Betty la Fea

slguy says on Dec 8, 2007, 15:00:

Plato, she's just being a young gal. Don't worry about it- she's being raised with good values, and lots of smarts in her house. She'll outgrow it.

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

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Plato says on Dec 8, 2007, 15:04:

Slguy,

You gotta hear her. She thinks her looks will get her through. And of course, this attitude shapes her whole outlook on life - contrary to reality.

Plato

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those [liberals] who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.--Dante Alighieri, (1265-1321)

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slguy says on Dec 8, 2007, 15:43:

She learns the easy way, or the hard way. Just like the rest of us, no? ;)

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

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msaucey says on Dec 8, 2007, 18:17:

Plato... One of the things I know you and your wife are trying to get through is the looks will only get her so far... yes, it may open a few doors, but once she's through the doors, she's going to need to be able to handle herself appropriately....

She'll learn on how to weigh both her looks and brain, it takes a little practice, but she'll learn...

You of course, are suffering because she IS a teenage daughter!

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Plato says on Dec 8, 2007, 18:50:

Thanks MS. Boys are easier to raise than girls - I tell ya! The pyschology between father and daughter is so different.

First, a father has to treat them like young ladies so that the know the difference when they aren't treated the same by other men.

Second, you have to be careful what and how you say things because they are so sensitive. Big time melodrama in my house because of it.

Third, I have to control myself from breaking heads whenever I see perverts checking out my daughter. For example:

A couple of years ago my family and I we're walking through a large mall (my daughter was 13 then). As we were walking, my wife whispered in my ear "All these men are staring at Stephanie as we walk by. " Men . . .MEN CHECKING OUT MY 13-YEAR OLD DAUGHTER!!!!!!!!!! DAMN!!!

So, I slowed my gate and let my family walk ahead of me. Until they got about 20 feet ahead of me, I started "checking out" the perverts staring at my daughter. LOL! Yes, I walked by and stared AT THEM, with murderous intent in my eyes hoping they would start something with me. There were a couple of guys who stared back at me as if to take my challenge. I yelled at them, "THAT"S MY DAUGHTER!" Many in the mall heard me. They must have read my body language too because they soon walked away.

I stood my ground and looked around for any possible pervert challengers. No one there. I was so angry, I was ready to spend the night in the pokie for disorderly conduct.

It's tough having daughters, plus they know I have that rare tendency to flip if driven to the point, something military and some martial artists understand.

Plato

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those [liberals] who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.--Dante Alighieri, (1265-1321)

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msaucey says on Dec 8, 2007, 18:55:

That's what I keep hearing, girls are harder to raise then boys... Especially during the teenage years....

Plato, if it makes you feel better, it sounds like you're a great father, willing to fight and defend the honor of your family... which is quite noble...and rare nowadays...

Girls can be very sensitive and can manipulate a situation using emotions..... Hopefully, your daughter will not do that to you....

I know I was the perfect teenage daughter, but my mom's perspective is completely different.... But, I did have a boyfriend when I was a teenager, and my kind father took him aside for a minute and told him, "I will kill you if you hurt my daughter in any way"... funny, thing is that my mom had already told him the same thing.... Didn't see too much of that boyfriend... lol

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Plato says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:01:

MS,

The point is I don't want to stifle my girls. If I do, I know it will be worse since they can pull all kinds of things behind my back. I'm concerned about them understanding the old-fashion values like "Carry yourselves like young ladies and don't put up with anyone who treats you less than that."

My older daughter, for example, KNOWS she's good looking. By the same token, I don't want that to be her weakeness either - boys taking advantage of her and what not. Niether do I want her to be hard on boys, just savy, that's all. That balance is hard to teach a teenager.

Plato

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those [liberals] who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.--Dante Alighieri, (1265-1321)

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Plato says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:04:

By the way, although closely monitored, I allow my 15-year old to have a boyfriend and bring the kid over to my house. I learned that from my uncle - an ill-tempered paisa.

Plato

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those [liberals] who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.--Dante Alighieri, (1265-1321)

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msaucey says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:10:

Plato, your older daughter is going to have to learn that on her own..... Part of her growing pains, I'm sure that you have already brought her up with the right values and morals, but she's the one that will need to learn how to make it balance for herself.....

