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Dirty Old Men

I've lost the magic power.

Yes, CaritadeAngel, whose beauty was once the talk of...well ... a smallish village in a smallish country on the edge of Europe, can now only delight the eyes of small boys and dirty old me.

The former come to the pool where she likes to get away from it all, (to commune with the chickens and the geese that somehow are allowed to use it too) who stare bug-eyed at the Great White Whale as if she was a sea-world exhibit. They eat things while they watch her, and then get frightened when the Great White Whale starts telling them. Holy Crap! think they. It talks!

Melancholy sets in further, as she winds her way back to her abode, where dirty old men on donkey-carts leer at her.

So, Carita, what did you do in Barranquilla?

Well, I scared a lot of little boys by asking them what the hell they were looking at, and I carefully avoided eye contact with any male in charge of a four-legged beast of burden.

It can only go downhill from here.

By CaritadeAngel on May 4, 2007, 20:34 in Friendly Talkzone. AddThis Social Bookmark Button


CaritadeAngel says on May 4, 2007, 20:37:

why why why Doesn't Peter put an edit button on forum topics, I meant of course not "dirty old me" (the keys are sticking on my com again, dammit all, but dirty old men. Dammit I'm going to bed with a good book. Way past my bed time anyway.

"Five things bring us closer to the unseen: the act of love, the birth of a baby, being in the pressence of death or disaster, the contemplation of great art, and the human voice lifted in song".

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

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scotty says on May 4, 2007, 22:29:

what f are you talking about?

Get Rhythm, when you got the blues. Johnny Cash

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billyb says on May 4, 2007, 22:40:

I think Carita has been sampling the... aguardiente tonight and no harm in that ;)

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Robert Jorge says on May 4, 2007, 23:01:

Yep Scotty, you took the words out of my mouth. Sounds like crap that would get you an A in English 305. Just write something unintelligible but make it sound profound - automatic A. I was a C student - like Letterman.

He who farts in church, sits in his own pew.

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elreydelostrolls says on May 4, 2007, 23:03:

How about posting a hot pic while we fondle ourselves?

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Man Tequila says on May 4, 2007, 23:20:

There once was a girl named Carita
In Blackburn they thought her bonita
When she went to the coast
Kids thought she was a ghost
And los viejos thought she was Lolita.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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goin_south says on May 4, 2007, 23:26:

On PBH, she was known as... Poquita mierda Conchita.

“ I would rather be a conservative nut job rather than a liberal with no nuts and no job.”

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kat1 (Moderator) says on May 5, 2007, 00:50:

she is talkin about that she is getting a lot stare in Colombia, which is normal if she is blonde, pretty blue eye woman, and she feels a bit uncomfortable with itand scare of this new kind of attention. I think i am right haven't I?

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kalder says on May 5, 2007, 01:12:

CA: Personal allure and confidence often ebbs and flows. You're just in a down patch; you'll be pulling soon enough;)

ManT: That is really, really clever. Bravo!

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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kalder says on May 5, 2007, 01:17:

And UTC- you have gone into serious decline, both literary and morally. I urge you- recall your former glory as a grandee of this hallowed site and return to the ways of dignity.

Ahem.

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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Miguel says on May 5, 2007, 03:24:

She is full of shit I gave her elmos nephew's phone number via PM so she could experience Barranquilla nightlife below "the 50's". What an infidel.

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scotty says on May 5, 2007, 04:09:

MT now thats more like it a poem about Carlita.

There once was a girl named Carlita, MT got drunk and exclaimed "Oh she is bonita"!
The very next day MT awoke to say "oh my God she's gordita"!

Get Rhythm, when you got the blues. Johnny Cash

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elreydelostrolls says on May 5, 2007, 06:30:

Kalder, so I've gone down from the gutter into the sewer?

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webmanco says on May 5, 2007, 08:18:

White women are looked a lot in the coast. Don´t need to be old to be dirty, neither need to own a Mercedez or BMW or a Zorra :-)

...A yo, déjenme queto y no me jodan má! ...

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billyb says on May 5, 2007, 08:40:

Does "great white whale" in her prose... have to do with her color, or her size??

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kalder says on May 5, 2007, 08:47:

UTC Don't know about that, but you've gone from making wry and mordant observations to (the web equivalent) of pulling open your rainmac and waving your todger at the ladies.

