Did she go back and?????

Gator says on Apr 30, 2009, 06:39:

Let your attorney handle this.

"Bene, cum Latine nescias, nolo manus meas in te maculare" .

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sanandressi says on Apr 30, 2009, 07:16:

Attorney? Yes, I got em....

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davidyamiga says on Apr 30, 2009, 08:31:

I just got divorced from a Colombiana. No kids. The absolute thing to do is to treat this situation as a BUSINESS. Do not let moral or feelings get involved in your decision. Do not get involved with her or her family in any type of decisions. Let your lawyer handle everything. It is much easier.

On the road again....

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Rikito says on Apr 30, 2009, 08:33:

For the time being, I strongly suggest that you put your money and other financial holding somewhere she cannot get to. This goes for any precious or expensive items that would be difficult and/or impossible to replace. If the marriage is broken then you need to put the whole thing behind you ASAP. I assume that you have a prenup right? NO? Please don't say NO. And if you listen to anyone person in here listen to 'gator.' he used the word attorney...get one quickly and use him/her to put it behind you.

Your most important task at this point is to do everything possible to protect the children. You can't get her committed because that would take too long in the courts and would be difficult to prove. If she wants to go back to Colombia, let her...buy her the tickets. You have the children and that is all that matters.

Good luck...I have done this 3 times and it never gets easy.

...and so it goes

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Rocco81 says on Apr 30, 2009, 12:45:

3 Times? All with Colombianas Rikito???

Yeah thanks god I have never been married or I might have been divorced already..but, let me ask you. Did you see this coming ? Did you see crazy tendancies in the start of the marriage or even in dating? I'm not being critical just realy genuinely asking. I once dated a chick that I was sooo into that I made every excuse for her, but then after about 6 months I just had to cut her loose.

Sic semper tyrannis

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Rikito says on Apr 30, 2009, 12:52:

nope, no colombianos, a trust funder from Tulsa who spent every waking moment trying to change me, a really gorgeous girl who left me for her boy friend who was a drug dealer. He is now dead and she is in Canon City, Colorado, and a really nice woman I really fucked myself up with...all my fault on the last. You always see it coming...you just don't want to admit it.

...and so it goes

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Rocco81 says on Apr 30, 2009, 13:05:

Yeah that sucks man...I am still a bachelor and I love it. Much like you I have had great women that I should have kept around and I've had horrbible women that I couldn't away from fast enough.

As much as I love being single, I would be a liar if I said I didn't want kids and a family, plus its good to have someone around to share stuff with. But damn all that is not worth the stress some of these chicks cause.

Sic semper tyrannis

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Rikito says on Apr 30, 2009, 15:02:

But, now I am married to the best woman on earth. We make an effort to communicate, overlook each others weaknesses, and be partners in our relationship. When I look back I admit that I was probably the casue of 70 of the problems. Why? I let communications breakdown. If you do not communicate openly and with respect to each other you will not have a marriage for long.

...and so it goes

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Ken says on Apr 30, 2009, 16:45:

How the hell did you end up with a loser like that? Sounds worse than the one I got now. She would never leave her kids behind.You must have even more of a "Caradebobo" than I do.

I would not recommend anyone bring their Colombianas to their home country. Keep your money in your home country, your marriage in Colombia.

FORGET Prenuptials. Not worth the paper they are written on.Just a way to waste more money on the lawyers.At least that is how it is in Canada.

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dwmte7 says on Apr 30, 2009, 18:08:

san andressi....i'm not gonna weigh you down with advise, you seem to have your 'ducks in a row'

as most on pbh know, i spent half my life in divorce court as well as my money. it's a no win...for either side. it's just a lot of heart ache and plain ole pain in the ass. you have your children and that, in and of itself, is a handful. not that it's not well worth the work, it's like a bunch of little yous so tending them and dealing with their needs, is really a labor of love.

i ended up raising most of mine, the mother's ganged up on me and said 'fuck douglas' let him see what it's like and just gave em to me. that after fighting like hell in court. it was never a war about the children, just property and them wanting to drive nails in my coffin. i've been married 7 times--8 if you count one, twice--and eight children.

so with that behind me and a 'NEVER AGAIN' policy. i seriously changed my ways and don't "dick" around any more.

so back to you, just get the painful part behind, and keep focused on the children. you're gonna do fine. as a couple have said above, i wouldn't contact the family right now, do that by how you feel. but as i said above, i don't want to be an advise source, as i clearly failed in the marriage dept. i do know this. even the worst marriage involves some attachment, one to the other, as it's a human/heart investment. so just keep focused and try not to let vindictiveness enter the equation as it just drags the 'shit' out and fills the attorney's pockets. don't need to tell you about those guys. they are who they are and do what they do and none of it is in you and/or your children's interest.

keep your chin up buddy, keep smiling, and "this too shall pass"

all the best, douglas

patriarch

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ujay says on Apr 30, 2009, 18:18:

ah don't worry you got the best part ,you got your kids ,wives can come and go ,but your kids are yours always.

http://www.jukelightning.com

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Robert Jorge says on Apr 30, 2009, 20:30:

I could write a book on this topic. But I digress.

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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dwmte7 says on May 1, 2009, 03:43:

here we are, the legions of the walking wounded!

patriarch

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utopiacowboy says on May 1, 2009, 04:21:

All these bad news stories about marriages to Colombianas gone wrong. I think they're disparaging Colombia and are not in keeping with the spirit of the site, which as we know is all about sweetness and light, the fantasies of the pasty gringo in his delirium.

Disclaimer: any comment I make is inane and is not to be taken seriously, and is so patently ridiculous that no one should take it seriously, even as an insult.

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dwmte7 says on May 1, 2009, 05:21:

you tell em, cowboy......no more of this brokeback mountain stuff, those brothers who marry colombianas need to know that they ain't playin with toys. they're real women, with real feelings, hearts and souls and in my experience, when treated so, respond so. they would also do well to remember, you don't shop for diamonds in the dollar store. picking one's life mate in the dima-a-dance hall is not necessarily a wise decision.

patriarch

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goin_south says on May 1, 2009, 06:16:

People said, 'When the USA gets a black man for president will be the same time that Pigs Fly'.....

So, here we are, 100 days in and...............the Swine Flew.

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sanandressi says on May 1, 2009, 10:35:

Well, it was not that I married a Colombian but rather married the wrong Colombian. Would it be fair to knock all of Colombia because of this? We almost made it to ten years. She does not know what she wants and when she has gotten what she thinks she has wanted it has not been enough. (I also found out she has been cheating the last year or two.)

The worst of it is that she is not considering her children but this is the way she is at heart. Oh well.....

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davidyamiga says on May 1, 2009, 11:12:

Sana...may be just the wrong girl? Does not have to be a Colombiana. But I am a glutton for punishement! I am on my third colombianita and hope to be the last one!

On the road again....

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Mononoke28 says on May 1, 2009, 11:20:

Sanandressi, don't worry about what will happen to her or what decisions she needs to make, it's not your responsibility any more even if she's the mother of your children. It is HER responsibility to be a part of your children's lives, not yours. You've been very blessed with the fact that you got to keep the children and they will eventually see your wife for what she is depending on what decisions she makes when it comes to them. Nothing you need to do or should do about that.

Diana

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Robert Jorge says on May 1, 2009, 21:23:

That ain't right dude. My condolences.

"You can not take the barrio out of the girl you really can't." Oneforamillion

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goin_south says on May 2, 2009, 23:17:

""Its just a car though, and it can be fixed"".... where as... she can't.

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