, it's a verb... it's daily hard work and well worth the energy and devotion expended.

all the best to you both...

d w martin (dwmte) dwmte at bellsouth.net

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rocinante says on Dec 23, 2005, 16:14:

success To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded. - Bessie Stanley

If only our fellow brethren could realize what you have realized.

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Peso 1400 by November" Feb 5, 2008

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