Hair and the rules in colombia

rocinante says on Jan 8, 2006, 15:39:

be afraid The hair rules are:

1.) above the ear
2.) high and tight
3.) not alot of products (gel)
4.) anything below the collar is a serious offense
5.) facial hair is a no-no
6.) Long sideburns could get you 6 months in the slammer

As most people here will attest, Colombians don't like orange juice either. It's a fact. If you do a web search you might find a story of the three Canadians that met their untimely death in Colombia - when they found the bodies they were all holding Tropicana orange juice cartons. Coincidence dismissed as chance? I think not!

Plus 'white ppl' stick out like a turd in a punch bowl even if you do shave and switch to pineapple juice. Being that Colombains are so dark, being that close to the equator and all.

But seriously facial hair is not that common at all in Medellin.

Of course someone here will know someone with some facial hair. But I tend to report on majorities.

Drink Postobon Manzana, wear a Nacional jersey - JMHO

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Not that the US president actually runs the US." Feb 5, 2008

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utopiacowboy says on Jan 8, 2006, 16:58:

I am here to comment that I do not know anyone in Colombia with facial hair. I know how this will disappoint Rocinante.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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kernow62 says on Jan 8, 2006, 17:30:

I used to know someone in Colombia with facial hair, so I bought him a razor.

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Sr Tertius says on Jan 8, 2006, 17:36:

Damn right! That's why Gabo lives in exile. Only in Mexico would you be able to sport his moustache.

My father was lynched for having a goatie. I grew one to honor his memory. I too live in exile.

"When the finger points to the moon, the fool looks at the finger" (Chinese proverb)

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tomtom33 (☼Travelguide writer) says on Jan 8, 2006, 17:39:

rocinante says on Jan 8, 2006, 20:16:

trim that! A friend of mine flying to Bogota from Miami learned about the "Rules for hair" while airborne!. After the initial panic, his quick thinking and espionage savvy cleverly landed him and his moustache in the bathroom of the airplane. Luckily for him his shaving kit was in his carry on luggage. However, once going through customs in Bogota it was discovered that a nasal hair was slightly protruding. Obviously this hair had been concealed for quite some time having blended into the moustache. He never made it into the country.

"ive heard that body hair of an form is frowd apon in colombia "- The Big A:

It is believed that the constant frowning is what has caused the unibrow prevalent in Latin American countries - although this has not been scientifically confirmed.

Gabo breaks a lot of rules.

UC - you have ruined my night by not posting about someone you know in CO that sports a goatee - I actually expected you to note a prominent figure - such as some senator of Colombia that you and your wife had lunch with a few years back. But you are the "best sport" here and I do appreciate your happy and healthy attitude. I know you can take a joke.

Kernow, Sr Tetrus, Ringo and tomtom - you all have made my night. This is my kind of post!

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Not that the US president actually runs the US." Feb 5, 2008

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Sr Tertius says on Jan 8, 2006, 20:46:

Pitaya is the name of a femme fatale, one that lures you with its charms, only to stab you in the gut (in the colon, to be more precise). Colombians know this dame very well.

Rocinante: Manzana Postobón (and for that matter, ALL Postobón drinks) tastes like piss mixed with Splenda. And if in Bogotá, burn the Nacional jersey in public, and wear one of Santa Fe (see you in Libertadores).

"When the finger points to the moon, the fool looks at the finger" (Chinese proverb)

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rocinante says on Jan 8, 2006, 21:09:

piss and vodka with a splash sr Tetrus - Bogota happens to be a place where a lot of planes land in the chilly rain. I for one favor landing directly in Medellin. However after August I won't be landing there all that often - about once every two years or so...

Also I have never tasted piss mixed with anyting but I'll take your word for it.

"World economic indicators point to a democrat winning 2008. It will surely be Obama. Not that the US president actually runs the US." Feb 5, 2008

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dwmte says on Jan 9, 2006, 04:17:

for what it's worth... last time i returned to colombia, i looked like santa claus. my beard was gigantic. sure, the folks noted, but no issue. there's only one thing i hate more than beards (oddly enough) that's shaving. i spent 30 + years of my life in three piece suits in a abysmally formal world. i did my time. now, i do what i want. and as for the colombian response, nobody bugged me. it wasn't until my daughter objected that i finally shaved it off. and then? back to that damn blade on the face massochism once again. we're born the way we're born. i got enough hair for several folks. just the way it is. too, where i lived in the llanos, lots of my friends (guys) have hair as long as i've seen it back in the states. it's really no issue. all this dress code/rules stuff is a bunch of rubbish. if you're a clean person and live a sober and proper life, you're not gonna be an outcast because your hair is long or you wear shorts. my experience goes back to 1989.

dw

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seammckenna126 says on Jan 9, 2006, 14:35:

I was told by a friend that they didn't like a lot of body hair. I was also told that a good way to meet women at the beach in colombia was to wear a thong...because, she told me, women think that is very sexy. So, I'm in the bathroom and I applied some sort of hair removal cream that you leave on and then wipe off to my rear end. being fairly hairy I think I left it on too long...and when i wiped it off...my behind was very red due to the severe skin irritation. It looked like what could only be described as what one would see on the rear end of a baboon. But no matter...I was determined to look sexy at the beach anyways. I have never wore a thong before, but my friend assured me that it was a sure fire way to get a lot of attention from the ladies, so I put it on. Being a little on the skinny side...I didn't have enough back side to hold it up and having a beer gut...the front kept sliding down also...so I decided to improvise and wear suspenders to hold them in place and to keep them from falling off. Never having wore thongs before...no one told me that the small, skinny part goes in the back...so needless to say I had them on backwards unbeknownst to me and the front looked like puffy chipmunk cheeks sticking out on both sides. since I was experiencing a little pain from the skin irritation of removing all my back side hair...my friend suggested that I apply some sun block with aloe to help soothe it, which I did. So it was off to the beach to drive the women crazy with my "chunky but funky" style of sex appeal. We reached the beach and I disrobed wearing my sexy thongs that I had mistakenly put on backwards, with my sexy suspenders holding them firmly in place with white cream smeared all over my red backside strolling along the beach in my flip flops. I began to hear a commotion as I was walking along giving my best smile at the women who would notice me...and apparently I had angered the locals by being to sexy. I am sure they were jealous. they began running after me shouting what I am sure were words of anger and envy. As I was running and trying to escape the jealous men and the love smitten women..one of my beach sandals fell off..which left me trying to get away with only one shoe on. About the time I was sure I would reach the safety of a local bus, someone grabbed my suspenders from behind. I then fell on the sand with an angry mob surrounding me. Some thought it was funny because they would take pictures while one had their foot on top of me...like they just captured bigfoot or something. It was quite embarrassing lying in the sand..one shoe off, one side of my suspenders broken, baboon red behind with white sun block on it and having mistakenly wore my thongs backwards while the locals took pictures. Since then I have learned that a person can actually be too sexy for their own good.

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seammckenna126 says on Jan 9, 2006, 14:46:

Roflmao!!!!!!!!!!gingoinbogota

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