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Desperately seeking colombian friends

So there I was, at 2:13AM and I can’t fokin sleep. Soon my life will take a drastic change and many things are racing thru my head. Leaving NYC after nearly 60 years from the age of 10 is not an easy decision. I’m committing self deportation back to Curramba.
Right now my biggest obstacle, are friends! I don’t have one single Colombian friend. Outside of family members I don’t know any other Colombians and I can’t count on my gringo buddies to be around all the time. I will have to seek Colombians in Colombia, but what the fok do I talk to them about?
My only contact with my many family members consists of 5 minute visits. “Hi, I got in yesterday will be leaving in a couple weeks, yes my kids are doing fine, I’ll come back before I leave‿ never do.
I know that around Colombians you have to dress to impress, but this hommie don't play that. They aint got no TV in the living room, they actually sit around and talk, I only talk after I’m really drunk and I’m sure they’re not gonna find my stories amusing, they’ll be totally shocked. Third world minds are not ready to hear the stuff I did during the 60’,70, 80’s, 90’s in NYC.
Anyway I’ve decided to start visiting every single one of my family members and this time will take them up on their dinner invitations, parties, family get together etc.
Maybe within a couple years I’ll be a totally new modefoque, an upper middle class Colombiano hijueputa , a total snob!
Chit maybe I will attend one of webmanco's get together in Bogotá, but I won’t be the same.
.

By elmodefoque on Dec 6, 2007, 06:10 in Friendly Talkzone.

elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 06:10:

thank you!

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 06:20:

I’m gonna have to get me nicely press long sleeve polo shirts with the little horsy in the pocket. My shirt will be tucked in my slacks, no more sneakers, no more jeans no more military cargo shorts, no caps. Cell phone holder in one side and sunglass case on the other side.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 06:26:

gib, is gonna take a lot to change a modefoque like me,that's why i'm no longer invited to any of my wealthy family events. But this time i will seek them out, but just to meet and bang their north quilla friends.
Chit, i'm gonna have to buy a belt too

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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El Polo says on Dec 6, 2007, 06:28:

Elmo, there are plenty of modefoques in Bquilla that you could easily relate to, No need for slacks or polo shirts.

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webmanco says on Dec 6, 2007, 06:47:

Desperately seeking "third world mind" colombian friends

"Third world minds" Mr. Elmo

That is a new one. Very funny

Amigos de Colombia

Elmo I know a Wayuu restaurant in Bogotá.

http://webypunto.com/images/QUE_CHIMBITA_ES_ESTA_VIDA.WMA

...A yo, déjenme queto y no me jodan má! ...

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Waterdawg says on Dec 6, 2007, 06:48:

Gib , is right on the money with his comments .You made your way through the system in the States and you know who you are ! You have what you have because you WORKED for it . Colombia may be your Country of birth but ( dare I say ) you are a Gringo , and I think that is really starting to sink in !

You ran your own race in the States , you will do the same with your return to Colombia . May take a week or so before you decide to run for office , become Don Elmo , but you gona be fine .. Hey if the snob side of your family don' t take to you , f--k them !

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gabolicious says on Dec 6, 2007, 07:05:

Webmanco good one!!!

LOL I want one of those t-shirts!!!

"I will attend one of webmanco's get together in Bogotá, but I won’t be the same" c'mon elmo don't be shy...

Elección no canonización....

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GregYohn says on Dec 6, 2007, 08:54:

Hola!

Making friends in Colombia is possible by talking with neighbors and even people you may meet in regular visits to the shops you visit.

Go to a football game or something like it to meet people. We met a bunch of kids and chatted during the game.

When I was on the beach in Cartagena last Easter, we met nice people from that town. If we were not tourists, we could have suggested going out some time or visiting their place.

Ultimately, being recently from USA allows you to speak of the nice things of Colombia!