The colombian and me has taught me to be extremely charming when it's necessary and hard at the same time.... It's a good balance, but it can't be taught.... It can only be learned by her mistakes...

As a parent, you just have to pray and hope that she makes the right choices and not too many mistakes....

As for your youngest, yes that does make sense.... My mom let a boyfriend in the house once or twice, but of course it was always with the bedroom door open or movie watching in the living room....

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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msaucey says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:11:

BTW, all you have to do is, clean out a gun, while the kid is visiting with your daughter... you know subtle message...

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Plato says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:15:

Ahh - you're wonderful MS. Thank you. Don't believe I spoke to you directly before.

You know, we kid around a lot here on PBH about meeting women and so forth ( I don't), but I am sensitive about men visiting Colombia or Venezeula, etc. to meet girls the same age as my daughter. The culture is different - I know. But still, as a father, you look at things differently. One thinks, " this could be my daughter some day." What a brain trip.

Plato

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those [liberals] who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.--Dante Alighieri, (1265-1321)

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Plato says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:18:

"BTW, all you have to do is, clean out a gun, while the kid is visiting with your daughter... you know subtle message..."

LOL! Actually, my girls are nervous about bringing their freinds home when I'm around. LOL!

Plato

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those [liberals] who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.--Dante Alighieri, (1265-1321)

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slguy says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:48:

You know, I've been thinking about this. I only have sons, so I can;t truly relate from experience, but I've thinking about the beautiful adult women I've known over the years - not necessarily known "in the biblical sense" - just known.

Only one really springs to mind as having spent her life manipulating the world with her looks. Was a brasiliera I dated for a while, until her selfish streak outshone her looks. I won't admit how long that took. ;) She lived in a fatherless household, until she became a MUCH older man's trophy wife at 19. After he died, she was alone, but with plenty of money. I think she just never learned anything else, except using her startling good looks to get through life. Plus, she wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Interestingly, after two years of not communicating at all, I recently received an email from her. Apparently she had met a charmer that was even more manipulative than she is - he emptied her bank accounts and disappeared. The last thing I told her was that one day, she'd meet a man who was even more self-centered than she is, and she'd learn a hard lesson. She wrote to ask me for the winner in the 5th at Santa Anita. jajajajjjajajaj

My point here is - it's VERY rare, I think, for life NOT to teach attractive people lessons, sooner rather than later. This brasileira had just been coddled all her life- she had no reason to learn sooner. But in my expereince, she's a real rarity.

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

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msaucey says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:52:

Well, I'm here if you need a female perspective of things.... I once was a young teenage girl that would push my limits to see what I could get away with...

=)

But, I do see your concerns with the fact that men see young women as dinner....

My uncle who lives in Valledupar is a notorious romantic and pervert!... All he thinks about is sex with young girls.... Hello, he's 74 and I sooooooooooo don't need to know that about him, but for him it's natural to talk about it.... But, he is a sweetheart!.... But, I know that men can be quite disrespectful, unless the girl tells him to back off!

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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msaucey says on Dec 8, 2007, 19:54:

Oh and I'm glad that they're nervous about bringing boys home... that's the way it should be.... Another good mind trick is to print out some articles on chastity belts... =)

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Lowell says on Dec 9, 2007, 07:04:

I'm in the same boat. I think my daughter is going to be a looker. She is now. Her mother thinks it's cute that she already taught her to blink her eyes and throw kisses. To me she already training her to flirt and use her looks. When I was young, I was a real shit to my girlfriends. Sex was the only important issue. I'd say anything to get it. Knowing that, I'm going to have a real hard time when boys come to visit or take my girl out. I plan to have many a talk with my daughter way before she starts dating. On thing I'm going to explain is the value of a good hand job.

Alfred E. Newman. "What. Me Worry?"

