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are colombians open minded?

we went out clubbing las saturday, went to this gay club not that i'm gay but i love them! they are so happy and the atmosphere is great too my husband loves the music but gets angry when a gay guy makes makes a pass at him or tries to flirt so i just show them our wedding rings, last saturday one of the gay guys say to me "you lucky bitch!" and i just laughed, there are were some colombian guys there too and yea they were gay but they were so embarrassed of being caught because they are scared of colombians, they don't want their family to find out about them being gay.

i also saw a guy that i know, he's a friend of the family and has been married to his lovely wife for over 25 years and has grandchildren! he was more scared than embarrassed tho! and i just felt sick and sorry for his wife! but i'm way too discreet to go and tell his family i'm not like some colombians that like to talk about people behind their backs! we called them chismosos and there are loads of those in london.

there are not many colombians in london as there are in america so the few that are here know each other and about their lives these people are way too dangerous they like to talk about others and make stuff up people like these get killed in colombia for being sapos, it's like living in one of those small colombian towns where everybody knows everybody that's the same for the colombian population in london so i can imagine how scared theses colombian gays who haven't come out of their closet feel..

i remember once in colombia my mum's gay friend was killed by his cousin for being gay! is this still going on? i don't know i haven't lived in colombia for many years so i don't know whether the people there are now more open minded about stuff like this and if there are still the old ladys who like to talk about people (chismosas o bochincheras as we called them) who still live in the dark ages.. who knows?

p.s i have posted some pictures of myself and my husband on saturday!!

By nanis on Jan 31, 2005, 13:13 in Friendly Talkzone.

Mr. Hollywood says on Jan 31, 2005, 13:34:

Issues? I'm sorry, but what's up with a guy who goes to a gay bar and then gets angry when guys are interested in him?

I lived in San Francisco for many years and always found that a polite, "Thanks but no thanks" worked quite well.

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Lionheart says on Jan 31, 2005, 14:09:

SF/Seattle/Austin/NYC etc They are exceptions in the USA as well, many gays there for a long time and are generally accepted. I think most major cities The same goes for most European countries, huge tolerance.

In rural USA the world is very different, no tolerance at all. Similar to Mrs.Gomez's description about Colombia. Coming out of the closet can mean severe family and friend problems, violence and death. I can imagine Colombia to be more difficult, because families are more close-knit than in the USA. Add to that the usual perception, as long as it doesn't happen in my family ...

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Albatross says on Jan 31, 2005, 14:20:

:| I'm not gay...

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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kernow62 says on Jan 31, 2005, 14:30:

Then just who populates the gay clubs in Bogotá, Medellin, Cali etc? Surely there must be enough out of the closet gays in Colombia that aren't afraid of getting killed. I don't know if the tolerance is like it might be in London or New York, but surely there must be tolerance in the cities. Perhaps not in the rural areas, but I think you would find the same thing in rural areas worldwide.

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Lionheart says on Jan 31, 2005, 14:43:

you are probably right There are gay clubs in the major cities in Colombia, cities make privacy easier. I assume the level of anonymity and/or secrecy is similar too as elsewhere, some clubs are very restricted for the protection of their clients. This is not just valid for gay clubs, I assume s&m clubs exist as well, with even more privacy.

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Lionheart says on Jan 31, 2005, 15:48:

I almost forgot this report I read these reports as well. It reminds me of the wild days in San Francisco of the early 80's, when AIDS was still unknown. One close cousin I grew up with ventured to SF and belonged to the early victims. He died in the 90's.

Add on to the dangers that many Colombian men are not very faithful, so it is not just bringing the disease home to Mama, many others get infected.

Being open-minded to gays is half the story, the gays also need to be open-minded about using condoms or other protection. I am used to hearing gays being cautious about AIDS in Europe and USA now, I didn't think of the dangers still being a big issue in other countries.

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Albatross says on Jan 31, 2005, 15:54:

AIDS It's a serious problem in Eastern Europe and the former Soviet Union...

“Democracy - a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." - H.L. Mencken

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lozza says on Feb 1, 2005, 07:50:

Hey Mrs Gomez
Where were you out on Saturday in London - where is that photo in the club, i was out with my girlfriend and friend at the 'ministry of Salsa' - had a great night, very Colombian, drinking ron viejo de caldas and club colombia all night.

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TiaKatia says on Feb 1, 2005, 09:10:

Homophobia Mrs. Gomez, it's not a Colombian thing, it's a Latin thing or perhaps Catholic. I have a few Peruvian gay friends, their families don't know they are gays and they try to keep low profile since otherwise they are subject to harassment.

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nanis says on Feb 1, 2005, 10:37:

Lozza The picture is from ministry of salsa although is not normaly known as that the real name is "chaney" and is very popular with people from cali, i think that chaney is probably the best colombian club in London but the gay club that i went to is called "cr at sh" in vauxhall that area is packed with gay nightclubs

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nanis says on Feb 1, 2005, 10:47:

Mr.Hollywood my husband gets uncomfortable and intimidated when a gay guy tries to flirt with him and if he's drunk he might get angry i mean if your system is full of alcohol your mind is not clear and you do things that you wouldn't normally do i mean wouldn't you get angry if somebody was forcing you to do something you are not comfortable with? we go there for the music and the atmosphere and i get on really well with gay people i have many friends that are gay and to me they are just like one of the girls but they can be real bitches too when they want to! they better stay well away from my husband! i would feel the same way if it was a girl!!!

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elmodefoque says on Feb 1, 2005, 11:06:

mi amor, not you oldgringo, i'm talking to Mrs g. a lot of these colombian guys are old fashioned modefoque. gay guys love the hell outta me and some of my best buddies were gay. i took the women they rejected, they had to settle for me.

over 5 million colombianos in USA and only 27 barranquilleros, i'm one.Curramba, el mejor vividero del mundo!

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soccerstud says on Jun 29, 2005, 21:13:

yup yea pretty much it still like that but not as much in the big cities and yes there r a lot of closeted married men.

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N2Aquatix says on Jun 30, 2005, 11:40:

Gross Gay married men??? That's just gross! Imagine the poor woman giving him head and never realizing that she's eating a fudgesicle. :(

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caslug says on Jun 30, 2005, 11:56:

Well N2A.. That's what happens when ANY society FORCES gay into the closet. They'll married for apperance sake and both parties will suffer because SOCIETY is not accepting. Interestly SPAIN just legalized Gay Marriage. And there's LOTS of macho men in SPAIN, yet the majority pass that legistlation. Shocking that a HIGHLY conservative, religous and macho country would do that.

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N2Aquatix says on Jun 30, 2005, 12:02:

Macho Man Remember that song by the village people, "Macho Man?" Those guys were all gay. LOL!!!

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caslug says on Jun 30, 2005, 12:32:

Village People.. I've been to couple of clubs in COL where they play YMCA! Everyone was doing the dance Y-M-C-A at the club. It's such a universal happy song! The US Navy used IN THE NAVY for recruitment, way before the don't ask don't tell policy, ja, ja.. The Village People songs are great, catchy, fun tunes with great hidden story on GAYS in America. Straight people had no idea while gays understood it on all levels.

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N2Aquatix says on Jun 30, 2005, 12:39:

70's Yeah, that's true, but you must also keep in mind that during the 70's homosexuality was more excepted.

Jay

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