12VOIP.com gives free calls to Colombia.Greg

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 08:59:

greg, one problem, colombians don't talk to me, most fear me and ofcourse i don't look gringo at all or friendly for that matter. i look like your typical modefoque from south curramba, big, black and ugly, so they avoid me like the plague.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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morphus says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:05:

Make friends like these:

ioi9898

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:06:

i wish i could show you a current pic, but i don't want any problems with colombian authorities. Just imagine arriving in curramba and the DAS guys reconizing me.
Well looky here, we got elmodefoque, that very same modefoque that is always shitting all over our beloved country of colombia. ven por aca indio hijueputa!!!
the end of me, no CHUCHA NO NOTHING IS OVER

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:08:

MORPH THAT BROAD TO THE RIGHT IS SIMPLY STUNNING, SHE TOOK MY BREATH AWAY, WOWW!!!

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:09:

CARA DE BARRANQUILLERA DEL NORTE

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:10:

LA CREMITA DE CURRAMBA

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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El Polo says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:23:

Nice...I like!!!

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:23:

Greg, I see you have a nice approachable friendly gringo face, I don’t!
One day I look like a PARACO
Next day I look like a FARACO
Following day I look like a NARACO
As long as I don’t look like a MARICONAZO is ok.
I’ve also been told by a PBH member that I look like a crooked costeño politician.
There is no escape for me.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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GregYohn says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:26:

Hola!

Ja Ja!

Just start talking! They will consider you a loco Gringo soon enough!
Free Image Hosting at allyoucanupload.com

12VOIP.com gives free calls to Colombia.Greg

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Albatross says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:27:

Is that guy real ?
He looks like he's made from cardboard... especially his head.
It looks like someone propped him up for the picture.

Anyway... the one on the right... ABSOLUTELY.

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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elmodefoque says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:39:

chit, one guy in NYC thought i was Osama BinVaina, a fokin terrorist

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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El Polo says on Dec 6, 2007, 09:49:

probably some "know-it" all tourist

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gabolicious says on Dec 6, 2007, 10:23:

Albatross I thought the same about the guy... nice latinas indeed!!!!

Elección no canonización....

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Lowell says on Dec 6, 2007, 10:35:

Elmo, after you've settled in and begin to deal with the every day insane nonsence, I bet that you'll be less tolerant than some gringos are. Gringo/Colombiano? With a very firey spirit. Uh oh.

Alfred E. Newman. "What. Me Worry?"

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Robert Jorge says on Dec 6, 2007, 14:32:

I think the chicas Aguila picture was photoshopped. That dude's face just looks like it was cut and pasted into the picture.

BEWARE of gold diggers.

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Albatross says on Dec 7, 2007, 05:02:

He's certainly looks old enough to be.

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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elmodefoque says on Dec 7, 2007, 05:03:

i must be going loco, i never noticed that modefoque until now, all i see is that chick to the right.

PROUD ENEMY OF THE RIGHT WING!!!!!! THANK YOU!

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gold digger says on Dec 8, 2007, 22:14:

The head is definitely photoshopped in there. No way the tan on the hands matches that face. I would paste my head on that guy but I wouldn't want to take anything away from the girls on there. lol
Those girls are HOT. I wonder how much they cost?

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slguy says on Dec 9, 2007, 10:15:

There's a guy in that foto??????

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

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msaucey says on Dec 9, 2007, 21:28:

I think the girls are part of the beer promoters.. Aguila... they are cute....

But, maybe the picture was most likely photoshopped...

Desi, is this the white, pastey gringo you always refer to?...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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christobeldawg says on Dec 9, 2007, 21:48:

what guy?

admittedly, arriving can feel great too

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msaucey says on Dec 9, 2007, 21:49:

Go further up... the picture Morph uploaded

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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christobeldawg says on Dec 9, 2007, 21:53:

I know. I was just playin, as in that one on the right is so good lookin that I don't see nothin else, particularly don't see no pasty old dude.

admittedly, arriving can feel great too

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msaucey says on Dec 9, 2007, 21:55:

LOL... Now, I get it.... I'm a bit tired... Time for sleep....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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christobeldawg says on Dec 9, 2007, 21:56:

dont go..

admittedly, arriving can feel great too

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