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Close Encounter of the Corroncho Kind...

This weekend I was driving around town. At some poing, I caught myself driving behind some colombian dude on a van that had this knitted map o colombia stuck to the rear window. Beside the fuzzy colorful map, was a colombian flag huge enough to hold its own atop "El Palacio de Justicia". He had one of those little plastic dogs that wobble their head as the car moves... except - get a load of this - the dog was wearing this perfect little sombrero vueltiao. What a piss! I almost died seeing that little canine corroncho figurine. I switched lanes and sped up, so as to drive beside him. I had to check whether this guy had an arepa hanging from his rearview mirror.

On the side window he actually had a little "Cole" figurine (one of those that stick with little suction cups). I rolled down the window as to say something to the guy, maybe "ole, parce, donde compraste esa chimba de mapa?" but noticed that his car was vibrating, he had some loud music going on, I suspect he must have been blasting Diomedez Diaz. The man behind the wheel had an uncanny resemblance to Lizandro Mesa.

Finally, I parted ways with this cultural patrimony on wheels. I still can't figure out how this manages to check his blindspot through that fuzzy bright yellow peninsula de la guajira. Silly me, colombians don't need blindspots, after driving in Colombian traffic we develop a sixth sense, a sort of radar that tells us where people and things are situated.

I'll bet once this guy puts enough mileage on the van, he will upgrade to a full-blown chiva. I hope I run into him again, I think he might be my soulmate... Ja ja ja.

By Colombiche on Oct 24, 2005, 09:58 in Friendly Talkzone.

elmodefoque says on Oct 24, 2005, 10:23:

Colombiche, I always imagined you being my soul mate. I better get my ass up to Canada real soon before that corroncho modefoque gets to you first. All I need is a chance out on the dance floor. One vallenato song is all I need. I’ll squeeze you like a real corroncho, you will feel my heart beat, I’ll sweat all over you, they’ll have to peel my black ass from you

I'll get there, when I get there!

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elmodefoque says on Oct 24, 2005, 10:29:

muy posible que salgas preña despues que bailes conmigo.
no te gustaria un corronchito?

I'll get there, when I get there!

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Colombiche says on Oct 24, 2005, 10:40:

Eche, Elmo I don't know, do you have a big gut, cigarette breath and are you old enough to be my dad? If yes, then I will probably find you strangely enchanting. :)

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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BAQ says on Oct 24, 2005, 10:47:

Maybe That sounds like the trucks you see in MEXICO jajaja

Semper Fidelis !

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elmodefoque says on Oct 24, 2005, 10:57:

Colombiche, I don’t have a gut because I ride bike almost everyday. I don’t smoke cigarette, but damn right I’m old enough to be your dad.
Sometimes I reek of cheap booze, and the only health problem I have is excessive farting.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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kernow62 says on Oct 24, 2005, 11:05:

Elmo, excessive farting is not a health problem, it is the answer to all the world's fossil fuel problems. Here is me testing a prototype vehicle.

The Amazing Kernowcycle !!!

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elmodefoque says on Oct 24, 2005, 11:09:

kernow, damn that's funny!!!! i'm glad to hear excessive farting is not a health problem, looking at that pic it becomes quite clear why i woke up with the bed on the other side of the room.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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Rubiazo says on Oct 24, 2005, 12:26:

elmodefoque dont sell yourself short I bet Colombiche would go crazy over you if she could see you.
Colombiche, he can drink like there's no tomorrow and he has this big thick head of white hair. I bet you'd find his facial lines very sexy too!!!
Oh yeah, and he's even funnier IRL than he is on the net. Get in your car and head for the Peace Bridge now because tomorrow is never promised!!!
BTW when route 17 appears off of the I-90 take it. You will save about 1 hour of travel time, and almost $10 in tolls!

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Colombiche says on Oct 24, 2005, 12:47:

Thanks for the tip Rubiazo Next time I'm heading to los Newyores, I'll take the route you recommended. So far, I do the drive in 9 hrs, should be able to do in 8.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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Rubiazo says on Oct 24, 2005, 13:15:

My worst time ever is 7h40. I usually do it in 7, that is leaving from where I used to live right off of Dixon Rd.

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Colombiche says on Oct 24, 2005, 13:18:

Then Rubiazo You must drive like a maniac. I am a heavy footed driver and I don't pull off that kind of time. Dixon road? What a sad neighborhood that is Rubiazo. No wonder you turned into a nut. ;)

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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elmodefoque says on Oct 25, 2005, 06:16:

Colombiche, you wanna feel the sexual power of a true down and sweaty poor, burra loving, corroncho barranquillero? Let’s dance to Joe Arroyo’s “Sabre olvidar” this is one of the most played song in every corner of the worst neighborhoods in curramba. Once you dance this song with a corroncho, you will never enjoy dancing with other people again.

I'll get there, when I get there!

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dwmte says on Oct 25, 2005, 12:21:

damn, elmo... (with tears in my eyes) almost makes me wanna dance.....

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mzzmerized says on Oct 25, 2005, 15:26:

colombiche and elmo Man, you guys GOT to get together...there are FLAMES comin' outta your messages...may I add that I would like to be there when (not IF) it happens? (Just the voyeur in me coming out!!!)

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Colombiche says on Oct 25, 2005, 16:19:

Amante Latina This sounds like an episode of that show "Latin Lover" from the Playboy entertainment group.

No me den trago extranjero, que es caro y no sabe a bueno.... (Rafael Godoy)

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