girlfriends, friends and relatives flirt with me

platano says on Apr 21, 2005, 14:44:

It is a secret arrangement they have.... They are testing you to see how loyal you are to your girlfriend.
Don't give in to their flirting. Remain friendly and cheerful always and then redouble your efforts to show your girlfriend how much you love her. It will pay off in the long run.

Platano, relationship counselor egresado de la escuela nadaista

plátano

0 funny, 0 helpful.

maleorange says on Apr 21, 2005, 14:55:

to platano I dont think colombian people are like that

0 funny, 0 helpful.

platano says on Apr 21, 2005, 14:58:

You mean to say you actually understand women! Good god, finally! Someone who understands women! Talk, man, talk! How are they really?
All I have ever experienced with women is an infinite mystery wrapped in the most ethereal love imaginable.

Platano, bobo enamorado

plátano

0 funny, 0 helpful.

william_andrew_channell says on Apr 21, 2005, 15:19:

Maleorange,

Just go ahead and tap that ass! If her mom's hot, hit it. Go after her sisters and cousins and everything. If they are just trying to test you, keep making moves and then later insist that you were joking too. Explain it as a difference of culture and that Anglos like to take jokes really far. If they actually go for it, just take advantage and do it. If your girlfriend finds out, who cares? There's lots of fish in the sea. Especially when that sea is Colombia, and the fisherman is foreign.

0 funny, 0 helpful.

Hr77 says on Apr 21, 2005, 16:20:

We are bitches because men don't understand us AT ALL. Also, women are under some delussion that bitching and tricking their men actually helps. I'm with william. It would be nice to see a guy causing one of our little tricks to backfire, for a change. "No, honey, I'm not trying to bang your sister. I was just playing along. Trying to make sure your family likes me. It must be a cultural difference, dear." :)

0 funny, 0 helpful.

Hr77 says on Apr 21, 2005, 16:21:

I CAN NOT WAIT to hear what elmo has to say about this one!!!

0 funny, 0 helpful.

miamimike says on Apr 21, 2005, 20:13:

Aren't you London Male who transgressed to Kerry and now... Maleorange...I think if you have ask here the Oppurtunity may already have passed you by-Nail It and hit the road. Pedal to the Medal, Full speed ahead.Got the plan now??

Avatar Legend: Bush "If any of you Reporters are wondering, it was a Size 10"

0 funny, 0 helpful.

Mateo-FL says on Apr 21, 2005, 20:48:

We are bitches because men don't understand us AT ALL Hr77 FYI we will never understand women. Women are a like a riddle that can never be solved :)~

0 funny, 0 helpful.

caslug says on Apr 21, 2005, 23:16:

Male, you should watch Belle Epoque.. he had similar problem like yours, and think he ended nailing all of them...

0 funny, 0 helpful.

kat1 (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Apr 22, 2005, 00:18:

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

0 funny, 0 helpful.

elmodefoque says on Apr 22, 2005, 05:15:

Going to Colombia for the sole purpose of nailing just one colombianita, is like eating just one potato chip, is nearly impossible, especially if you’re a pasty gringo. Her cousin, just back from Bogotá studying, is going to look even better than your girlfriend, even her own sister might have a nicer ass, and wait until her girl friends start showing up or Claudia, the girl down the block with lips like Kat, hair like Lauthra ass like Mrs. Gomez and with the sexual appetite of elmodefoque. That’s a sick sonamanbiche! Anyone who has sex with a beast should be put away in a mental institution. Anyway, you are going to have so many colombianitas ready to give you anything you want, as much as you want anywhere anytime. Their chiquito is gonna be coming from every which way, so why settle with just one.
Dude, don’t be too quick in dismissing the idea of nailing both the girlfriend and the mother, don’t knock it until you try it.

I'll get there, when I get there!

0 funny, 0 helpful.

ARMacleod says on Apr 22, 2005, 11:06:

Understanding the contra sex? I once had the proverbial ‘three wishes' awarded.

My first wish was that I had to meet the most lovely lady who would love me forever. Unfortunately she was in Colombia.

My second wish was for a road to appear, all the way from England to Colombia.

The Genie said it was too great a logistical problem, not enough sand in the Sahara, or cement in the world for the concrete.