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Plato says on Dec 9, 2007, 08:27:

Lowell,

It may be unrealistic, and may be not, but I told my daughter to hold off until 18. And even so, her plans can get sidetracked if she's not careful. I give plenty of examples of teenage moms who have to go to work to support their baby(ies). Their boyfriends leave them because they're not mature enough to take on the responsibilities of fatherhood. Then I show my daughter young girls who go to college and become yuppies and earn decent salaries. NYC is full of them. They have their boyfriends and so forth, and of course are sexually active. Then I ask her, " What kind of life do you want?"

The hand jobs can wait as well.

Plato

The hottest places in hell are reserved for those [liberals] who, in time of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.--Dante Alighieri, (1265-1321)

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Portena says on Dec 9, 2007, 09:29:

Maintain that good relationship you have with your daughter, and all will probably go well. According to the latest research kids who have good, open, trusting relationships with their parents tend to value their opinions regarding sexual issues (like when parents tell them to wait until they are older and more responsible before they have sex, and provide the rationale for that advice as you are doing).

Also, malls can be very dangerous places for children. I worked in a Florida prison briefly (an intern doing competency to undergo trial evaluations) and found out that when the inmates finally earned the priviledge to have a few hours of freedom, they often went to nearby malls. Many were sex offenders.

I feel better! I can smile at it now, I feel better. Ohhhh, better! Gnarls Barkley

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Robert Jorge says on Dec 9, 2007, 16:13:

Portena gives good points in my opinion.

Kids at age 15 can be anywhere on the "want to have sex scale." When I was 15, I was worried about fishing, not getting my ass beat at school, hunting, cars, and then a distant 5th was girls. I was totally interested in girls .... but like a dog chasing a car, if I had caught it, I wouldn't have known what to do. I was a very late bloomer, and very awkward throughout my teen years.

I am trying to imagine what it would be like - or what it will be like - when I have a teenage son or daughter. I guess a person just can't imagine until they are there living it or have gone through it. I hope it's easier for me than it was for my parents. I put them through hell. And I didn't even get caught for half the bad stuff I did!

--"I believe in making the world safe for our children. But not for our children's children, because I don't think that children should be having sex." - Jack Handy

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slguy says on Dec 9, 2007, 17:23:

jjajajajajjaja

I can relate, RJ. One of the last times I saw my mom, she was visiting shortly after my second son was born. I was commenting on the karma - what a good baby he was, sleeping thru the nite at barely a month old. I mentioned, slyly, to my mom that I felt like I had dodged a karmic bullet- Brandon was so good.

My mom grinned a little, looked me in the eye, and said "YOU were a good baby......"

Before you throw me out, make sure I pay my bar tab

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miamimike says on Dec 9, 2007, 23:40:

Plato, due to peer, commercial and societal Pressure(esp in many south american countries) the message she receives is that an Attractive girl doesn't have to develop Intellectually as all the emphasis is on outside Physical appearence. Hopefully that won't happen in your Daughter's case,,,Imagine 13-14 year olds just off the Mother's Nipple getting plastic surgery payed for by the Parents! Why not take this money and put it into a College fund ?? Looks are fleeting but an Education is forever,,,

"Wait a minute. What did you just say? You're predicting $4-a-gallon gas? That's interesting. I hadn't heard that." -- Feb. 28, 2008 --George W. Bush, Washington, D.C.

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Robert Jorge says on Dec 9, 2007, 23:56:

Parents that are willing to even entertain the thought of buying their daughters plastic surgery at age 14, 15, 16, 17 deserve all the drama and headache that they created. And God help those poor girls. The day I pay for, or endorse my daughter getting plastic surgery, is the day I ask you all to pitch in for a sicario to blow my head off. Please let me get laid first with a prepago .... wanna die happy.

--"I believe in making the world safe for our children. But not for our children's children, because I don't think that children should be having sex." - Jack Handy

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msaucey says on Dec 10, 2007, 08:10:

Ummm.... RJ, with that type of thought, I'm sure we wouldn't need to pitch in for a sicario... Mrs. RJ will do the job.... Just let her know you want a final prepago, you'll see what type of pago you'll end up with.... lol

The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed. - CS Lewis

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Robert Jorge says on Dec 10, 2007, 10:15:

Jajajaj - very true msaucey.

--"I believe in making the world safe for our children. But not for our children's children, because I don't think that children should be having sex." - Jack Handy

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