"kalder- have you ever had a woman?"--Sam Salmon

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Man Tequila says on May 5, 2007, 10:45:

Damn those tequila goggles!
Damn those tequila goggles!

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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podborski says on May 5, 2007, 12:32:

If I described myself as a whale I would hardly expect to attract anything but other whales or similar creatures, although of course it is totally politically incorrect to say so these days.

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elreydelostrolls says on May 5, 2007, 12:34:

There are ladies here?
There are ladies here?

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CaritadeAngel says on May 5, 2007, 13:16:

BBob: both, I weigh 300 kgs and have to be lifed by a crane into the pool. I think I may be anorexic though because every time I look in the mirror I see a fat girl. I'm here to look for my sugar-daddy who will pay for liposuction, ok, so now my secret is out.

Miguel, I told you time and again, I'm just not an elmoid's type. Two legs, no implants, what can I say?

Kat, no. I was in Cuba learning timbales and jazz vocals in the Barrios - this kind of attention aint new. Nope. What's new is that suddenly I am irresistable to old geezers. Last time I was in the Caribbean, I got heathy cross section of stares/piropos from the old and decrepit to the young and hot. Now its just the old guys.

I mean, where did THAT come from?

Kalder thanks: though my confidence is fine. I never came here to pull, by the way,(must be the only foreigner who never comes to the Caribe for that purpose) but every girl likes to feel wanted, right?

Except not by the donkey-cart vejos.

Man T, you made my morning, that was bloody brilliant. Not from Blackburn though. From WAY further north. So far north, in fact, the Romans built a wall just to keep our blue arses out of their faces.

"Five things bring us closer to the unseen: the act of love, the birth of a baby, being in the pressence of death or disaster, the contemplation of great art, and the human voice lifted in song".

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

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Man Tequila says on May 5, 2007, 19:00:

Blackburn, Bowden, Bunessen... same difference ;)

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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mecca says on May 5, 2007, 19:53:

Web, white women are looked at everywhere!!

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webmanco says on May 5, 2007, 20:15:

But more when in a land of not too many white girls, if the woman is white and pretty, try going to Puente Hurtado in Valledupar just as an example, and the guy who goes with her needs to mark territory.

...A yo, déjenme queto y no me jodan má! ...

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elreydelostrolls says on May 6, 2007, 09:50:

"the guy who goes with her needs to mark territory."

How? By pissing on her leg?

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CaritadeAngel says on May 6, 2007, 11:25:

Rey, yeah That's generally how it works where I come from.

Man T Nooooooooooooooo.

I from a different country. Different culture, different language(s), different history, just different OK. Would you say that someone from Dublin in "all the same" as someone from Birmingham?

History and Geography books are interesting and informative, and the intellectual benefits of their study have been proved by science. Start with a kids book called "Bloody Scotland", from the Horrible Histories series.

"Five things bring us closer to the unseen: the act of love, the birth of a baby, being in the pressence of death or disaster, the contemplation of great art, and the human voice lifted in song".

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

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Man Tequila says on May 6, 2007, 11:51:

I was just messing with you, CA. My parents are both English and I have a Scottish grandmother. I'm well aware of the history and the differences between Scotland, England, Wales and Ireland. I have travelled to all of these nations. I am already a history buff, and familiar with Bannockburn and Culloden.

The town you come from does not make a difference from the perspective of iambic meter. Canadians often make a big show about not being Americans, New Zealanders about not being Aussies, Walloons about not being Flemish. Perhaps you missed the wink after my comment. Perhaps people from Ballyfermot are the still the same species as Brummies.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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elreydelostrolls says on May 6, 2007, 11:52:

SNP rocks!
SNP rocks!

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Man Tequila says on May 6, 2007, 12:03:

Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers.

Aunque no me creas/ si me lo propongo/ lograre olvidarte/ porque a fin de cuentas/ no soy tan cobarde./ Y termino todo una de estas tardes/ no sera dificil buscar algún sitio donde refugiarme/ donde nunca mas vuelvas a encontrarme. (Polo Montañez)

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goin_south says on May 6, 2007, 12:59:

...mark territory....en Valledupar?? elrey, I think he had something more radical in mind, like JUST 'DOING IT' IN THE ROAD...jejee

“ I would rather be a conservative nut job rather than a liberal with no nuts and no job.”