I said "no problem, just tell me the secret of understanding Colombian women"

"How many lanes do you want on your road" was the reply.


Being of unsound mind and dubious disposition, I cannot be held legally liable for any indiscretions."¡El diablo me hizo hacerlo!" But don't worry, be happy.

The brain is like a parachute, it only functions correctly when it is open. Pax vobiscum.

0 funny, 0 helpful.

dwmte says on Apr 22, 2005, 12:02:

well you're standin there by the sea shore.... you might as well jump in and test the water....however, you better be the best lay in colombia, cause if you're not, you'll never get laid again...

but if you successfully treat and please, mom, sis, the gals down the street and las primas, etc. you'll not be able to beat the gals away from your door. from now til you die. and little girlie friend will just have to take you/accept you as you are, cause it was HER friends and family that got you into this fix..

good luck, surfs up.

dw

0 funny, 0 helpful.

Saltador says on Apr 22, 2005, 12:24:

Another Classic from Elmo :-) Just as predicted! Elmo, you're my idol....

0 funny, 0 helpful.

maleorange says on Apr 22, 2005, 12:30:

Thanks for the tips everyone There are my girlfriends friends and realtives all wanting a piece of the action. Also the family have a shop they rent and the woman asked me out the other day so it looks like I could have a wild time with so many women. I need advice how can i do it all without any of the others knowing. Including the mother. One way is obvious which is saying i have a girlfriend and cant go thru with this after getting it in for 5 mins. Then say you will keep this top secret wont you. Imagine being in a room with 6 women and all of them know something but none will talk and then they all know everything by looking at each other. Do you think I would get out the country alive. Should I take out travel insurance

0 funny, 0 helpful.

utopiacowboy says on Apr 22, 2005, 12:50:

Elmo's post reminds me of when we visit my sister-in-law in Bogota, a former Miss Cordoba. She has some fabulous legs and wears the shortest skirts so while I am sitting in the passenger seat, I can't help but look over as she is driving. Her skirt keeps going up and I have to check out those legs! I told my wife that it's a good thing her sister is driving because I'd have a wreck looking at her sister's legs. She is the same one who will wear a sheer lacy see-through blouse with a black bra underneath to work. I asked her, who the hell's going to get any work done with you dressed like that? If I had a gemelo, I'd send him off to nail her.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

0 funny, 0 helpful.

maleorange says on Apr 22, 2005, 12:55:

to utopia A good question you have brought up. How can women dress so sexy in every day life without falling to temptation. Are colombian women lovely but great at planning being unfaithful so you will never find out that your sweet virgin like girlfriend is at it with the neighbour and the bus driver. Also her boss at work but you will never know because she is an expert at planning ha ha

0 funny, 0 helpful.

utopiacowboy says on Apr 22, 2005, 13:01:

You can't always make assumptions based on the packaging. A Colombiana can dress very provocatively and yet be anything but promiscuous. They like to show off the melons but it doesn't necessarily mean that you can taste the melons without buying them.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

0 funny, 0 helpful.

daver says on Apr 22, 2005, 13:13:

Melons filled with silicon! Thats all folks!!!

GEESH!

Dave

0 funny, 0 helpful.

Desideria (Moderator) (Trustee board) says on Apr 22, 2005, 13:22:

silicon melons and other varieties you never know what you're buying until it's time to replant the seed...
Cheers,
Desi

"When shall we three meet again? In thunder, lightning, or in rain?"(First Witch in Macbeth)

0 funny, 0 helpful.

Lionheart says on Apr 22, 2005, 19:11:

tutti frutti I prefer peaches over melons ...

0 funny, 0 helpful.

utopiacowboy says on Apr 22, 2005, 21:31:

Don't get me started on peaches. Nothing I love better than eating a ripe delicious juicy peach.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

0 funny, 0 helpful.

tylerlover_heshot says on Apr 28, 2005, 07:15:

Well girls are afraid to show their feelings about guys, they are afraid that if they say they love you then you wont love them back and they will be crushed, we're just afraid of getting hurt!


~Nicole ♥'s Tyler Forever~

~Nicole ♥'s Tyler Forever~

0 funny, 0 helpful.