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elreydelostrolls says on May 6, 2007, 13:28:

Oh, I thought he was going to piss on her like a dog to warn all the other dogs.

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Cerealkiller says on May 7, 2007, 02:42:

haha Man Tequila, that used to be my favorite movie ever.

Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives -John Stuart Mill

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elmodefoque says on May 7, 2007, 04:57:

and what the hell is wrong with digusting dirty old men???

I'll get there, when I get there!

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elmodefoque says on May 7, 2007, 04:58:

i happen to be one and quiet FOKIN PROUD!!!!!

I'll get there, when I get there!

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elmodefoque says on May 7, 2007, 05:20:

The difference between Colombian dirty old men and gringo dirty old men is that in Colombia we really get to have sex with young broads and gringos have to choke the chicken while calling sex phone lines for $1.99 per minute Before I discovered the wonders of Colombia I ran a $559 dollar monthly phone bill.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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morphus says on May 7, 2007, 09:48:

Theres a lot of dirty young men too. I had girlfriends, yet I was still going to peep shows during my lunch break at work. Maybe its good Mayor Guliani closed them down :)

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CaritadeAngel says on May 7, 2007, 19:49:

And then theres the hissing Sounds like a jazz tune by Billie Holiday.

I don't know why but I'm feeling so glad
About all the dirty ol' codgers, that I never had
Thank God they're not kissin'
Just a lot of hissin'
For some reason he's winking at me!
O false teeth where can you be?

Morphus, think man! Look what you're turning into. In a few decades you'll be just like elmo ... ah the road to perdition is wide and easy. It starts as a harmless flirtation, and then before you know it you ... noooo save yourself while you still can.

Today I changed my route to the pool. Down a road I'd never been before. Dirty Old Man CENTRAL. Had to run the gauntlet.


"Five things bring us closer to the unseen: the act of love, the birth of a baby, being in the pressence of death or disaster, the contemplation of great art, and the human voice lifted in song".

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

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elreydelostrolls says on May 7, 2007, 21:25:

"In a few decades you'll be just like elmo..." If that was an insult it missed. Any young man would be honored to grow up and emulate the Master.

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morphus says on May 7, 2007, 22:38:

Save myself from what? I'm not as bad as I used to be when i was in my mid-twenties. I once had sex with 5 girls in one day. Now, 5 girls in one week is enough.

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webmanco says on May 7, 2007, 22:40:

and emulate lots of emulating aroud

...A yo, déjenme queto y no me jodan má! ...

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morphus says on May 9, 2007, 20:54:

.

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CaritadeAngel says on May 11, 2007, 10:35:

So does this mean you were crap in bed five times a day, as opposed to a mere five times a week?

Quanity don't impress me much. Especially when said lass comes to me afterward, and tells me

Carita, it was terrible! I've been vacinated more slowly!

Free your minds, lads. With a bit of luck, the rest will follow. Maybe.

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

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morphus says on May 11, 2007, 11:37:

5 girls, 5 loads. Now 5 girls a week, 4 or 5 loads a day.

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morphus says on May 11, 2007, 11:40:

CaritadeAngel, if you don't like men hissing at you, you should do what the girls here in New York do. A lot of chicks here wear a walkman so they don't hear what men are saying to them in the street. Whenever I see a girl with a walkman, I don't even bother.

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CaritadeAngel says on May 11, 2007, 12:57:

Did I say I DIDN'T like it?
I was lamenting that the hissers weren't fit and hot, like you, Morphus. You need to read more if you think that shooting your load makes you good in bed though. :D

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

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Miguel_Clavo says on May 11, 2007, 13:50:

Morphus, shooting yourself in the foot doesnt count, either.. jajaja..

Just my opinion...

Miguel_Clavo =)..aka, DragonSlayer..2-0..Colombia es pasión!

"I would rather die living life, than to live a dying life."........ Oh, and my PM is always ON. Great Bumper Sticker: "Home of the Free, Because of the Brave"

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CaritadeAngel says on May 11, 2007, 18:09:

Then you are not interested in women. You are interested in the pleasure for which a woman is the necessary apparatus.

May I recommend shagging a melon. The melon has no feelings, and will not be hurt, and you will not be shamed. The melon may even think you are a man.


"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

"I hope I never say anything worth quoting".

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